Dear Pro Life advocate...

@miamilady (4924)
United States
March 4, 2008 10:51am CST
Have you ever put any thought into what would happen in the world if you put all that time, energy and money that you spend on arguing against pro-choice beliefs into taking care of the children that have been born? The children who's parent did have them and then beat them, or abandoned them? Are YOU going to adopt the children of those parents cannot care for their children? Are YOU going to shelter the children whos parents gave birth to them but truly are unfit to be parents? Perhaps, if each and every one of YOU would take one of these children into your home and feed them and nuture them, the world we be a much better place. How many childre are out there waiting to be adoped? How many children are out there going hungry? Why don't we start helping the children who ARE HERE NOW and need help and then when all THOSE children are taken care of, perhaps THEN you can focus on the unborn childre whos parents can't or won't care for them.
15 people like this
22 responses
@asgtswife04 (2482)
• United States
4 Mar 08
I am pro life definitely and to answer your questions...I would take these children in in a heartbeat. There are thousands of people that would take these unborn babies in without even batting an eye, and there are thousands who would take in the other children that are already here and have been neglected as well. The thing about speaking out against mother's killing their children is that it is the Christ like thing to do. You have to speak truth into the world or your not doing your job. There is a song by Ray Boltz called, " What was I supposed to be". It's a song about all the unborn children. it's an awesome song and should be listened to by everyone even considering having an abortion. I would personally love for it to be heard while you were in the process of killing your babies. it would definitely make any decent human being think about what they were fixing to do. I know i know, what if the girl was raped or what if the choice of either the baby or the mother living without having an abortion? First, if i was raped and didn't feel like i could handle looking at that sweet baby due to flashbacks, i would give the baby up for adoption. that baby didnt do anything wrong nor did it ask to be concieved. Everything happens for a reason. if it were to come down to me or the child living, then i would just have to have faith that God would either save the both of us or that the one that was supposed to go on living would have a great testimony to share with the world. it shouldn't be our decision that decides the fate of a child or an adult, but God's decision. He knows His plans for you and sometimes you just have to believe in that and go on. I have heard many stories where doctors said either the mother will die or the baby will die and after much prayer and faith, both lived. You can't always base everything on word of mouth. thanks and God bless
5 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
4 Mar 08
"I would take these children in in a heartbeat" Hhmm so how many have you adopted so far? "if i was raped and didn't feel like i could handle looking at that sweet baby due to flashbacks" it isnt about flashbacks AFTER the baby is born...its about DURING the pregnancy...I'm going to assume you have never been raped..I have and I would abort in a NY minute..Kudos to the women who do go through with it..but some of us just arent able to because the trauma of the rape is SO overwhelming ""What was I supposed to be". It's a song about all the unborn children. it's an awesome song and should be listened to by everyone even considering having an abortion. I would personally love for it to be heard while you were in the process of killing your babies"" That could have been played while I was having my abortion and I wouldnt ahve heard a thing (they put you under)..even if it were to be played just before it wouldnt have phased me..why? because first off I can't stand Christian music and secondly just the title alone would make me think of the baby I'd just buried which is why I aborted in the first damn place. "if it were to come down to me or the child living, then i would just have to have faith that God would either save the both of us or that the one that was supposed to go on living" sorry, that would be UNACCEPTABLE for me...I have other children to care for so "taking a chance" wouldnt even be an option..They come first and foremost and again it was partly THEM that made me choose to abort (the other part was my husband and his well being)
4 people like this
• United States
4 Mar 08
AMEN,asg! You said it so very well! Every child has the right to life and only GOD Himself decides whether the child should live or die and be with Him. I need to listen to that song by Ray Bolz. I'm sure it is great. I sang his song, "Thank You" last September for a special service at church honoring my mom for her dedication to the Lord and the church. He is good! Let's stop the murder! God bless you! :)
2 people like this
• United States
4 Mar 08
Actually ravenlady, i have been raped before. Fortunately, I didn't get pregnant, but even if i had i would have had the baby. it's not the babies fault that there are sick perverted people in the world. and thank you springlady! your words were very kind and are much appreciated. God bless
3 people like this
• United States
4 Mar 08
By the same token have the pro-choice people ever had an abortion? Have you ever seen the devastation that some women feel during and afterward? I knew one woman that 15 years after the abortion she was still mourning the child. She had two dates a year to mourn the abortion and the expected due date or "birth day". Or have you ever talked to a child who was neglected or abused? Do we ask them if they would rather not have been born? I think all the cards should be on the table for this discussion from every perspective. Then we can truly know the impact of abortion not just our own beliefs or what we think is right or not. I would love to hear from more women who have had an abortion and what they think about it. I think even Dave Pelzer is glad to be alive and anyone who has read his story knows abuse doesnt get much worse. We need to quit fighting each other and talk about what is real, the feelings of those who have done it and the feelings of those who by the above description should have been aborted? Then maybe we get a full picture of the truth of abortion.
4 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
4 Mar 08
"By the same token have the pro-choice people ever had an abortion?" Yes I have and if in the exact same situation I would do it all over again... As for Dave Pelzer....you can't compare two ppls traumas..what he (and ultimately his brother) went through was horrific, no doubt about that BUT that doesnt make MY personal abuse story any less horrific or the next persons...pain is pain and we all process it, react to it etc etc differently so to say that one persons abuse case was more horrible or devastating than anothers etc just isnt logical...
3 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
4 Mar 08
"I think all the cards should be on the table for this discussion from every perspective" sorry brainf@rted and didnt finish what I wanted to say.....I agree that all the cards should be put on the table BUT the problem with that is so many ppl are SO set in their ways (especially PL's who refuse to look beyond the act of abortion and into it deeper)...I came from an abusive home and was adopted as well and I can say that before havingn kids of my own and then getting on the road of survival/recovery etc YES I wish I'd been aborted...I also know several other ppl who come from terrible childhoods who feel the same way..but even that isnt a black and white thing....I imagine even Pelzer had those times BEFORE his healing when he wished he'd never been born..tis a natural reaction/response when you come from hell..
3 people like this
@mummymo (23709)
5 Mar 08
Shewolf can I comment? I had an abortion almost 20 years ago and of course I mourn that child and wonder what it would have been like and what would have become of us, I really do but I also mourn the children I lost at very early stages of pregnancy. That said life has to move on and I prefer to try to celebrate the children I have and provide them with a good life and help them to become the best they can be! i also wanted to say how sorry I was that you suffered in that way and that I admore the way you have raised our children in what must have been very difficult circumstances! xxx
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
4 Mar 08
*chin hits the floor* BRAVO MIAMILADY!!! BRAVO!!! that is a FABULOUS post!! And to those Pro Lifers who say they WOULD do something..my question is this..What exactly are you doing NOW to help all the children miamilady just mentioned... Its all fine and well to SAY you'd do something, but its completely different to actually DO IT...What are you waiting for??
3 people like this
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
4 Mar 08
this sounds like a very good plan for there is alot of people out there that cant have children might then turn their minds to adopting.
3 people like this
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
4 Mar 08
The book of Proverbs chapter 6 and verse 16 through 19 says, "These six things the Lord hates, yes, seven are an abomination to him: A proud look, A lying tongue, HANDS THAT SHED INNOCENT BLOOD, A heart that devises wicked plans, Feet that are swift in running to evil. A false witness who speaks lies, And one who sows discord among brethren."
@cynddvs (2950)
• United States
4 Mar 08
It's so easy to bring bible verses into this kind of discussion. But are these bible verses really solving anything. Are they adopting all of these children that are up for adoption that noone wants? I'm a christian but there's nothing I hate more then bible verses being spit out with no solutions behind them.
2 people like this
• United States
4 Mar 08
Same thing goes for the people bombing places like Planned Parenthood like I mentioned in my post below. They talk about how wrong abortion is and how it's murder, yet they find it right to kill innocent people. I don't think they even realize that the girls are most likely there for other things that have NOTHING to do with abortion and aren't there for an actual abortion. *rolls eyes* Makes no sense to me!
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
5 Mar 08
Well I do not think that it is right to do any of that. Don't picket the abortion clinic, don't blow up plan parenthood. None of that stuff is going to do any good. People are going to find a way to do what they want to do. All I intend to do is pray. If the Lord leads me to adopt children, I have no problem doing that. I have the ability to love any child as if it were my own. All I was trying to say is that abortion should not be an option, just like picketing and blowing up places should not be an option. I speak the truth of the word of God. It do not care what people do not care to hear. God did not sugar coat the word and I will not do it either. That is the whole problem with the world today. They do not know the truth any more, they don't know what the word of God has to say about these issues. My Bible tells me to go out into all the world and preach the gospel. I know that there are many that will not want to hear it. That is not my problem. Nor will it stop me from declaring the truth. If you don't like it, take it up with God. I did not write it, I am just the messenger.
2 people like this
@IddiKlu (176)
• United States
5 Mar 08
You are absolutely correct. I have always been appalled at the 'prolifers' (what an oxymoron!) only being interested in the wellbeing of the unborn. As soon as they are born, the pros could care less. Personally, I would rather have been aborted by my parents, than be born into a world hostile or indifferent to me. And feeling that way, think that people that don't want children should in fact be encouraged and helped if necessary NOT to have any (for the childrens' sake!). Not that I am FOR abortion, but I think that its effect often is more beneficial than destructive for the above reasons.
2 people like this
@IddiKlu (176)
• United States
5 Mar 08
You obviously did NOT read my post carefully enough. To reiterate, I was NOT born into a world that was hostile or indifferent to me. (It only turned into that I after i grew up... ;-) ) Just kidding!
2 people like this
@cortjo73 (6500)
• United States
4 Mar 08
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! That is exactly how I feel! I am pro-choice. Not pro-abortion, not anti-abortion. Pro-lifers seem to think that those of us who believe in choice are "Pro-abortion". It isn't about that! It is about what is best for each individual person. Why can't they see that? Why can't they understand that all we are saying is that we don't believe in forcing our opinion on abortion on everyone else. It should be up to me whether I decide to have an abortion or not. No one else! It is my freaking body. So, in addition to putting all of their rally crying energy into screaming at the pro-choicers into helping those that are already in the world instead, they should also put some energy into opening their closed minds. It would do them, and the world they are stomping around in, a lot of good!
2 people like this
@cynddvs (2950)
• United States
4 Mar 08
I agree pro choicers are very misunderstood by pro lifers. It's not like we're going around telling everyone "Hey go get an abortion". In my case I would never have an abortion unless my life were at risk during a pregnancy or unless I got pregnant due to rape. So for myself I am pro life. But I believe everyone deserves the right to do what they want with their bodies. Who am I to tell them they can't have an abortion just because I wouldn't?
2 people like this
@cortjo73 (6500)
• United States
4 Mar 08
That is pretty much the same with me. I wouldn't have an abortion unless my life depended on it or I conceived during rape. But, that is as an adult. I am responsible and am in a position to take care of a child. Back when I was young, if I were sexually active (which I wasn't) and accidentally got pregnant, I would probably have had an abortion back then for that reason. I just can't judge others for their decisions. That is what being pro-choice is about. And, really...we are all pro-choice no matter what side of the fence we say we sit on. Some choose to to disagree with abortions. Some choose to agree with them. That is called choice! Pro-Choice!
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Mar 08
I am pro-life and I have two adopted sons, who are all grown up. The reason that we cannot take in all the children is that the social services has RULES. They know what parents are best for what child and although you want the children who are of mixed race, blacks, Native Americans, have mental or physical disabilities. Would you want children who have a chronic medical conditions to be adopted by parents who have no medical knowledge and who cannot afford a nurse to come in to check the child up, and the child die? There are parents who sponsor a child overseas, who help out at hospitals and hospices, but what about YOU? Are you helping out these poor children, giving your time and money to these causes? Do you put money in the collection plates for the poor at home and abroad? If there is a speaker on the people of Sudan who are getting murdered? Do you send a check? Or do you say, let the pro=lifers do it because those children did not deserve to be born. The only way you are wanting us to do more is so there will be no one to protest at the abortion clinics, no one to write letters protesting the killing of the unborn, no one who will stop you, because if you get your way, those who are against pro abortionists will not have any time.
2 people like this
@mummymo (23709)
4 Mar 08
erm excuse me but if you aren't allowed to foster or adopt children with medical problems unless you have medical experience then who is supoposed to look after them? Their parents have no medical experience most likely and if they live somehwere where they need to pay for medical treatment and can't afford it? What then who looks after their interests? Socail services? Give me a break. I speak as a mother and as the sister of a woman who has 3 adult natural children, 3 adopted from long term foster care and is STILL in foster care after 27 years and hundreds of children helped! She has a 14 year old adopted son still at home and 4 foster children , 2 of whom are special needs - do you know how difficult it gets to find people who are willing to take these children in and provide for their physical needs never mind their emotional ones and their thirst for love that they have never recieved! I am glad my foster nieces and nephews found my sister and love and care from our family! I think you confuse pro abortion and pro choice! If you are so full of love for these innocents then perhaps you could spare some of that for those who find themselves in impossible situations? There is good and bad in every walk of life and in every believe system and maybe if you took a step back you would see what Miamilady is actually saying and not go on the attack to defend yourself! You say killing of the unborn is so wrong and you need to protest and write and do not want to make yourself too busy to do that - why not do MORE good and protest on the ill treatment , abuse, torture and killing of those already born?
2 people like this
@Guardian208 (1095)
• United States
5 Mar 08
Interesting post miamilady, But honestly, everyone is missing the point by arguing the wrong arguement. Before I posted I did a bit of research into this. I got this info from a number of places, including the CDC. For those who argue that there are enough children waiting for adoption that all lifers should adopt first, here are the facts. There are currently 523,000 kids in the foster care system. Of those, 129,000 are eligible for adoption. Adoption figures average about 120,000 adoptions every year. The facts are that most eligible children are in fact being adopted. I believe that more people would adopt if the process was easier and the costs were lower. I private adoption can cost up to $30,000! For those of you that argue about carrying a rapists child to term, of all abortions in the US, approximately 1% are due to rape and incest. Here are the numbers: Rape/Incest = 1% Health of baby/mother = 7% So only 8% of abortions are due to uncontrolable circumstances. Here are the rest of the numbers: Unready/immature = 32% Doesn't want more kids = 19& Can't afford baby = 23% Relationship problems = 8% Interfers with career/education = 4% Other = 6% So 86% of all abortions are due to irresponsible use of birth control, or lack thereof. And in this I am speaking to men as well. We are both responsbile for this. One last bit if information. Approximately 60% of all abortions in the U.S. are women from households making more than $30,000 annually I thought that this might be of interest to you guys.
2 people like this
@eden32 (3976)
• United States
5 Mar 08
Well said Miamilady. I respect the feelings of prolifers, they're entitled to their beliefs & to act on them in any legal manner. But it would seem to me that a far better & more meaningful investment of the time & energy of a PLer would be in creating programs to help women who feel like terminating is their best option for lack of support. I am absolutely pro choice, but I feel for women who choose termination solely because they don't have the support they need to raise a child. IMO the only reason a woman should terminate is that she doesn't wish to be a parent at this time, not she would want to be if she had xyz need met- does that make sense?
2 people like this
@jpso138 (7844)
• Philippines
5 Mar 08
I do agree with you. Much time is wasted in arguing instead of working on things. Its actually the same here in our country. Many people go to rallies, the church seems to join in politics and a lot of politicians fighting against each other. Our senate alone is doing a lot of investigations similar to a court hearing and are spending thousands each day on expenses. My thinking, is if instead of using there time on this silly things and putting the money for good use, our country could have improve. Some street children could have been given shelter and food.
@SViswan (12072)
• India
5 Mar 08
Wow! That actually makes sense...though I wouldn't have thought of it that way. It's anyone's choice what they do with their pregnancy...the only time I do not condone abortion is when it is repeatedly done as the couple do not want a baby. Having said that, I would have taken more babies into my home if I could afford to. In fact, as of now, we are trying to make our financial situation better so that we can adopt. We feel there are too many kids out there who have no one to take care of them and we might as well take them in instead of adding to the number of children by having more of our own. But I know people like us are few in number. Very well said...and I loved your discussion!
2 people like this
@williamjisir (22904)
• China
5 Mar 08
Hello dear miamilady. Life will be much easier for those kids whose parents cannot take care of them within their ability. And it will be easier for those parents to support themselves by going to some training schools to learn more to help support them to find a good job later on. By the way, speaking of adopting a kid in China, I don't think that it is an easy thing because the couple would have to be proved that they have no child of their own before they could adopt one...
@mummymo (23709)
4 Mar 08
I cannot help but agree with this miamilady! For every protestor there are thousands of children being abused , neglected, abandoned or simply being sent from pillar to post in a care system that is often unequipped and understaffed with not enough money to look after the needs of the children they are responsible for! xxx
2 people like this
@dfinster (3535)
• United States
4 Mar 08
Excellent discussion and so well put. I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion don't get me wrong and I know this is a very touchy subject and I applaud you for bringing it up, because sometimes I feel it does need to be discussed. I guess I'll jump from the frying pan and into the fire here so here it goes. I agree with everything that you have said here. I have first hand had to deal with this situation and it's not an easy one for a person to deal with. But look at the news now. Each and every day we see stories of kids that are being horribly abused or killed by parents who can't deal with the fact that they have these children and it breaks my heart because I love kids so much. These little ones didn't choose to be brought into this world or choose the horrible upbrining and treatment that they are getting and I strongly believe that our society needs to concentrate more on caring for these children than if it was the right or wrong decision that their parents made.~D
2 people like this
@Poison_Girl (4163)
• United States
4 Mar 08
This is a good discussion. I'd also like to add something. I often wonder about those pro-lifers who bomb places like Planned Parenthood. What on earth goes through their minds? They go on and on about how abortion is murder, yet it's ok to kill a bunch of innocent peoples' lives? Innocent people who most likely at that Planned Parenthood NOT for abortion, but for other reasons like birth control or to get their check-ups and what not. I don't get it!
2 people like this
@cynddvs (2950)
• United States
4 Mar 08
This is so true! Pro life people spend some much time worried about the life of an unborn baby that they forget how many children are waiting to be adopted and some who never get adopted. If they spent a little more time trying to figure out ways to help these children that are already with us things might just be a little better.
2 people like this
• United States
9 Mar 08
I wish to say, without making anyone mad, that there are things that I do agree with about this post. I do agree that we need to do more to help the children of the world. Education is lacking in major funding, children who belong to deteriorating, abusive homes don't belong there and more needs to be changed within the system in order to get them out of there. I knew a girl who was given a "second chance" when it was more like her 4th to make things right in order to keep her children in her care...And when Child Services walked up and granted her another chance, they pulled up to find her 1 and 1/2 year old son standing out in the street by himself in a diaper while she was inside asleep, completely unaware that he had wandered outside because she had been up all night playing on the computer...Sickening...That's beside the point, what I'm trying to get at is yes, the children of NOW need to be helped NOW. But on the other side of the argument, while I am not one to agree with abortion as far as myself is concerned, it is not an act that I would ever follow through with, I am not one in place to judge another for committing such an act themselves. For one, we have not walked a mile in their shoes and experienced what they have felt. I am not going to use arguments such as rape, teen pregnancy, and lives at risk as there are many that already have and it is a constant argument that goes back and forth. One side says that, another side says another thing...So I won't even bother to touch on it as others have. I will have ended up making no point what-so-ever. The arguments that I will pose is, while I am all for adoption instead of abortion, I do not believe that abortion should be made illegal and unavailable to women who choose to go that route. For one, we are breaking a part of the Constitution by doing this...we are taking away that which this Country fights so desperately for and that is the freedom to make our own choices. It is a woman's choice....Granted, that is an age old argument as well...Another argument that I have, for anyone that says that they are a Christian, they should understand this comment. I was raised in a Christian household and there were many people that we spoke with and that we were friends with that had gone through with abortions and such. Why did we befriend them? Because they were not bad people. Why were they not bad people? Because everyone knows that it is not our right to judge another. We were not granted that right. So to judge another for committing an action that you are against is honestly going against beliefs of a Christian. The other thing I would like to add to this, in the original starting post I realized that one argument that was stated was mentioning that if those who were Pro-Live Advocates were to take their time helping the children of now instead of expelling that energy towards being Pro-Choicers that perhaps things would be better for the children of now. Not trying to be rude or mean in any way shape or form but the same goes for Pro-Lifers as well, if you would take the amount of energy that you use arguing your views with others and put it towards helping children that have been born, perhaps things would be different. Things like that work both ways you know. It's almost pointless to fight over who is right. The circumstances will always be the same. Those who agree and those who disagree. And even if it were made illegal, the more you try and prohibit an action, the more people press to find ways of committing that action anyway. I hope you all have a good day and realize that we are all on this Earth together whether we agree or disagree so for those of us that are here, why don't we all just make it the best that we can in the time that we each have left of our lives. Sleep Sweet MyLotters...I'm off for the night.
• United States
11 Mar 08
"...everyone knows that it is not our right to judge another. We were not granted that right. So to judge another for committing an action that you are against is honestly going against beliefs of a Christian." Thank you! This is a point I always try to make as well. I've noticed that the more religious a person or group is, the more judgmental they seem to become. I'm not saying this is true for ALL religious people, but it's just an observation I've made with a lot.
• United States
12 Mar 08
Hey, thanks. I always speak the truth and what's on my mind. I just think that it's pointless, as I said already, to fight over what we disagree on as one group will never be able to change the mind of the other group and vice versa. That's just the way it is. Agree to disagree I guess and move on. Maybe then we can concentrate on trying to at least live peacefully. Thanks though, hope you have a good day.
1 person likes this
@anniepa (27242)
• United States
5 Mar 08
Awesome, excellent, magnificent post and so beautifully said! I agree with you totally and that's why I always dispute the use of the "pro life" label. As you said, if you're pro-life start helping the children that are here now, very much alive and born. Life doesn't end once the fetus becomes a living, breathing infant, that's just the beginning and we're letting these kids down terribly. Thank you for starting this discussion. Annie
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
5 Mar 08
What of the people that do help those that are here now? Oh that's right, they don't exist. Not only that, the discussion is actually a large display of sham language in my view. I will agree with your other points on how we are letting kids down terribly in adoption though.
2 people like this
@anniepa (27242)
• United States
7 Mar 08
Gee, Pro, is this directed at me? I don't get where that's coming from if it is. I've certainly never said there aren't plenty of people who do good or any of what you've alleged here. Annie
@shannon76 (1234)
• United States
6 Mar 08
I guess the day that women stop using abortion as a birth control method will be the day that I give up the fight. But, since that ain't happening anytime soon.... Have you ever thought, you meaning any pro-choice advocate, about what would happen to the world if you stopped using abortion as a birth control method? Have you ever thought about fighting harder for birth control and for sterilization for woman that do not want children? Adoption isn't for everyone and just because I fight the good cause for pro-life doesn't mean I could and should adopt all the orphaned and abused children out there. I do however, think that all these darn celeb's should be adopting from here instead of elsewhere....
1 person likes this
@anniepa (27242)
• United States
7 Mar 08
Absolutely, most pro choice advocates do push for better education about birth control and for it to be more accessible and affordable. I don't buy the using abortion as a birth control method and never will, not in any kind of large numbers. It's not a fun and easy - nor cheap - thing to do and considering it's often poor women who have abortions I have to ask how do they pay for them over and over instead of taking the pills or using other methods they can sometimes get for free or low cost? It's some on the religious right who actually state birth control is a form of abortion and are only for abstinence education you should be giving this advice to. Annie
1 person likes this