Does anyone have the same problem as I, I post about a controversl

@suspenseful (40316)
Canada
April 23, 2008 11:21am CST
subject regarding gender, or religion, and you get so much flack and flames from those who do not agree with you, or those who have a "talk about 'the poster(either me or the one who posts) between themselves, saying me or that poster is horrible, racist, nasty, mean, stupid, bigot, or any other terms of derision they can say without getting the myLot censors after them? Does that make you want to not write about religion or sensitive issues, and just go to write about the safe interests?
13 people like this
35 responses
• United States
23 Apr 08
Not me!!! As long as MyLot allows it, I will post about it. I don't do much discussion posting, but if its something that is bugging me, I'm going to post it. If a discussion creates a reaction within me, I will respond. The only way to solve controversial issues is to talk about them, its the only way we can come to an understanding. I won't bite my tongue for anyone, in real life or on this site. Its like a friend of mines signature line in her e-mail. "I don't care what you think about me, you have yet to find out what I think about you!!!"
5 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
23 Apr 08
Does that make you want to not write about religion or sensitive issues, and just go to write about the safe interests? NOpe not at all...If ppl dont like my opinion or views they dont need to read it..just skip past my post...What find annoying is when I've posted a heartfelt comment on a controversial topic that i'm passionate about and having someone come in and tell me I'm horrid, have no conscious, evil, need god, am lost and so on and so forth..More than annoying though I find it pathetic and pitiful really I mean how sad must ones life be in order for them to constantly try to belittle others for feeling,living, believing differently ya know...Its that whole "bully syndrome"...put the attention on someone else (usually someone they are jealous of) in order to not have to concentrate on the issues in their own lives so they can keep living in denial..Sad really
4 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
9 Jun 08
I like writing about religious subjects, after all I am a Christian, but it seems when I do not agree with someone, it seems that they figure that I am a bad person and that it is the law that I should agree with them. Now with most people, I can say I am pro life, homosexuals are not born that way but someone may have abused them, etc, and other things and they will let it go at that, but there are those who try to convince me to change and agree with them and will keep writing in the hopes that I will. I mean if I cannot convince my husband to become a Christian how can I convince someone here? And it works in reverse, my husband cannot convince me that abortion is right, then neither can anyone else unless that person actually did see an unborn baby who was aborted.
3 people like this
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
23 Apr 08
Hi suspenseful, I think I know the article you are referring to here. I commented on it. I happened to disagree with you entirely on that issue. You thought I thought you were a bad person. I didn't. I was just explaining that I didn't agree and why. I didn't see any name calling but a lot that did not agree with you. Maybe I missed something. If you enter into a sensitive topic that is apt to touch some emotionally, you are apt to recieve emotionally charged responses. You can't take them to heart.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
23 Apr 08
I did have a 'funny uncle' so I know what it is like to have someone try something. I also know that people who have relatives who are different, they sometimes think that everyone with that same condition is good. I also know that there are news reports that are kept out of the news because you cannot say anything negative about certain people and that is wrong. That is a different story however.
3 people like this
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
24 Apr 08
I'm so confused. I must have been thinking of a different discussion. I'm sorry.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
25 Apr 08
It must have been one of my other discussions. I do go back to some because I wanted to plus the responders. Unfortunately I read the nasty posts of those who i should have not given posts to and there were a couple who were talking among themselves like two teenage girls.
2 people like this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
9 Jun 08
Yes i tend to avoid those discussions too. What is odd to me those are the people who are the rudest are also the most sensitive when someone disagrees with them.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
I find that when I disagree with someone, they seem to think I am a bigot, racist, etc. and it seems that they only want those who agree with them. I do not like just answering responses on "what good deed did you do today?" or "did you eat breakfast, today," but in order for me to get my star up, that is what I have to do. I live in Canada and there is enough censoring going on of the Christians, that I do not want myLot to be also a place of fear.
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16236)
• United States
6 May 08
All the more reason to stay away from topics like that. Well that's the reason why I do because some people can be really nasty and I would rather answer non controversial ones and not get the flack that comes with it.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
8 May 08
I like talking about controversial subjects because they affect me. Abortion affects me in that we only could get two babies instead of three or four because there was no babies available and they are three months at the time. Being against Christianity affects me as a Christian because there are countries where being against Christianity means increased persecution and that means the missions over in China and these other countries are in danger. Being against illegal immigration affects me in that if my husband passed, and I wanted to move to the state legally, I could not do so because all these illegals are encouraging the US government to make it tougher for people to come in. The flak on global warming affects me because of Al Gore and the farmers changing from growing food to growing ethanol increases the price of gas, making us having a choice of working out of the house rather than working at a job, of visiting relatives out of the province, or heating the house, eating healthy rather than eating cheap stuff that is not good for you. So we can go on these without being angry at each other.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
23 Apr 08
I know exactly what you mean, but I do not allow anyone to stop me from saying what I want to say. Everyone else on here gets the opportunity to speak what is on their mind and I insist on doing the same thing. Trust me, they only attack the truth.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
23 Apr 08
I think that too, and I do try to explain and give links, but then there is this one person who just wants a fight. I sometimes stop going there and get back to the safe stuff and then I read something in the paper or on the net, like that last one, and it goes against my grain.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
24 Apr 08
The Bible promises that we will be persecuted for our beliefs. But greater is he that is in use than he that is in the world. You keep on speaking truth, no matter what the cost.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
I will. The trouble is will my word get through. I live in Canada and the human rights commission here is talking about a rule that they can censor the internet so that if anyone in Canada says something they consider a hate crime (like quoting Romans I and saying homosexuality is a sin) they can delete it. Now you know why I am desperate to go to see Florida and why I was disappointed with my husband saying we cannot go to the States because of his stroke. The time will come that we might have to flee there.
2 people like this
@nova1945 (1614)
• United States
23 Apr 08
Yes, and sometimes they get nutso with the Minus button to get their point across. There are times when my star/ratings go down after one of those that I start only looking at things like "what shade of lipstick do you wear" because it is safe. But I always come back after sulking for a couple days. You just can't shut me up...haha
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
9 Jun 08
It is the star going down that bothers me the most. I started one of these controversial subjects and that person got her minions to give me a minus. Yet if I had gone through all of her discussions and given her minus - just to be mean and for revenge, it would have hardly made a dent and then all her friends would have gone through her posts and given pluses even though they had no time to reply. It seems you just cannot win.
2 people like this
@nova1945 (1614)
• United States
10 Jun 08
It can be discouraging for sure. I don't know how much good it will do, but I just gave you pluses all the way through. Hope it helps some.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
Thank you. It did help. All I need is some more, and I will be back to a nine. I doubt that I am good enough for a ten.
2 people like this
@carmelanirel (20979)
• United States
23 Apr 08
It depends on my mood, sometimes I do and sometimes I don't..And I stick with both Biblical and/or experience when I reply..
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
9 Jun 08
I find that sometimes I will, but I do not like it when the person flames me and gets her friends to flame me and say that I am a horrible person, I feel like I have been attacked. I do not want to stick to safe subjects, but I do not have a university education and have to look up the references to back my stand that is a Christian stand and if someone claims to be a Christian and yet goes against the biblical view of things, and is a much better writer and more charismatic than me, than she can persuade others to her side and I cannot stand that. I do know a lot of Biblical instances, but as for experiences, well that is another story.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
15 Jul 08
I stick with Biblical, but I am not that good at remembering where that verse was. I can say that somewhere in Paul's epistles, there is something about having the whole armor of God, but then I have to look it up in a concordance, and then I get a whole lot of verses, and sometimes they are not the ones I am looking for.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Sep 08
ahh, the armor of G-d..I am getting ready to do a study on that with my son, it is in Ephesians 6 starting in verse 10..But like you, I do have to go to my concordance more often than not, but that is ok, as long we are teachable, right?? Blessings...
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
23 Apr 08
naw noy you , ya just keep on keeping on good luck there will always be someone who dont like what is said but they realy need to move on to something else . I might not agree with all any one says about religion but thats me and I will put some answer in. MIght not be what any one likes but then thats me!
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
If someone is nice about it, then I do not mind, but it is the kind that makes one think that they are going to report you unless you agree with them. We have too much of this up in Canada. It really hurts and you do not know whether these kind will also find out your ip address and report you to the human rights commission here in Canada. I will not stop from writing or go to fluff because of them though.
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
5 Jul 08
me either
2 people like this
@anniepa (27236)
• United States
5 Jul 08
I think that in a forum such as myLot we should be able to post about the topics that interest us most and we should be able to do so without getting flamed as long as we don't do any of our own flaming. "Safe" interests are fine but they can get boring after awhile. I just think they key is to respect one another and to get rid of the assumption that some people may have that anyone with a different opinion on any of these sensitive issues must be a terrible person. There are "good" people from all walks of life and from both sides of every issue and everyone has their own unique reason for feeling as they do. For me it's not about trying to change anyone's mind, all I want from here is to interact with my friends, whether they agree with me on everything or not, and to be treated with respect. I've also learned we should be willing to "give" a little and to not jump to conclusions and be too easily offended. I have a friend here with whom I had a bit of a misunderstanding when we first "met" here and she made me realize that when we're communicating through writing rather than verbally sometimes something that may be meant to be humorous or witty may instead come across as mean and sarcastic since we don't hear the tones or inflections in the voices of the poster. Also, as we get to know people better we get to know their personal style and personality better. I've seen what you mentioned about "talking about the poster" and that's just not right at all. It's not right in life outside of myLot and it's not right here either. Annie
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
6 Jul 08
I do not like gossiping about the poster. I will defend her, even though in some cases my defense may be wrong (she is having a bad day, maybe she was treated badly by someone, etc.) but to me, that is much better than saying that she is a stupid, ignoranmus or whatever insult is insulting enough. I also think that what I believe as far as religion is right,and just as someone who happens to be Muslim, does not want me to convert them, they should not convert me. If they are interested, they can just as easily look for a Christian church, and ask about Christianity and if I am interested, I will look for a Muslim mosque and ask about Islam, giving the example. I know about sarcasm, but I also know about the inability to say what you really mean. I have found that I have written something that was misinterpreted because I was so upset when I wrote it that it turned out wrong.
@chrislotz (8203)
• Canada
2 Jul 08
I am finding more and more, that some people here in mylot are not very nice and they attack you if you say something they don't agree with. So I am trying to stay away from any discussions that are important or too deep. I just responded to a discussion about coffee and I put into my response that I think coffee is not good for a person and that it helps to retain your water. I didn't put in a link to show where I read that, and I got pounced on. So I have posted a link to show where I read that, and I got an apology of sorts, not a I'm sorry for pouncing on you, but a, I will read your information and see for myself. I thought I was posting a response to something that was an everyday thing and not something that was a serious discussion and so I hav now learned to stay away from anything that is for informational stuff. It is sad that mylot is changing and that some of the members are taking this site so serious. I thought we were supposed to enjoy being a member here, and not worry about offending anyone in just giving our own opinions. I try to always now say, this is just my opinion, but sometimes I forget to and it gets me into trouble. So I will just stay away from anything contriversal from now on, and if that doesn't work, I might just quit mylot altogether because it isn't fun anymore when people get so insulting. This is just my opinion.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
Well being a coffee and a tea lover I will not pounce on you. But I guess it depends on how much you drink. I have just finished drinking three cups of green tea because I heard it is good for you and I had one cup of coffee. So that is for the day, and now I will drink herb tea the rest of the day. I like being a member, but one reason I joined is that it does not have the silly rules as "no talking about politics, agree with those even when they are wrong, etc."
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Apr 08
I really don't care what other think or say about my postings. This is an open forum so I just ignore anyone who seems to try and inflame because that completely deflates their intentions.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
I would not have minded, but that these people also ganged up and gave negative marks and since they were in the majority, I did not stand a chance and no matter how many safe subjects I answer I cannot stand a chance. The only thing is that when I write more to explain myself, I get paid more. So in reality their rantings did not work.
1 person likes this
@wasim989 (2303)
• India
24 Apr 08
Religion should be kept aside on mylot because when it comes to religion everyone thinks they are on the right path and hence they try to force others to adopt their views and this causes mix reaction.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
9 Jun 08
It is all right to talk about your beliefs. After all, when I leave my church or my house, I do not stop being a Christian. Like we have an edict against being covetous and taking advantage of others, and that also translates into no gambling. So I do not go to the lottery ticket because I am no longer in Church. One can talk about their beliefs, and myLot is one of the few sites where non Christians and Christians can talk about their faith and what it means to upholds the standards of their beliefs without being arrested or banned. Also being the most popular does not mean you are right. Thousands of people worshiped the image in Daniel, yet they were all wrong.
1 person likes this
@gloamglozer (1285)
• Australia
24 Apr 08
Well no. I dont usually get that problem at all to be honest. no1 has tried to put me down as far as i know and i do post kind of semi-controversial subjects
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
I think it is when you do not agree with what the majority or the most important poster who has a lot of friends that you get into trouble, especially if you go with the Christian view, and I do not mean the Christians who are not Bible believers, but the Christians who have let the world enter into their services.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164654)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Apr 08
oh yes suspenseful it got me so much strife that I was punished by being negatived from a ten down to a six in as many days just for stating my own opinion. I did not disrespect anyone nor did I flame or call anyone nasty names yet someone came out to get me and they did so now I keep my discussions on the safe side as there are some here who never seem to grow up.
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
That is what happened to me. In fact it has kept me from going to the discussions I responded to, to avoid a fight and kept me from putting notify on and just gong to the myLot web site and going through the friend's list and just doing the digest I just do not want to get lower stars than I do now and yet I do not just being safe. I really hate when someone asks how often I change the sheets on my bed (insinuating if I changed them less than once a week, I am a slob.)
1 person likes this
@p_vadla (1687)
• India
24 Apr 08
One can do whatever one wants to do but there is a price to pay for it. We have seen many who did what you intend to do and results are there for every one to see.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
But should all opinions that do not agree with the status quo - i.e. abortion is all right, anyone can marry anyone regardless of gender, we love each other who cares if he is already married, etc. all roads lead to heaven, everyone else can state their opinion except for Christians? And what if the status quo changes, suppose that it becomes that only people who were born in Ireland are allowed to state their opinions, or anyone who says that people born in India do cheat will be banned, etc. And what about those who are hurt because some cowards do not want them to state their opinions? Who makes up to them, years later when society realized that what they said was right and changes but that person is too old to reap the benefits? These keeping people from stating their opinions is wrong.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
24 Apr 08
Anybody who writes about controversial topics has to understand that this is what happens, when you write about controversial topics, you will get that. If you say something racist it is racist, no sugar coating it, etc. Safe topics will be better if you can't handle the flak that comes back from controversial subjects.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
I have my ideas of racism, and they are, "if you cater to a particular ethnic group, say that they are wonderful, give them the best positions in Tv shows, make them the moral judge of everyone else, you are just as racist as if you wear a hood, burn a cross, or call all people of color vicious names." I also believe a person can turn racist is those of the other ethnic group can insult them and they cannot insult them back. If I cannot insult them and call the n word, they cannot insult me and call me the w word. So there should be no racial derogatives said in response to color, religion, or origin. And I will not sugarcoat and make the homosexuals feel good about themselves by calling them gay. As a writer, I find that offensive that they would steal a word that means happy go lucky, etc. for themselves.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Apr 08
I don't avoid controversy at all. I love it. If someone posts a controversial subject, I'm glad to answer. I just give my honest opinion and if it bothers someone, then they just shouldn't post the question. Some people see controversy as a bad thing, but I don't. It's just another way to learn about how your fellow human beings feel about important subjects. Sometimes you can learn from it, but when people just get all bent out of shape and call you names, you just learn that some people are just a holes!
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
I love talking about Christianity and politics. But it seems that on the net they only want just one view and no one else's. So what they do is to flame everyone views except theirs, write articles on how terrible the people who against them are, etc. But it will not stop me. I am going to keep posting even though I have to catch up on my commenting and plusing. Still got a ways to go.
1 person likes this
@mipen2006 (5528)
• Australia
24 Apr 08
To be honest suspensful I leave sensitative issues alone exactly for that reason. To me everyone can have their own views on those issues and some are very strong and get offended if your ideas or beliefs differ from theirs.
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
Sometimes a sensitive issue bothers me so much, that I have to speak up. I think these trolls or anti-anyone's view except theirs, do not want us to express our views. I also find that some of the ordinary discussions are just as dangerous if you do not express yourself right. I do feel it is a matter of not reading the discussion, not reading between the lines, etc. I have had that happen to me, and boy do I hate having to explain it more thoroughly later on.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Apr 08
No, I get board if I can't talk about politics and/or religion. I feel as if I'm right when people resort to calling me names. That's what people do when they feel as if they have no valid points in a discussion.
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
4 Jul 08
I do not like name calling or flaming. I like talking religion and about politics, but I do not have the great education of those University or College graduates. I mean what chance has a high school got grade twelve on the business program have against those people. It gets depressing and I hate reading just fluff discussions.
1 person likes this