Give them an inch, they take a mile...or they run away?

@foxyfire33 (10017)
United States
March 20, 2008 10:25am CST
I have an old friend that I generally try to avoid. He seemed nice at first but the more I got to know him he seemed a bit domineering and wanted things his way all the time...plus he let me in on a few secrets he didn't want the general public to know and those secrets involved things I wanted no part in. So I basically broke ties with him but he still once in awhile contacts me. (I'm on his yahoo messenger list...I took him off mine 2 years ago). Normally all he'd really want to do is talk about himself and try to dig into my personal life. I usually just did everything I could to shut him down since no matter what I said led him right back into telling me he missed me and wished we could be more than friends (which makes me very uncomfortable). Last night he IM'd me for the first time in several months. At first I acted like I usually do...polite but uninterested. But that didn't seem to be doing anything but dragging the conversation out even longer. Finally I just jumped in with all kinds of personal details...my car, about me moving, the kids, what we've been doing lately, I even gave him the link to my myspace and told him to look at the photos I have on there.... ...nothing. The conversation ended, he never sent me a myspace friend request (which he would have to do to see my photos). So I don't get it...in the past if I gave him a lot of information he'd want even more, if I gave him the cold shoulder he'd press even harder...and now I give him all the information he wanted and he doesn't care. Maybe he finally got it through his head that there is no room in my life for him? Ever have a 'friend' act somewhat bizarre...or can you relate in anyway at least?
4 people like this
7 responses
@carmelanirel (21108)
• United States
20 Mar 08
No, but if you don't want him in your life, I believe Yahoo IM has a way to block him and if he does request you on myspace, they also have that option.
@foxyfire33 (10017)
• United States
20 Mar 08
Yeah that's probably what I'll have to do. I just thought it was weird how he lost interest when I did tell him stuff.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Mar 08
Now he has lost interest, but you never know, he may come back..I knew about this blocking because my daughter had an ex that was VERY pushy..
@miller1978 (1104)
• United States
20 Mar 08
I have the same problem as you however mine is an ex. I removed him from my yahoo shortly after I moved away because I didn't want anything to do with him. I even went as far as blocking him so he couldn't message me anymore. But later on he re added me through a different yahoo name and started harassing me asking me if I was alive and other personal things. I ended up having to change my email address and blocking him on my myspace page so he would leave me alone. The funny thing is he married some other girl like 6 months after I split and still has the nerve to contact me. All I can tell you is good luck and try some of the above mentioned things.
@foxyfire33 (10017)
• United States
20 Mar 08
Men are just strange I guess! This one will go months and months without trying to talk to be and then out of the blue a message would pop up as if we were best friends. And then he thinks our so called 'friendship' entitles him to know everything about me...another reason why I ended it in the first place was because he got mad when I didn't tell him all the details he wanted to know!
@Darkwing (21590)
21 Mar 08
This all sounds a bit quirky to me. I really think he enjoys a challenge, and that all the time you were giving him the cold shoulder, he was fine. However, when he thought you were going to tell him all, and let him into your life, he stopped enjoying the struggle. You might even have told him something he didn't expect... who knows how some of their minds work? If I were you, and I really wanted rid of him, I would start afresh. Block him on your existing Yahoo Account, and start a new one up, informing all your other friends of the change and leaving him in the dark. I have three Yahoo Messenger accounts, and can only be signed in to one at a time, so you could avoid signing into your current one, and just use your new one. Then, I'd start a new e-mail address under your new name, so that he couldn't contact you that way. Doubtless, if he can't find you through either of those avenues, he will try your Myspace, but he's not to know if you're still on the Internet or not, is he, so you can avoid any friends requests there, also. Close him down everywhere you can think of, and get rid of him. There's something here that's putting up warning signs, and you need to be careful. Good luck with this, and Brightest Blessings.
@cripfemme (7719)
• United States
21 Mar 08
Yes I totally can. A few years ago, a friend of mine told me about a friend of his whose wife was in a nursing home because she ahad a disability and his father was in another nursing home and he desperately wanted to get them both out. Of course I had to help. I let him and his wife move into my house temporarily, much to theh chagrin of my landlord, and they ended upstealing $80 from me and he totally flaked out and left her with no care at my house one night. The experience really scarred me and now I'm not as eager to be nice to people in need. He plays street music in a town near here that I sometimes go to and will call out to me on the street if he sees me. I am polite but don't really interact with him anymore
• United States
21 Mar 08
Foxy, This kind of alarms me. The fact that he didn't respond at all is weird. I think I would maybe make yahoo aware of this character, and seek their advice, since they are used to dealing with creepy people and situations. This is why I won't allow my children on the chat site esp. My Space, you just never know who you are dealing with.
@whittby (3073)
• United States
20 Mar 08
I think he sounds like trouble and you were right to cut him off before. And I can't imagine what's up with him after you gave him all the information, maybe he was so used to pestering you for every little thing that he's scared off temporarily now - mayabe he thinks you might be interested EWWW! Anyway, i would change everything you can think of so he can't find you. whit
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
20 Mar 08
Yes I had one like that and I blocked him totally of my Yahoo so he can not contact me anymore Things like that scare me and I block straight away I hope he leaves you alone now Sweetie as I know how scary that is