Okay to be Attracted to Someone Else if you are Already Married?

@deepti15 (1190)
India
March 20, 2008 12:03am CST
My response this discussion would be Marriage is a legal and social situation. Attraction is an emotional event. The way emotions seem to me, they're not logical. (You can't logically choose to love someone and not love another.) So since attraction is not subject to logic, 'tis not a matter of choice. It's neither OK nor wrong, it just happens. What you do about the attraction is another thing. Attraction happens; your behavior is yours to control. What would u advice or have to say if someone feels attracted towards somebody even if he/she is married.
5 people like this
8 responses
@subha12 (18453)
• India
20 Mar 08
Look we can't always control our emotions. it is a known factor.if one is already married and get attracted to some, it is ok till there is nothing more than that.But if due to this attarction, there is problem in married life, then obviously not ok.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Apr 08
Being attracted is one thing, acting on it is another. As long as you don't act upon it it is okay. The problom comes up when all you want to do is have an affair with this person.
@apsara60 (6612)
• Israel
27 Mar 08
There is no end to human desires, no matter male or female, whether married or not married. Some things just happen and we cannot control it. Unmarried people have choice to choose what they want, but married people have to keep self control on their feelings, specially if they are also parents.......A successful marriage his based on trust, patience and sacrifices and that is why it is a sacred relationship. I respect all those people who sacrifice their personal desires to make a healthy family. Nice discussion deepti.
@dpk262006 (56104)
• Delhi, India
27 Mar 08
Yes, attraction is temporary and it cannot be permanent. It is a natural human instinct to get attracted towards opposite gender. Attraction per se is not bad, but one should not cross the limits.
@vipulchawla (2220)
• India
27 Mar 08
As human beings we are bound to make mistakes. I don't think that you can ever control yourself from being attracted to someone of the opposite gender(ofcourse). Its a general human tendency with no regards to whether the other person is married or not else i would suggest to see a doctor...lol But ya.. its absolutely fine to develop an attraction towards another person unless and until you develop a liking for that person. Attraction is like infactuation which remains for a small period of time and vanishes. But if you develop a linkg for that person, its going to harm you personal life. personally talking, i do get attracted to married ladies, of around my age because of the sense of maturity they show. I like the way they dress. May be i have such views because i m still single. but i think i have the freedom to do so..
@samrat16 (2442)
• India
20 Mar 08
NO!!!! definetely not. It sometimes happens that a person maybe attracted to someones else but it is NOT ok. That person needs to consider the seriousness of the situation and what may happen. The marriage bonds are holy and binding. They represent a commitment of Love and Life to another person. No one has the right to interfere with that bond between two people. The exact same applies whether you are married and attracted to some one else or you are not married and attracted to a married person!!! The person who is attracted needs to realise this and BACK OFF!!!
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
20 Mar 08
if its infatuation then i think its okay, but more than that would cause harm. i think this person who is married should remember that she/he is married. that it is still normal to like someone but with limitations. if you get to much attracted it would really harm the married life. it is better not to dip feet to the pool so it wont get wet.
• United States
20 Mar 08
i would say, for the good of that persons spouse, it would be best to avoid the person he/she is attracted to, as to not allow these feelings to develop and break the heart of their spouse. if anyones argument to this is something like "what if you would have a better life with the other person" then really you shouldnt have gotten married already, and also if youre considering that then you cant really love your spouse and again, should not be married.