But I don't want to live in an Old Age Senior Complex with a bunch of Old Peopl

@suspenseful (40193)
Canada
April 7, 2008 3:08pm CST
I do not feel old! All right, my husband is thinking of us getting a life lease in an Old Age or over 55 Senior apartment and I do not like the idea. Sure he had a small stroke, but I would rather either we stay where we are or get a nice place and travel. But if we get a life lease, I will wake up in the morning, and either fix breakfast, have our meals in, or go downstairs to a dining room full of Old People and the only younger ones are the ones that come to visit their dear old grandmother or grandfather or great grandmother, etc. I do not want to see people my age or older most of the time and these places are not near shopping centers. And then there will not be enough room for even the basics. Our house is already small as it is and our basement not finished yet. I do not want to move into a smaller place. I grew up in a small place and I hated it! Is there help for someone like me?
8 people like this
19 responses
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
7 Apr 08
keep what ya have till you no longer can look after yourself then and only then is it a time to go to the old folks place 60s isnt old I would say 85 might be old but then depends on your health at that age
3 people like this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
11 Apr 08
am sure you will find someone to do that. right now I have son in law do it but I have changed them and will do again specaily when I dont want to wait for him to do it.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
16 Jun 08
My grandmother-in-law feels the way I do. She has her own home and is in her eighties and she cannot understand people who are fifty five going into a seniors home or senior condos, because they have to pay fees and she loves being able to do what she wants and not have to go downstairs to see people who are younger and worse off. I like variety in ages and if someone treats me as older than I am, I get very angry.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
I will probably be going well into my nineties. And I certainly will not sit and vegetate. I might have to get the light fixtures changed because I am scared of heights and someone else has to change that kitchen bulb.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
7 Apr 08
I hate this im old crap..I am over 55 and i am not old..I keep my home and my yard and i walk,shop and do everything i always did...I plan to stay right here in my house..It sounds like just because your husband had a mini stoke he is wanting to hang it up and get old....No way will i EVER live in one of those senior homes...If i get so old that i cannot function then just shoot me....Yes i can help you out,tell your husband to go on and set himself up for his old age now but he will need to go alone..My husband is 63 and he acts like he is 100 years old..I am always going and doing and i am a busy person,if he wants to sit in his recliner and get old thats Him...He is not going to make me old with him...A man that acts like he is 100 years old does nothing for you except to make you old right along with him..I am not willing to do that,and it does not sound like you are either...Stand your ground suspenseful! you are still cleaning house,writing novels and on mylot,you are active girl so stay that way....Your husband needs to get out more and see the world and get some life into those bones....
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
At least these going to see the doctor and these appointments are a good excuse for him to get out as well as us shopping together. I can hardly wait until he gets back to fixing up the basement and then we can go to Home Hardware and start buying things. He has this set in way that at retirement you are old, but well us women never retire. There is still the house, cooking, cleaning, etc. and we find other things to do.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
My maternal grandmother lived in a house set out by the Lions, but it was like a regular house only smaller, but she was in her eighties when she went in, but now the Senior homes are like apartment blocks twenty or so stories high, not bungalows where you can walk out a few feet and you in the neighborhood. And now the senior complexes that have bungalows and duplexes are surrounded by fences so all you see are old people. I hope that when he gets his checkup, they give him some exercises and ways to keep him active so he forgets this stupid idea of going in a senior residence and die in ten years.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
11 Apr 08
well i think if you go to a senior home it will make you age quicker because you will not be doing all that you do now,you will only get lazy and go down hill....My dad went and got into one of these places,and he liked it at first but it soon got on his nerves seeing all these older people and he moved out and bought him a house and got married....He was much happier..You and your husband already have a home and to get rid of your home would be such a drastic ajustment...Also i would like to say something about these nursing homes...I understand that some people have to go because they have no choice but if at all possible it is always best to stay inyour own home...I hear people that think that when someone goes into a nursing home they end up dying real quick,well i don't think going there kills them ,they die because they give up and see no reason to live..As long as you have your own home and responsibilites it will force you to do certain things and that keeps you going...I know what your husband is talking about is not a nursing home but it is fairley close and it takes away your responsibility and you find yourself twittling your thumbs looking for something to do....Your hubby needs to take a look at his attitude towards old age and remain there in yours and his home....
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Apr 08
Where I live we have some really beautiful senior living communities. There are simple apartments and assisted living apartments where you can get help for yourself or your husband if you are unable to care for each other. I know when I feel I cannot take proper care of myself that is where I want to live. However if you don't feel that you are at that point in your life then all you have to do is say NO. BTW getting old is something we all have to do unless you choose to die young you might as well get used to it.
3 people like this
• United States
9 Apr 08
Most younnger people are working and taking care of their family during the week and visiting is done at the weekends whether you are in your own home or a retirement community. If you cannot afford transportation I'm sure all your friends would make some attempt to solve than problem.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
10 Apr 08
I still do not like senior citizen homes. I get along with all ages, not just those my age or older. I mean they may all be beautiful but can you imagine getting up in the morning, going downstairs and the first ones you see are some gray and white haired old men and ladies? I mean I live in a residential area and I can look out my window and there are the preschool kids playing in the yard, the young lady going to University, the middle-aged couple taking a walk, the next door neighor's little girl, the Filipino family, etc. I would not get near that in an Old Age's home.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
8 Apr 08
Hi suspenseful, I agree with you on this, you are much too young for such a place. I am 68 and my wife is 65, and we fully intend to stay in our own home as long as possible. As you say, sitting in those place with people much older than yourself would be depressing. My wife and I do not consider ourselves old, so you are little more than middle age. Take care and Blessings.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I have a relative who is over one hundred, so I am not exactly old yet. I am more comfortable with people with children, not someone who stares blankly and stands in front of the grocery aisle deciding what to do. And we have some very depressing old people in this city. Now I have to persuade my husband that we do not need to move. Now all we need to do is to get that d*mn billiard table out of the basement, fix the basement up, and do a bunch of stuff.
@bagumbayan (2705)
• Philippines
8 Apr 08
Then talk to your husband. Be honest to him. Do you have your children with you, I mean the older children. Maybe you can join them where they live. If you can stay with the place you are now living then stay there. When I grow old and when I retired from my work I want to live in my own house with my family. The reason maybe your husband would like to stay there is because of his health, and he is thinking that there there will be someone to look after you. Growing old is quite something most of us dont want to go to. Give him the reasons why, he will hear you. God Bless.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
10 May 08
I want to stay where I am or move to another house or at least travel in the winter. If my husband passed, I would rather move to the States, but I have my granddaughter here and want to stay close to her. It is just that I do not want to see seniors around all the time and just seeing families on Sundays and weekends is not enough. My health is quite good. In fact, it is my husband's health that is bad. and I do not want to leave my friends.
• United States
8 Apr 08
I really admire you for two things. First, I see in you a courage that shall, I hope, prove resilient and enduring in the years ahead. Okay, fine, you're getting a little older. That's a given fact for all of us, not only for you or me. Time spares no one. But the fact that you are unwilling to be eaten up by the toll that Father Time has to subject us all, I believe you shall weather the burden of having to see yourselves in some difficulties of all sorts, by your decision to stay in your home where it feels like, well, "home." I have never seen an amount of courage before. Usually, when I see people get old, they kind of are quite anxious about how are they gonna fair in the future. It's happening to you now. But I guess, what cuts you above all is that you're trying to choose a path harder to travel. And for that I really admire you. Second, I admire moreso the fact that your kind of one among the strong undercurrents in this issue. The trend right now is for old people to be placed in care houses and there be left to be taken care of other people. I see nothing wrong with that, especially when younger people - professional I suppose- are finding it hard to cope with having to take care of old people who really need more attention than normal. But having said that, I think the trend of care houses is a little to impersonal and anti-familial. You get to be taken care of other people, but as I look at it, it is the primary responsibility of the family to take care of their own, as a way to return the favor of being taken good care before in our lives. It stregthens bond even more, notwithstanding conflicts and other burdens, because we tend to nurture our own through ups and downs, through thick and thin, through hell or high waters. I just love the concept. And I am not sure I know exactly why. Thanks for posting.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I don't like to stuck with a bunch of old people. My husband thinks it is all right to live in a senior's home and he thinks that I am being selfish, but I would go crazy in an old people's home even if I did not have to care for myself. I do not like apartment living anyway. I would rather live in my house, or live in it part of the year and travel when it is cold. I really do not care for the climate in winter where I live and if possible would like to move south, but it seems that it is harder for people in Canada to move to the States than the Mexicans to move up. I have seen many of those senior homes and they are not that close to the Malls. And you cannot see your families unless it is the weekends. I want to interact with people of all ages, not just with people around my age and I want to get out doors, not open an apartment door, lock it, walk down to the elevator, go in it, open the front door and go outside. Just give me a back door and a front door and outside.
• United States
8 Apr 08
In my opinion, I think you should continue to look around. Not all senior complexes are the same. There are some really great ones out there. I know people who have moved into some complexes that have a lot of fun things to do as well as people that can help you out if you should need it. Some places have free transportation and maid services, too. And, many are close to urban areas with lots of shopping, or they will have transportation to those areas. You don't have to give up your independence at all. Just keep looking and don't move into a place unless you really like it.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I do not want to live in a senior's home. I do not care if it close to the shopping center, there are activities, etc. I do not want to get up in the morning, go down to breakfast, or even eat breakfast in the flat, and open the door and all I see are old people. I do not care if they are doing jumping jacks or somersaults down the hall, whether they are happy or content. I want to see people of all ages. I look out my window and I can see the neighborhood kids playing, some who are preschools. The other day I went for a walk and there was this little toddler toddling across the street with his mother fast behind. I saw my granddaughter learning to walk yesterday. If I were to go to a senior's home, unless my husband decided to drive me somewhere, the only time I could see children is on the weekends. Five days are way too long to wait.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
8 Apr 08
I wouldn't mind, here where I live the places are nice, cheaper than I have to pay now, and I can get out and do everything I did before, people 55 years old are not old, so that would not bother me, I am 53 now and can't wait until I can get one. But for you and your husband, you are going to have to talk this through, there is a whole lot at stake, your home, etc, so I do understand where you are coming from.
2 people like this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
27 May 08
the senior residences here in montreal are in the heart of the city and the minute you walk outside the residence there are parks, and malls, and schools etc with children all around. I have friends in seniors residences that have their children for overnight stays, they just get be their for extended periods of time
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
5 Jul 08
Not in Manitoba. In Winnipeg, they are scattered among the office buildings, and not near any Malls or shopping centers. They seem to think that once you are in an apartment residence for seniors, you do not need to go window shopping. I have a friend who is a widow and she is in her late seventies and her apartment is near a park, and a shopping center, but it is not a senior's apartment. It is a regular one. In Saskatoon, it is worse. They go where they have room so you might have relatives in Saskatoon, but wind up in Prince Albert or maybe Precville. So if someone is elderly and has to go into a residence there, she might not see her loved ones that easily.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I would not want to be with the same people of my age or older, or even just with those fifty five or so. You are missing the point. It is that I like to be with various ages, not just one and I happen to love children. I was persuaded to give up my only birth child and work on my own, get a job, and when I finally got married and adopted, it was one time only, although it was two at that time. There are rules in those places for overnight guests, and the only time anyone there sees children is on the weekends unless some of the people go out to the Mall or to the stores. I want to be able to see kids around and to go out of the door and see the grass on either side. People should not just live categorized as to station or age in life.
1 person likes this
@mipen2006 (5528)
• Australia
8 Apr 08
I'll be sixty-eight in a few months, but don't consider myself old. There's still plenty of life to go, and I don't intend to retire until the end of next year. I agree with you, I don't think I'd enjoy that environment, it would just enhance the aging process I think.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
11 Apr 08
To me it is scary. I mean some people age gracefully, but there are those who like decrepid and to see those every day, and the defeated faces is too much. I would rather be with those who enjoy life.
1 person likes this
@mipen2006 (5528)
• Australia
12 Apr 08
I guess I'm one of the lucky ones. There's plenty of things to look forward to.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
13 Apr 08
I look about twenty years younger, but I went gray prematurely so it sort of balances itself off, but then I say that I am blond. I am one of those people who turned platinum blond.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Apr 08
if i could afford it i would jump at the chance to move into oneI am old and fell like im in solitary confinement these days i could go for days without seeing a soul however i dont make enough to pay for one and crazy as it sounds i make too much to get assistance!those places at least have other folks arround if it wernt for my computer id go plum crazy !My daughter tells me well i bring you your supper every day !You know whar even prisoners get fed!!Thank God for my Lot!!!
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
10 Apr 08
I could not stand seeing all old people all the time. I get along with all ages, and i do find that some elderly citizens, well they did things and now they just want to take it easy and remember the past. To me, there is still the future.
1 person likes this
@gandatwo (602)
• Australia
7 Apr 08
Hi suspenseful,I certainly can sympathize, change at times can be very hard to accept.I received a lovely power point presentation last week which I would like to share with you,I only wish I could send the music and pics with the words,I do hope you enjoy. Old age is winter,alas,for many people,but for those who are wise and optimistic,it is the happy and fruitful time of harvest. So long as one continues to be amazed,one can delay growing old. The entire life of a human being depends upon "yes" and "No" uttered two to three times between the ages of sixteen and twenty-five. Old age arrives suddenly,as does the snow.One morning,on awakeningone realizes that everything is white. It is by growing old that one learns to remain young. If someone declares that he is able to do everything at sixty that he was able to do at twenty,then he was not doing very much when he was twenty. Old age embellishes everything.It has the effect of the setting sun on the beautiful twilights of autum. As one grows old,one generally rids himself of his shortcomings because they no longer serve any useful purpose. There are four great periods in the life of a man; the one where he believes in Santa Claus,the one where he no longer believes in Santa Claus,and finally the one where he looks more like Santa Claus. The good side of this,as old as one might be,is that one is always younger than he will ever be. The person who considers himself too old to learn something has probably always been that way. Have a nice Day. Who knows what the future holds for any one of us?The most important thing of all is to remain young at heart,and allow that little child within time to play. I am sure the senior apartment if it comes to this,will have several folk who felt the same as you,there may be new friends to meet and enjoy,it also may be giving you the opportunity to bring some sunshine into others lives. Take care,and good luck for your future plans whatever they may be.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
9 Apr 08
I want to remain young as I can. If I were eighty, then I would not mind, but it was my husband who wanted to retire at sixty. He wanted to settle down and now all he does is watch Tv, go on the computer, the only good thing he does besides us going to the Mall, was the cruise, but I saw how his mother was in her Senior Citizen'S home. She was happy doing jigsaw puzzles and going on tours, but I am still living. Poems and saying do nothing for me, and I do not sit and muse. Why I am writing a novel and it is not a reprospective one, but one with action, adventure, living life to the fullest, murders, revenge, etc. I would rather us get a camper and become snow birds than move into a place and see those who are worse off and do not understand that I want to play the piano, sing, and dance and not play cards, shuffle board, or old age pursuits.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 Jul 08
Old is not a matter of age. It is a matter of attitude. And I do not want to move to a place where they feel old and where they think that they cannot live in their own homes anymore, that they will soon die. I can tell if someone who is white haired is old by the way they walk, if they have this dejected look and start gazing blankly or standing in the middle of an aisle, they are old. If they are alert, then they are just over a certain age.
@gandatwo (602)
• Australia
9 Apr 08
With all due respect, I feel those people you refer to as being old may not consider themselves as such? different' strokes for diffrent folks...however seems it is all about you..go for it...Hubby is happy so go pursue your dreams... he perhaps is giving his health issue the respect it very possibly deserves. I must say it has been my experience with some older 'minded' folk to quite often dig their heels in at the suggestion of change,set in there ways etc.Good luck with your book,hope your muse stay true to you.
1 person likes this
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
8 Apr 08
i like the complexes that you have your own apartment and you can look after yourself, the next step is you do meals with the centre and the third is when you move into the centre itself (with nurses and the like) that is the palce where i want to go... seriously, they have activities for almost every day of the week! they do fun stuff like crafts, shopping and have a in house library! what more could you ask for? lol
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
It is not the library, and the crafts. It is just that I do not want to be around with a lot of old people. I feel more comfortable with people of various ages, and not all of them over fifty. Just think of the only time you get to see your grandchildren or any children for that matter is when they come on the weekends or for Sunday. Just think if you are like me and there was just you and your brother growing up, no younger siblings, and all these aunts and uncles, and you marry and have to adopt, and then no more babies even by adoption after that. So there are not that many babies or small children in your life and what there is is not that close. If you loved children and babies as much as I did and were denied them for much of your life, you would not want to live in a senior's home no matter if it were a palace.
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
8 Apr 08
I'm 74 and still working because I enjoy my work.My parents checked themselves in to a Nursing Home when they were 90 and loved it. Are you prepared to Care for your Husband, should he have another more debilitating stroke? If you were living in an assisted living facility there would be help with his care. I'd suggest you plan your future carefully, because you usually only get one chance. Think more of what you Love, rather than what you Hate.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I am 65, and my husband is younger than me. Should I shorten my life just so he can get the care? He is already getting physical therapy and he has to see the doctors to maybe get the blockage removed if there is any. I would rather die than move to one of those places, even if he were to get help and if we did, I would gradually go into a decline and die. We could get a Victorian Order of Nurses to come in and fix up the place with handles etc. and still live in our house. And then I will be able to intermingle with people of various ages from birth to whatever, and not only see babies and children on the weekends and be able to walk outside and see the grass instead of the hallway.
@Aingealicia (1905)
• United States
8 Apr 08
Ok question, when I lived in Maine, they had a place for older people and those who had disabilities, so some were younger. It was a nice community, the nicest thing about it. They all had their own apartment. Kitchen, bathroom, it was the size of a duplex with one floor is the only way that I can explain it. They had a nurse on duty in the central location that also had things like a community kitchen and things like that. They also had a pick up and delivery van for those who did not drive to go to town, on a bus route, and there were those that drove. It was 5 minutes from the nearest store but private so that you could enjoy that if you like. I am not sure what it was called but it was there. I am not sure if that would help you with what you are saying and allow your husband to think he won. Hehe. ok that was not meant to be mean, I am sarcastic and a New Yorker. I do understand what you are saying, I understand what your husband is saying as to what information I am reading. There is a balance. How is your husband doing with his recovery? Ainge
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
Ah no seeing babies or small children except on the weekend. No more walking down the street and saying "how cute" when the couple is taking their baby in the stroller. When it is senior's day, the bus comes and you all get in the bus and you go as a group and because some are in walkers, you get impatient because you are faster, and you all get back in the bus after buying stuff and go back to the same old people. Sounds depressing? Well for me it is. Is there a law that says old people should only be with old people? Why cannot there be apartment blocks or housing communities where there are not only old people, but younger people with families, etc.?
• United States
9 Apr 08
I think it's a two way street suspenseful. If my husband wanted to move into a place like that and I didn't, I would have to understand his reasons. There might be a few fears he's not telling you. He might be thinking it's the best thing (should something happen to him). I would sure want to look at every avenue I could think of before I did it. On the other hand, just because the other people act old, you don't have to. The first thing I think about is having financial security, no matter what the future brings.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I cannot see living in a place where the only time I see children, even the grandchildren of the other residents, is on the weekends or when we decide to go out shopping. Think of what it is to live in an apartment and across the hallway the only people you see are fifty-five or older and then think of living in a senior's housing complex, and everyone is fifty-five or older and since you cannot go shopping or out all of the time - you have to clean you place, that is all your see and if you want to go out, the place may not be close to a shopping center or a church. You either have to walk aways or get a taxi. It is the interaction with various ages that I would miss. And my husband has enough money, but once he goes into those places, he won't.
@mi2ok02 (406)
• United States
9 Apr 08
That is wonderful that you do not feel old! I think what your husband is thinking is about the security that someone is always around in case of health problems or if you need help with anything but there are other alternatives. Living in a Senior complex has a lot to offer for those who have time on their hands. Maybe there is something you and your husband can sign up for so that you can find others to socialize with if that is what he is needing? You could find it fun to take classes of all kinds through your local Senior Community Centers or even places like Salvation Army too.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I am too busy writing on my novel, I belong to a choir, I love to sing and have sung solo, and I love children too much to be in a place with everyone fifty-five or older. People seem to think that once you reach a certain age, you are happy to be with those of your own age, that you like the comradery of talking about what it was in the fifties, that everyone will understand you. But for all of you here, that is wrong. So please do not assume that we do not want to go into a senior's residence because we do not care about our loved one's health, or that we are selfish. We do not want to go there, because then we will miss the interaction with those fifty-four down to zero years of age.
• Australia
23 Apr 08
In Australia, we have Retirement Communities where you can have your own piece of paradise, including gardens. The good thing is, medical help is never far away and you can treat it as you would your own home (like you have now)oh, and some are even accepting pets these days too.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I would miss the interaction with people who have small children. Just because I happen to be 65 and my husband had a minor stroke, does not mean that I should not see people wit kids around all the time. Is there a law in Canada and I suppose in Australia, that once you reach a certain age, that children are now a bother and the less you see them the better?
1 person likes this
• Australia
5 Jul 08
I meant to add that you can have family stay too. That includes grandkids. Theres one not too far from us that supports the family unit, and some of the residents have their grandkids living with them fulltime.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
9 Apr 08
I also do not feel old but I am eighty and I am chuckling at your not wanting to live around old people as though they were some kind of disease. for one thing at fifty five one is certainly not old just mature. here in Ca we have Lesure world and it is super deluxe notthat I would want to live there really l I live in a large apt complex with my adult son so feel for you in a smaller place. small apts are no fun. Why cannot you just stay where you are or is your husband concerned about his health and wants to go to a place where they have health staff. i also like being around younger people but still old age is not contagious and some of us are rather nice to be around. Senior citizen is much nicer than old people said with a sound of digust. YOu will reach old age too you know.When you get to be my age and still have full mental capacity you will also dislike being called "Old people" with a sneer.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
You have not lived in Winnipeg. Here the old people act real old. Once they reach retirement, they go downhill. Why my husband has already been retired a year, he is 63 and he had a stroke, a small one, but a stroke non the less. If we were to go to an old age home or even a senior's home or an apartment complex for 55 and older, the only time we would see babies or small children is when they come over at the weekends, or if we go out to a Mall or to visit family. It is just that here they catagorize you. I think 90 and 100 is when you are considered old. I want to live among people of various ages, is that so wrong? Why do we have to be separate? But here in Canada, once you reach a certain age, they talk about going to the apartment complexes for those over 50, and when you reach 70 0r 80 the next step, until there is the assisted living facility. If there were communities where people of ages from 0 to 100 plus live, like if an old couple live in this house and the next door there is a young family, and across the street a middle age couple with teenagers, then I would not mind old people. But there is no place like that.
@naseefu (1607)
• India
12 Apr 08
It is good that you donot feel old.Keep it up suspenseful.But As you said I cannot hate old age people even if I am old.(Now I am only just 24).I also dont like old age homes.I think the life with the family and grand chlidren will be most good one.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
26 May 08
I like to be around people of various ages. I mean many of the seniors here look as if they lost hope. There is one old lady I know and she gets about, driving her car, and is really friendly and energetic, but she is the exception. Nost seniors I saw are not like her and even if they are, they talk about the old times, and I am looking to the future. I do not want to be with them all the time. I want to be with children, young people, able to see people of different ages and not on the weekends.