the same mistakes all over again

Well he can not control it. It is been a part of his personality for a long time. well, our next door neighbor has a kid that he got the same problem. to solve the problem they bought him cheap glass vases and told him to break one once he is angry instead punching someone. after a while. the boy became far better. his parents know how to pull the anger out of hem. I think your friend must find a way to knows how to control himself. he should consult professional people. passing through the situations many times does not mean you acquired the experience how to deal with it. It is my opinion.

hello, i have known a lot of people who have the same issues, strange but most of them are aware of what they are doing and even regret it but still do the same mistake over and over again. i have asked someone about this and i was amazed that it is rooted from the past (childhood) and or psychological disorder on their part. if i will base my judgement from those people i have known who have the same personality as your friend, i feel that they are feeling inferior inside out and the only way they can prove that they are the one on top is by hurting and or using their fist. it is not fair and i feel those who have problems like this should be place in a rehab because they are not only endangering their wives or partners life but as well as the kids and even those who happen to be on that scene. i know someone who beat a wife while she is pregnant and i just cant bear such scene. i honestly want to kill that person just to stop him hurting his wife coz i see how she suffers as well as the future kid. i do warned those girls who is having a relationship with that person and informed them that the guy is capable of hurting and even killing and she should be aware and warned herself if she is ready for that. anyway, i hope your friend find a way to fix himself and not let his fist do the talking and be aware that other's life is important too. takecare!

I didn't have the same experience like your friend but I have made mistakes over and over again due to my anger and impulsive behavior. If you don't learn to control any of that you will make the same mistakes over and over again. I am trying to control all of that now but I am sure there will be a time down the road that I may "forget". I just know what a fool I feel like after making those same mistakes. The last one was about 6 weeks ago and I asked a friend of mine if I am truly stupid. She said "no, just consider it as another fkn growth experience". True, that is true if you really look at why it happened and figure out why it happened again. However he will have to wake up and see this for himself. I have been told by others to control my anger and I never listened until one day I was FORCED to see it.

There are really people who don't have self-control, maybe the way they were brought up when they were growing up!and it is something that they can't just change within them no matter how they tried!

it seems untill he wakes up and realizes what he keeps loseing due to his mistakes hes gonna end up alone or hurting somone really badly sadly to say

Some people are not well educated and they don´t learn to treat well or properly other people, that is an awful mistake. It depends on the education that you received. best wishes ! Martín !

It probably won't be that easy for him. Something like that you can just say "ok i'm not going to hit anymore" He is going to have to go see some sort of specialist that can help him get past his anger. he has to learn with other ways to deal with his anger instead of hitting.

He needs help unlearning his behaviour. I am doubtful that he can do it on his own. My own husband is doing this right now. He does not hit but he has other patterns and behaviours that he turns to. He is getting help after finally realizing he can't do it on his own. It is a good thing too because I thought the same way you do. "Why don't you just stop?" and "Haven't you learned your lesson yet?" He realized what he was doing was wrong but couldn't control it. He learned this way of life since he was a boy. I hope your friend gets the help he needs.

The reason why he keeps making the same mistakes is because he needs therapy. Change brings change and he needs to talk to someone about the fact that he is an abuser. He may have deep issues from his childhood that you know nothing of. He will continue hitting women until he realizes he needs help. Try suggesting it to him.

Yes you are right se7enthbird, life indeed is a learning process. I am also sure that your friend knows the part where he went wrong, unfortunately he keeps on repeating the same part, it's just that he can't control it. We must understand that every people has their own way of handling or managing anger. If your male friend keeps on doing it, he has a this poor way of controlling what he feels inside. Releasing anger should not in any way inflict pain to one's self or to others. He can seek psychological help for this I think. Ask your friend if he is willing to make some changes to himself or some help. He must hear some counsellings from specialist and some professionals about this matter- about his mental and emotional condition. And of course about his anger.