Does Anyone Else Feel This Way?

United States
March 1, 2008 5:40am CST
I have had depression for a few years now. It has recently got worse, I started taking 25mg of Zoloft a week ago but it is not helping me yet. Here is how I feel.... I feel like I could stay in my nightgown and not ever leave the house again. I have no joy in anything that I do. I go to work and all I can think about is getting home and going to bed. I look forward to going to sleep. My husband is the only thing that makes me feel happy, I don't know where I would be without him. I have to go out into the world with a fake smile and act like everything is okay when it is not and when I have a conversation with people I have to fake the whole thing, I don't even want to talk to anybody, it feels like a chore. I feel like this is going to last for the rest of my life and it scares me to death. Pending Gloom over my head is the way I feel. If I had a thousand dollars to spend on whatever I wanted I feel like it would be a big chore just to go spend it, I would find no joy in it at all. I hate this feeling, does anyone else feel this way? I feel so alone.
6 people like this
18 responses
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
1 Mar 08
Is your doctor planning on raising your dose? I take Zoloft too but I'm on a 125mg dose. Of course how severe ones depression is, is a huge factor AND not all meds work for everyone..so if a higher dosage doesnt help (ask your doc if you can or will be going up) then maybe Zoloft isnt the right med for you and you might need to be put on something else... Also, are you doign any counseling at the moment? if not are you planning on it? Reason I ask is, meds HELP but whats more important is getting to the root of it all... do I feel that way...well like I said I'm on AntiDepressants as well and have been for going on 5 yrs come fall...I've suffered from severe depression my whole life starting when I was very young and getting steadily worse as the yrs went on and more trauma happened...Just know this.....it CAN change..and it WILL IF you want it to and are willing to work at it...Granted I will be on my meds until the day I die, thats no secret, the trauma that has gone on in my life is too extensive to believe otherwise HOWEVER life is great now..I've conqured many of my past demons and have learned through tons of reading and therapy how to not only manage and cope differently but also how to turn the negatives into positives....its not easy to do at first...but its SO WORTH IT....
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Mar 08
I checked myself into a crisis center in December and they had me on 75mg of zoloft, it made me too sleepy to get thru the day, I have been on prozac, and cymbalta which also made my too sleepy. I had been on zoloft in the past 50mg, for about six years, but my depression has worsened. I was going to up it to 50mg starting tonight. I did go to therapy back in December, I had an obsession with my hair and went into a panic attack at work over it, so that is when I checked myself into the center. I am over my hair problem now. I know I need to talk to someone and I am going to the doctor today for a cold and I am going to tell her. but that still does not take away the feeling of this depression and the way it makes me feel so sick like I can't even get dressed. That is the part I really hate. I feel so weak. I don't know I sound so confusing to myself. I have had terrible thing happen to me in my past but I never dwell on them and I don't feel like that is what is causing this depression. Belive it or not my life is very happy. I just can't feel anything. Besides the love for my husband and family. Other than that I feel nothingness. I do feel guilt for feeling this way though, like I am causing problems for everyone, like I am a burden. I have done the positive thinking thing but it is not working because I feel so sick that it is not letting me even think about being positive, am I making any sense? Well I'm sorry I sound so negative but I am all about telling the truth and I can not fake being happy when I am not. Thank you for the comment and I will try and set up an appt. to go talk with someone, I am just kinda short on any extra money right now.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
1 Mar 08
OH as for the lacking cash thing..I can relate to that too..its actually why I stopped goin a couple yrs back because we couldnt afford to pay the copay for myself, my husbnad and both my kids so I backed out in order for them to be able to go...until you can afford to go even just once or twice a month there are other options..
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Mar 08
Hi Ravenladyj,Thank you for your post, I do take my meds at night but they seem to stay in me throughout the day. I just took my 50mg a few minutes ago. When I said I felt like a burden I do beat myself up all the time, no one ever tells me I am a burden except myself. When you said I could PM you to vent, this may sound stupid but what does PM mean. I would like a place to vent my feelings. I cry all the time and after I cry it makes me feel somewhat better for a few minutes anyway. I am 42 years old I thought maybe it was my hormones making me feel this way, but I had a blood test done and everything came back normal. Well I better get back to my husband now so I feel good. I appreciate everyone support. Thank you, Lora
1 person likes this
@filmbuff (2909)
• United States
2 Mar 08
I know exactly how you feel, I feel the same way. Hopefully the zoloft will help, it takes 2-3 weeks for it build up in your system before it takes full effect. I hope it works out for you, and you are not alone, others feel the way you do and people (like your husband, friends, family and coworkers) care about you.
1 person likes this
• Canada
2 Mar 08
I am so depressed that I can't even deal with this discussion. I wish I new the magic answer. Does anyone know?
1 person likes this
@mrsjbelle (1640)
• United States
2 Mar 08
I do Lora and it is the most scary feeling. I wish I could just be normal. I always feel like Im waiting for the other shoe to drop. People say I push them away. Im glad your on meds they usually take about 6 weeks to have an effect is what I was told so hang in there darling.
@anniem72 (50)
• United States
2 Mar 08
I can relate to what you're feeling. I've been feeling down lately. I don't feel like getting out of bed. I feel like sleeping all day. I feel drained and I don't feeling like talking to anyone. I have been depressed off and on since I was a teenager. I had a hard life growing up and I'm still faced with some of the same obstacles from my younger years. I'm sick and tired of feeling this way. It's very frustrating.I just want a peace of mind. I too feel alone. I'm single and my family are busy with their own lives and I really don't have anyone else to talk to about my depressed state. I think part of my feeling this way is due to not having a companion. I do long for one.
1 person likes this
@anniem72 (50)
• United States
2 Mar 08
I know exactly what you're talking about. I been feeling the same way lately. I don't want to leave the house. I just want to stay in bed all day. I don't feel like talking to anyone. I feel so drained. I also feel very alone.I'm single and my family are busy with their own lives.I too hate feeling this way.
1 person likes this
@reeseyj (906)
• United States
1 Mar 08
I have had depression since the age of 5 because of a traumatic experience but it sounds like you have the kind that can go away after awhile. The pills I take is wellbutien 150 mg slow release not the xl. I can enjoy things now with these pills and see things like outside as being buetiful wich I could not see before and I'm not leaving my husband every 5 minutes.I still have depression, everything stills scares me like airplanes and I will not drive a car but I am a lot happier and can make rational decisions. It can take a month or to for your pills to work so hang in there.
@itsmepinky (1300)
• India
2 Mar 08
i have been in depression since the last five years & i have been taking antidepressants ever since then & visiting the docs since then. The main reason for my depression is my health which doesnt allow me to work or even function normally like a normal person.I cant even shop like a normal person , forget abt looking after my family or friends. I had to sacrifice my entire career bcoz of dis & i can actually identify wid the way u feel. i jus avoid people & lock myself in a room & whenever it goes over my head i just try n put myself to sleep. but i feel i am partially out of this phase since i have a gud bf who is understanding. Dont worry this phase shall pass soon.
@shaggin (71659)
• United States
2 Mar 08
You arent alone in your problem millions of people have depression do not feel it is just you! And it isnt your fault either! I've had bad depression since I was 11 or 12 and I am 24 now. I was put on zoloft at aroudn 16 or 17. I took it for a year and a half and did wonderful so was able to be taken off it. Then when I got pregnant with my daughter from all the crazy hormones the depression got really bad and I was having anxiety attacks so they have to put me back on zoloft. The doseage was 100mg. I currently take 150mg and that is considered a very high dose but its what works for me. It has been a god send. 25 mg is a very very small dose maybe after a little bit they can increase it and see if that helps.
@kaysue4 (951)
• United States
1 Mar 08
I have had depression for more years than I can remember. I used to be a cashier and I can relate well to what you are saying. Walking out of the house is like going to a stage and you have your smiles and false talk of everything being alright when it is far from it. Over the years though, my depression has gotten worst. The doc can't find a medication that really works on me with out me having bad reactions to them. I can't sleep at all at night, but for maybe a few hours. I have started taking St. John's Wort and it seems to be helping me a bit. It takes awhile for meds to start working, usually from 4 to 6 weeks. I have just come out of a really, really deep spell. I didn't want to leave the house, eat, or even deal with anyone in my family. Waking up was work half of the time. I have also added health issues that add to my depression. I am now a part of a wonderful online depression support group. My counceling is on hold because I used up all of my sessions last year. The place I go to had set that new rule by the end of October, only 20 sessions in a year! So now I can't go until July of this year.
@Crysi23 (515)
• United States
2 Mar 08
I took zoloft before and it lasted for awhile but the affects of it started to wear off. Than they tried celexa but that didn't help me at all. I'm now on cymbalta 60 mg. I take it during the day and it makes me feel really well. Cymbalta takes a little bit to get into your system and once it does I feel alot better. But it also took awhile for the zoloft to get into my system maybe its time to go up on the zoloft. How often do u see your doctor for meds? Are you in counseling to help with your depression?
@gemini_rose (16264)
1 Mar 08
I have suffered with depression on and off since having my first child at 18, I am now 34. I was on medication on and off until before I had my 3rd child and I hated it. The doctor figured my depression so deep that I was on really strong tablets that made me sleep and dribble. I got so sick of being on tablets, I just hated the fact that I was happy falsely because tablets just lulled me into a false sense of security. I came off them and decided that I would just deal with it, and I have done pretty well, I used to be able to tell when it was coming and I would deal with it and get myself out of it, but reading this discussion makes me wonder if maybe it has sneaked back on me because I am identifying with your feelings, I used to describe my depression as my big black cloud, I could feel it hovering over my head and I think that maybe it maybe on the horizon again. So you are not alone, hope things get better for you.
@MAG_1961 (62)
• United States
7 Mar 08
yes i know how you feel im 46 and its been like that for me for a very very long time ,somehow ive just learn to except that its just who i am,some. i hate it when people that dont suffer ,(and yes we do suffer ) from this make stupid statements like this "if you think negetive then negitive things will happen" that is such crap good luck i guess im not the one for helping huh
@besthope44 (12123)
• India
10 Oct 10
Well i take it every weekend and at during festival months i never miss vacations, that my best depression relieving out of mechanical life.
@getnbuy (1312)
• United States
2 Mar 08
The zoloft takes a couple weeks to help. In the meantime, find yourself a good therapist. Insurance often pays for mental health now. I have been in therapy for a year and I am a changed person. Learning to deal with stress has made all the difference in the world. Look for a therapist who uses the 12 step program(It works for everyone, not just addicts) and also co-dependance. These tools have helped me immensely.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
2 Mar 08
hon you are not alone, most of the time I feel that way too, and I feel like life is just not worth the living
@abg1988 (340)
• India
2 Mar 08
jus sit alone in a calm place and close ur eyes and do meditation... this will help you from getting depressed.
• United States
2 Mar 08
There are lots of people that feel exactly the same way as you do.I also suffer from depression and like you I will be starting on wellbutrin tomorrow.Your going to have to give the zoloft time to start working.It might even take a month or more to start working and if zoloft doesn't work for you then you'll have to try another one.Everyones system is completly different and what might work for one might not work for another.I will have to go through this trial and error myself to find out what works for me.Sleeping is what we do best because we have a hard time coping when we are awake.There is no joy and you don't feel like doing anything.Its a horrible place to be. I know all the symptoms.Just keep trying to get better and just go through the motions of life like getting out of bed,taking a shower,going to work,eating right.Just force yourself to do all the things you need to do until you get better.You will get better just hang in there because its going to take a little time.Depression runs in my family it seems and it effects me so I know all the problems and feelings,nothing is good,nothing is joyful,we can only think negitively,it really effects our thinking,we only want to sleep,we don't want to call anyone on the phone because we don't want to talk,we want to isolate ourselfs in our house. we feel no hope,and we feel bad about ourselfs and we have a hard time getting interested in a tv program,listening to music on the radio,you feel like your in a deep dark hole and can't get out,you feel like your going to be like this forever and you feel so all alone.All these feelings are normal for someone having depression.Everyone that has this depression feels this same exact way and there are many others who suffer with this.The problen is you have unbalanced brain chemicals.You are lacking a brain chemical or very,very low on seretonon ( i think thats how you spell it ) So that is the reason you are depressed.Seretonon is a feel good brain chemical.Taking an anti-depressant is to help you bring up the seretonon levels in the brain.So don't despair,when this brain chemical goes up you will start to feel better.