Raising sons

Canada
February 28, 2008 11:18pm CST
I started a discussion yesterday about raising self-sufficient, independent daughters. I only have two girls but later in the day, I thought about how I would raise boys. Do you teach your son to cook? to iron? to do laundry? to sew? Will they be self-sufficient or will they always need a mom/wife to care for some of their needs? The other discussion talked about changing tires. I know most guys know how but who taught them? Dad? or do guys just hang out with friends, blow a tire and then 'pretend' to know what their doing until finally someday they get it right? lol How do they master this skill? How do they learn about tools, and electrical panels, and building decks... Why is it that women assume men are more inclined to know these things?
4 people like this
10 responses
@jillmalitz (5132)
• United States
1 Mar 08
I know a lot of guys apparently learn stuff from their friends. Many dont want to learn how to cook,clean or iron while they are home. They think it is beneath them. Then later they discover they need some help.One the other hand my stepdaughter didnt even know how to sew on a button until I showed her a few months ago. She was going to take the item to the cleaners. Yikes. My son learned to cook from his stepfather and from a job he once had. I am still not sure if he irons.
@ayou82 (3460)
• Philippines
1 Mar 08
I will teach my kids to be domesticated. Boys or girls or whatever should know how to do this and that. Coz you never know when you will be around them. And when the time comes they have to live with their own they dont know anything ..or when they get married the wife leaves them because they totally know nothing. Give them a good practice..Because men is always the boss around the house ..how could be a good boss if you dont know the hands on.
• United States
29 Feb 08
I have 3 boys and I am trying real hard to raise them to be independent men. I taught my 17 and 13 year olds how to cook certain things, now my 17 year old can cook the mess out of some buffalo wings, lol. They both know how to do laundry and how to iron. As a mother, I find it very important to teach our children to be self-reliant, not having to depend on anyone else or if I were to get sick one day, they will be able to take care of the house. No woman is going to want a lazy man right? and one of the best things a man can do is cook a good meal, lol.
• India
29 Feb 08
i think we should teach boys to do every household things that usually girls do.
@CanadaGal (4304)
• Canada
29 Feb 08
I am a single mom to all boys. The twins just turned 7, and the older boy will be 9 in May. I do not coddle them, and I make sure they play regular roles in our family home. My job as a parent is not to be their best friend enabler or slave, but to teach them how to be self sufficient in the real world. At present, their duties include putting dirty dishes in the sink, setting the table for meals, bringing their laundry hampers to and from the laundry room, putting their laundry away, tidying up the playroom and their bedrooms, and putting out the garbage and recycling. I also have them join me when grocery shopping now and then, and they understand that some things will not be purchased unless they are on sale. I told myself that by the time they were 9 yrs old, I would have them doing all of their laundry on their own. Seeing as my older boy will soon be 9, I will have to get a move on. ;) As for cooking, all of the boys know how to reheat things in the microwave, but that is about it. The older one started making toast a couple of years ago, but he took it out once when it was too hot, and hasn't wanted to try again since. I will start teaching them how to cook some basic things very soon, mostly in the microwave.
@Ldyjarhead (10157)
• United States
29 Feb 08
My sons could take care of themselves for sure. They learned basic cooking at home and can handle themselves in the kitchen if need be. They were taught how to thread a needle and sew a button. They found if they wanted their clothes ironed 'just so', that they needed to figure out how to do it themselves. They're 23 and 26 now and yea, I think they're pretty self-sufficient.
@Sissygrl (10915)
• Canada
29 Feb 08
Lol can i answer the last questiong first and the first question last ?? I have hung out with a lot of guys in my lifetime. I used to enjoy their company over the company of a womans, that has changed now in my older years for many reasons. But, i found that guys will NOT admit to not knowing how to do things in most cases!! espeically if its something manly like changing a tire.. well something THEY consider manly lets say. They will just mull through it trying to do it no matter HOW long it takes them. My moms Bf for example is NOT very handy, but my dad was a carpenter, and my mom wanted a curtain rod hung, well something that would have taken my dad maybe 10 mins to complete took the bf a good 3 hours lol. It got done either way, and my mom enjoyed watching him sweat and curse i think. *giggles* I have one girl, and i have another on the way, VERY soon now!, and i really dont know what i would do with a boy if i had one! i was sort of scared that this baby in my belly was going to be a boy to be honest! My hubby is not the manly type really, i mean he's not feminen or anything like that, but he's more into electronics and geeky stuff rather then cars and fixing stuff. I was surprised yesterday when he offered to take the vacuume apart for me when i sucked up one of those little light blulbs and it got stuck in the hose. lol usually if i get something stuck in there i gotta fix it myself! I am not apposed to doing "manly" things, i like being able to fix stuff.. and i dont bake, i do cook, although i dont iron anything. lol. i like a little of both worlds i guess. and i've started to ramble. Good morning mommma ;)
@carmelanirel (20979)
• United States
29 Feb 08
Oh yeah.You remember my response on how my husband didn't teach me or the girls about changing tires and things? Well as the main cook and cleaner here, I do teach my boys everything I can..In fact, I always wait until my 5 y/o is free before I bake cookies because he loves to help..And of course he helps with dishes and for some reason, loved to wash the windows...lol
@SViswan (12072)
• India
29 Feb 08
I have two sons....one is too young to be learning anything...but I don't think it's too early to teach them to be self sufficient. I am training the younger one to pick up after himself and put his toys back (which is doing quite good). He's 15 months old and is eating on his own...and ALMOST potty trained. My older son who is 7 has been taught to be self sufficient and I don't believe in mothering anyone. My husband doesn't think it's right to get them to be independant...but what do you expect from someone who is still mothered by a mother, grandmother and 3 aunts?! My husband is not even inclined to the 'typical' men stuff. 'I' am the one who changes lights and does the odd jobs around the place...and fortunately my son is following and learning to do all things. The only thing that I follow my husband's advice in is medicines (he's a pharmacologist).
• United States
29 Feb 08
I have five kids, four of them are boys. The 12 yr old boy knows how to cook, how to sew on a button, how to sew a straight line with a sewing machine, how to do his own laundry. He doesn't really know how to iron yet, but that one is coming. The 9 yr old also knows how to use the sewing machine, and how to cook some simple things in the microwave and he is currently learning how to use the washer. The younger two (they are 6 and 3) don't know too much... lol