what made you distrust the person you trust?

@mkchaves (533)
Canada
April 29, 2008 6:21am CST
someone lied to me a couple of times... im trusting back again, i want to trust again. i keep looking for the first directions for that first step. But, everday seems like the day before. i make plans to trust again only to find myself freezing up or having flashbacks. i need to know what the first step to trust are and no matter what kind of advice, no matter how much one says "you can trust me", something keeps holding me back. everyone says it takes time to rebuild the trust, but thats what we dont have - time -. Trust is the quickest thing to lose but the longest thing to gain... :(
17 responses
• Philippines
29 Apr 08
My roommate of 3 years whom I've treated like a sister used to upgrade her phone almost every month that her supplier was already giving her a generous discount. When I wanted to buy a Nokia N70 I asked her if she can get the phone for me from her supplier to get the discount. She gladly said yes, so when my bestfriend from the office also wanted one I bought two. My roommate took my money, took off and never gave the phone I ordered.
@mkchaves (533)
• Canada
30 Apr 08
thats so sad..
• Philippines
1 May 08
Yeah, it was.. It almost felt like a boyfriend cheated on me.
@4xmyworld (183)
• Malaysia
29 Apr 08
My honest opinion is to give your trust only for the second time around. But make sure to give that require a lot of pleading and begging from hat someone. If you are betrayed (this is the right word) for the third time then just forget to give a third chance. If you do then you will be viewed as "cheap".
@mkchaves (533)
• Canada
29 Apr 08
hehehe.. thanks for the response! :) i'll keep that advice inside my head! :) Thanks
• United States
4 May 08
my husband had an interview for a job. When he got home I asked him what happened to our last five dollars we had (had to last us three days) he said that he didn't know that he remember me having it last. Well I called my mom and she offered us money, so we went out got into his pick up to go. I smelled fries and asked him if had bought food on his way home and he said no. But I knew I smelt food and went looking i found a wrapper under my seat from McDonalds. He claimed it was an old wrapper, but he left a fry piece in it and it was still warm. After that he came clean, But I couldn't believe he lied about that. Even worse claim I lost the money.
@praveenjena (1305)
• India
4 May 08
trust is a very important thing in any relationship.... there is no value to a relationship if there is no trust in it. i value trust to anything in a relationship. but distrust comes to the relationship if the person whom i trust does say some grave lies to me. i do not like to be lied by someone whom i trust...
@jesbellaine (4157)
• Philippines
1 May 08
Same like you. If a trusted person lied repeatedly to me then I would lose my confidence in trusting him/her. It is not easy to gain trust and yes, you are right, it is easy to lose it. Fortunately, I still trust other people eventhough someone dear to me had broken my trust. I still believe in other people. :) Cheers!
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
1 May 08
I can trust ple easily.. even though after they had lied to me again and again.. I will still trust them, but never completely again.. I will hold back on wat i can tell them and what i feel i cant tell them.. In other words, we will just be frenz on the superficial side but without and real friendship involved..
@SHAMRACK (8384)
• India
30 Apr 08
Dear friend, I do remind the wording of William Shakespeare as "No legacy is so rich as honesty". As if some one we trust from our heart betray or cheats it might be the most bitter part of our life. The reaction would be much worse as one never predicted that distrust. Hence I feel trust none until we get ourselves prepared to feel the taste of distrust. May in practical life this might be difficult for me. Still another aspect is that we cannot live here without trust.
@crackhead (1826)
• India
30 Apr 08
Loosing trust is something which is quick hard to gain back as you said. You can give a couple of chances but again and again. I had one girl in my life whom i trusted to such an extent that i cared nothing in this world. Finally when i realised that she was cheating me, i had no other choice but give her a chance. Still things din't change much and the cheating continue to such an extent that she betrayed me. One chance was some thing which i was able to wait and see and thats all i couldn't trust her any more, now she is out of my life and am living peacefully. Thats how it is , dont take chances when it comes to trust loosing trust is loosing yourself in the process. Wish you good luck Happy mylotting.
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
30 Apr 08
it is really hard to give trusts to people. when you have gained someone's trust, never lose it and never ever think that trust will be forever. when one is too secured and not careful we can do something, even little things that could lose us a person's confidence in what we do. it is true that trust is hard to gain and easy to lose... i have trusted people in my life. more than half of them has just left me in the sand to sink. i have learned my lessons in life. trusting too much can be bad too.
@lingli_78 (12846)
• Australia
30 Apr 08
of course if somebody lies to me again and again, i will not be able to trust the person again... it takes me a long time to trust a person and it will only take me second to crush the trust if the person just make simple lie to me... i hate liars and it is hard for me to forget the incident if i am being lied...
30 Apr 08
We are all humans and we all can make mistakes. But when the mistake is repeated then it is no longer a mistake. Betraying someones trust the first time and then appologizing can be considered a mistake. But there is no forgiveness the second time.
@Cocoa33 (921)
• United States
30 Apr 08
it was the dishonesty, that caused me to distrust them. i feel that if a person can't be truthful in what he or she say in what they do. that is proof that they will be doing that down the line.
@rmuxagirl (7568)
• United States
29 Apr 08
There are different things that makes me distrust someone, the main thing would be if they lied to me, cheated on me, didnt treat me right and so much more. It's hard to regain my trust as well.
• Philippines
29 Apr 08
if the person cheat and lie to me, that..I will distrust him.
• India
29 Apr 08
If some one has lost his/her trust once , then its very defficult to bring it back ...though we try to do it so .... thanks !!!
@subha12 (18453)
• India
29 Apr 08
there were so many things. may be those were very practical.he started o avoid me. it made me think there is something wrong. as i could not find out, i kept mum. then there were many indications when i realised there are many things taht he is chaeting. the bolt came when he behaved badly with me.
@ahna09 (106)
• Philippines
29 Apr 08
what made me distrust the person i trust? answer: it is wheh he/she lie to me... do i give another chance? yes..i do...he/she may have a second chance but that's the last chance i could give.. if ever he/she lie to me again... i wont trust him/her anymore.. i may listen to him/her but not believe in him/her anymore...