adults acting like kids

@winterose (39918)
Canada
March 8, 2008 9:57am CST
I have a friend that thinks if she fights with some that I automatically have to fight with that person too. na a it doesn't work that way for me, I can still be friends with both people, I have no issues with the person she is fighting with, she thinks I am not loyal, to her but loyal about what? because she she choices not to talk to someone, why does that affect me, I get along well with the person, and friend or no friend I will not be manipulated by anyone. what are your thoughts, do you think it is childish like I do that a friend she expect you not to talk to the people she doesn't talk to or you agree that friends have to be loyal, however if you are loyal to this friend then in that sense you have betrayed the other and that is just not right in my books. now I want you to answer this, you, don't say what I meaning me should do this question is about you the reader.
3 people like this
9 responses
@jewel76 (2305)
• Canada
8 Mar 08
In a high school clique, maybe it'd work that way; in order to be loyal to your "clique" you shouldn't talk to people they don't talk to...even though i personally think it's ridiculous. There's enough fighting in this world, why fight with people we have nothing to fight about with, just cause someone else is in a fight with them?? It is childish. I'd tell my friend who's in a fight with the other friend what you've told your friend, that i have no issues with that person, therefor i can talk to her/him and besides, i am free to talk to whomeve i want, right?
2 people like this
• United States
9 Mar 08
Well,it all depends on the situation for me because, If somthing happend,say this friend did somthing i dont want to be around or involved with, even though she didnt tell me about it and my other friend told me she told her she did it. i would still not wanna be associated with what she did.there for i would not be hanging with her or talking to her. Now if she did somthing like just get into an argument or somthing with your other friend and your other friend decided she didnt wanna talk to her anymore, thats on her. because this friend did not argue with you, never did anything to you so why does she deserve the cold sholder from you. i am one person. i make my own choices and think my own thoughts.
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
9 Mar 08
that is exactly what I am talking about a stupid argument that has nothing to do with me or anybody else, there is no reason why I should lose one of my friends over that, that is between the two of them.
@ellie333 (21029)
9 Mar 08
I call this sort of behaviour playground stuff and I won't be a part of it. I have friends from all different walks of life and I wouldn't expect all of them to get on, some in fact don't but just because they don't like each other, I like them both and spend time with each of them. I will not mention the other when I am with one and vice versa, that way I can't get caught up in their arguement. I would never end a friendship with one just because another felt I ought to because of their prejudice, no way. I am big enough to make my own decisions about people. Ellie:D
1 person likes this
@ESKARENA1 (18299)
9 Mar 08
some people just do not grow. It is not always possible for us to develop at the same rate, the certainties of childhood somehow stay with some of us longer than others blessed be
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18118)
• United States
9 Mar 08
I have been in these situation more often then I wanted to be. I still talked to the other person though. It is hard to choose between to good friends. I try to stay out of the way of their bickering though and I won't talk to them about the fight except to let them get it off their chest. What else is there to do especially if you want to remain friends with both just don't talk about the other is my motto cause when you all become friends again it will be just hanging there in between everyone about who said what. So I stay out of it and let them settle it between them. I have encountered a few who who got mad and then wouldn't talk to me either but what the hay can't win them all. It can be emotionally draining when two opposite friends fight and your stuck in the middle.
1 person likes this
@aretha (2538)
• United States
9 Mar 08
i have never had someone do this to me but i have choose to not to be friends with someone because of what they did to another friend just because the things she did was totally not called for and mean. i just didn't want to be friends with anyone that ciould do this to anyother person.
1 person likes this
@SHAMRACK (8532)
• India
9 Mar 08
Dear Winterose, I have not faced any like that, still there are friend who act like child or kids but some times I do like that and feel funny. Still I talk to others even if my friend has some dislike towards him if possible I would like to solve that dis likeness too. I do hope they have to bit mature to come of their childish behaviors or acts. But I hope their intellectual part may not be effected. I do like be friends with everyone unless I find it unable to tolerate.
1 person likes this
@raydene (9874)
• United States
8 Mar 08
Aww I know what you mean I have a couple of THOSE friends also Another thing the same people do is want you to condone whatever they do even if it's wrong just because they are doing it! I agree Doll.. Wish to hel1 they would grow up lol xoxoxoxoxoxo
1 person likes this
@pumpkinjam (5801)
• United Kingdom
8 Mar 08
I don't have that trouble now. I used to just be friends with whoever wanted to be my friend because I didn't have many. That was more at school though and there were times when one or more friend would decide they didn't like one of us and expected everyone else not to like that person. Now, I thought it was ridiculous as a child but as an adult, I think it is really bad. I understand there may be times when true friends are concerned about other people. If I have been in a situation like that, I would never ask my friend not to be friends with the other person but I would give my opinion about them so my friend could make up their own mind. To me, any friend who asks you to choose between them and another friend (without good reason) is not a true friend.
1 person likes this