Traumatic labours?

@kezabelle (2974)
March 25, 2008 3:12pm CST
Ok so we all know labour isn't easy for one reason or another but we still go on to have more, how about labours that truely were traumatic do you ever get over it and go on to have more children? My first daughter the labour was easy but she was so distressed she wasnt breathing and had to be rushed to intensive care, as you can imagine this was really traumatic for both myself and my partner aswell as our families, I did have a long and lengthy discussion with my consultant as to why it happened and would it again, he assured me that it most likely wouldnt and not to worry. So we had our second, and again distressed born not breathing but she was much easier to bring round. This alone puts me off haveing any more as I think well we were lucky twice and what if.............next time. So can you ever really get over a traumatic birth or will it be with you forever?
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8 responses
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
25 Mar 08
Well my fourth was pretty traumatic for me...I'll try to give the shortest version possible. My first 3 had been easy so I was expecting the same with #4. It didn't turn out that way at all. Labor started around 9pm, we left for the hospital at 3am when I finally was having seriously painful contractions, the nurses hooked me to the moniotor and told me I wasn't having contractions because they weren't recording in the monitor, they said my doctor would probably send me home. My doctor came in at 8am finally, I told her the contractions were really bad but she believed the nurses and the monitor. She did decide I was close enough she'd just induce me by breaking my water (I was at 4cm) and give me pitocin. Naturally that all worked but the contractions were coming too often and too strong...she assumed that was because I was about to deliver within minutes and refused pain medication. So after more than 4 hours of that (and I was sick to my stomach with diarreah and those kind of cramps all at the same time! And dehydrated, hungry and exhausted)I was finally ready to push. The baby had tuned and had his head pointing towards my hip so 20 minutes of hard pushing with me having excruciating pain down my legs did absolutely nothing to get that baby out. She finally put the vacuum suction on his head and pulled...it popped off (the vacuum not his head lol). His heart rate dropped to 30 and she tried again. That time he came out and it felt like the rest of my insides came out with him! He was fine and is a healthy 5 year old now. My cervix and everything else was badly bruised and I took a lot longer to recover. But I had two very easy labors and deliveries since then so even though I remember every horrible detail of his birth, it didn't scare me bad enough to not want anymore. I am done now but that's because we have enough not because I'm scared.
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@kezabelle (2974)
25 Mar 08
Thanks for your response, that does sound really scary and painful too!!! See my labours were only 2hours 45 mins and 1hour 23 mins I was really lucky in that way but not in others id not change a bit of it though while the memories are still at times a little scary and upsetting too remembering my first born so ill, its memories that I have because of them so id not want to change that for one second
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@mbs730 (2147)
• Canada
26 Mar 08
I am so sorry this happened, wow... you have been through a lot! I also will not have anymore as I have 2. I had my tubes tied. The labor with my daughter went extremely well, first one and only 6 hours but with my son, it was very traumatic. First of all when the water broke it was green and I immediately panicked but the folks at the hospital said not to worry. They had to give me oxytocin with him because the contractions were still irregular and no progress was being made. But one OB was on call and he had to preform an emergency. Therefore they had to stop the labor and I was left sitting there and it was awful. But there were no signs of any kind of distress. Finally the OB was done and then they started the labor again, then when my son was born he inhaled meconium and ended up in the NICU for a week. He did recover but is under the autism spectrum. Wonder if genetics had something to do with it or that. But FORTUNATELY he is doing so well and will be okay. We should have sued.. but not sure what we would have gotten out of it :(
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@megs85 (3142)
• Australia
25 Mar 08
In all honesty I think I had relatively easy labours both times round. With my first son they had to break my waters and I was more upset about that then anything else, I couldn't handle the thought of them sticking some metal pole inside me to break something. As it was my waters were already broken so all they ended up doing was making a nice little cut on my son's head which he still has the scar from almost 2 years later. All up I was in labour with him for about 9 hours, and only actually pushed for about 30 minutes. My dramas came afterwards, when I had urinary retention which I hated. I'm still traumatised from that to be honest. To have a catheter at age 21 and be told it was there indefinitely was scary. With my second son, who was born in January of this year... I woke up at 1am with a little pain, and felt a little trickle. We got to the hospital at about 2.30, after some last minute packing etc, and he was born at 4.31am, after 5 minutes of pushing. In those five minutes I wasn;t actually pushing for about 2 because he had the cord wrapped tightly around his neck. He was taken to special care, but in the end was fine! My pregnancu with him was a nightmare3 though. He was actually originally atriplet, but I miscarried the other two at 8 weeks, and dthey werent sure whether he would make it or not. I also had antenatal depression, and pelvic instability which was sooo painful! All up I would say that things could have been much worse. Labour hurt, but nothing too dramatic, I didnt need an episiotomy, I had a first degree tear (nothing serious) and I had apethidine shot each time, and lots of gas! I thought the labours were actually quite short, my sisters first went for 23 hours! I think that once you hold your baby everything else just melts away. And you never know what will happen next time, it may go textbook perfectly!
• Philippines
25 Mar 08
Baby - Going in labor is painful but having to bring out a child into this world makes a woman complete.
I had a son who was caught on the umbilical cord it was choking him. I didn't have labor pains but it was over my due date and I had to have him induced. I was pushing and he was being pulled back inside. My Obstetrician had to cut the cord off while my little boys head was showing. It was a dangerous thing to do but I know they had to do it. I have 5 kids now and I don't care enough if labor hurts..It's what comes after the pain that I am after at.
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@maximax8 (31055)
• United Kingdom
25 Mar 08
My first labor was quite an easy home birth but afterwards I had a retained placenta and got taken off to hospital in an ambulance. That being removed was very painful it took me years to get over that. Twelve years later I had my second pregnancy. At 36 weeks I had a scan which showed my baby has spina bifida. I had a speedy home birth and then my baby was sent off to Intensive Care. It was a difficult and upsetting last month of my pregnancy and it was a relief for my baby boy to be born. He is now 10 months old and he has such a sweet smile. It takes years to get over a traumatic labor I think.
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@chrysz (1602)
• Philippines
26 Mar 08
I had eclampsia when I gave birth last August and I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism last November so until now, I am having complication with my recent pregnancy. My child was also distressed so they had to open me up, she had already deficated and she was already strangled by her umbilical cord. It wasn't easy for me but the joy of having myself and my child alive overrode the trauma I had felt while giving birth. I must not get pregnant yet or I might not only suffer eclampsia but worse, heart failure might cause my life so I am extra careful. I have two daughters now and I might try to have one more and hoping it will be a boy.
• United States
26 Mar 08
Im sorry to hear you had such a bad time with it. Im glad your girls are ok though. I had a tramatic experiance but not as bad as yours. With my first son everything went great through the pregnancy. He ended up coming 5 days after his due date. I went into labor and went to the hospital. All was good untill about 4 cent. He turned his head and got stuck. I was in severe pain, his vitals kept diping. They rushed me for an emergancy c-section. My poor husband {we were 19 at the time} got told to leave the room right now. He was basically pushed out. I was screaming. He was scared. They wouldnt tell him what was going on. They took me for the c-section and everything went well. Dad was able to she him after he was born. Poor baby had a big purple bruise around his head from the pressure of being stuck. After all that things were good. He was fine and so was I other than being in pain from the surgery. With my second things went a bit smother. I hade a planed c-section because I didnt want another tramatic experiance and I wanted the baby to be safe. Things went good with the baby but not me. They gave me to much seditive in my iv and I couldnt feel myself breath. I could only feel my face. Talk about scary. I started freaking out. The anastesiologist rubed my cheak and told me I was ok. He was watching my vitals and I was breathing fine. He rubed my cheek the whole time. That calmed me down. When the baby was born he peed on the doc. LOL! I went to recovery and dad got to be with the baby. After I came to I was very itchy. I had a reaction to the medicines. They gave me something in my iv and that went away but now I was throwing up. Bad and it hurt my belly to do so. I do remember I was nursing him and felt the urge to yack. I told my dad to get the bucket and told my mom to take him. Shes like Take him? I said yes TAKE HIM! I have to throw up. She does and when he released me he made a pop sound and was still sucking. LOL! They ended up giving me something for the throwing up as well. By the second day I was feeling much better. I guess you never really get "over" it you just learn to accept with it. Im thankfull everyday that my boys are great and me too. It could have been alot worse.
@ciades (1623)
• Philippines
26 Mar 08
A woman has a 50 50 of her life in times of labouring. Meaning its risky and dangerous. So, it can't avoid to be traumatic. Just pray and be healthy in bringing a child into your womb.