How to resolve common relationship problems and get your love life back

@ellie26 (4139)
Malaysia
April 6, 2008 1:33am CST
Most couples argue from time to time. It’s not the amount of conflict, but how one handle it. Destructive behavior, such as yelling, shouting, or withdrawing, is not appropriate. You need to develop a constructive conflict style. Here are some tips that might just work if you put your effort to it: 1. Respect each other. Speak and behave respectfully toward one another. Don't humiliate or put your partner down, especially in public. When you speak with each other, speak as you did when you first started dating. 2. Show appreciation of one another. Say "thank you," and "I appreciate that you . . . ." It lets your partner know that he or she matters. 3. Be realistic. Thinking your mate will meet all your needs — and will be able to figure them out without your asking — is a Hollywood fantasy. Ask for what you need directly. 4. Recognize that the two of you are different, come from different families, and have been raised differently. Rather than getting annoyed or assuming that your partner doesn't care, open up and be receptive to learn about your partner's different way of doing things. 5. Use humor. Learn to let things go, and enjoy one another more. Have fun! How many of us genuinely able and willing to do all these?
2 people like this
4 responses
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
6 Apr 08
I think that I'm able to do all that you list down should I be in a relationship. That's because personally for myself, I believe in communicating, appreciating one another and also saying thank you graciously whenever my partner does something truly appreciative for me. Another thing is that when I used to have a girlfriend, I love to humor her and made her laugh all the time with my silly jokes and banter. Lastly I don't believe in in using force such as violence against her will and to slap or hit her. I really am not such a guy and I hate guys who do that to their love ones.
@ellie26 (4139)
• Malaysia
6 Apr 08
You are a gentleman indeed. That is what we all supposed to have in a relationship. As human beings, we have feelings and causing pain to one another is something that everybody should not do and never do.
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
8 Apr 08
Thank you so much, sweetie for putting me under best response... I think that's just my nature for being a guy .. I wouldn't want to do something to hurt anyone, a lady particularly ... keepin' touch ;)
1 person likes this
@ellie26 (4139)
• Malaysia
8 Apr 08
Thanks for adding me as your friend. Happy posting.
1 person likes this
• India
6 Apr 08
what ever you said was right what if your partner attitude changes as time passes on? my partner dont have time for me..what shoud i do ..because somewhere in my mind i doubt him eventhough i want to trust him ...but i am unable to do... the reason is his past and also my past because in my past relation i was betrayed by my partner so from that i couldn't trust anyone...and communication is the very low basicaly because my partner doesn't like me talking about other guys.thats the reason we usually talk about only ourselves atleast me but honestly he tell me about everything i mean what ever he spoke to other girls he meet ...what should i do i f u can help please help
@ellie26 (4139)
• Malaysia
6 Apr 08
Yes, people change as they age, whether from bad to good or from good to bad. It all depends on us how we adapt to the changes. You should forget the past, enjoy the present and plan the future. Be open minded, be a good listener for him. And for yourself, you know him better, if you think you can talk to him about how you feel about certain things. then pick a good time and pour out whatever inside.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
7 Apr 08
i think all the points are very well written may be its the ideal way to sort out differences in life. i think all these are ideal situations. in many cases you are not able to stick to these all however hard you try to. i think both partner must abide by these.
1 person likes this
@Emma_Wang (210)
• China
6 Apr 08
yes, this is a good way to resolve the pronlem between people.
1 person likes this