Medical Writing

United States
May 2, 2008 7:13am CST
I'm not writing a whole medical story, but I have a little part in my story that has a doctor working on someone, and it's really messing me up. I'm not sure I wrote it right, and I can't go on without making sure it's right! I can't think of how to move forward. So if anything knows anything about the medical field, could you please read this small section of my story and help me fix it so it is correct. Thanks so much! *This story has not been reedited yet, so there might be a lot more things to fix. So if you need to you can ignore any other mistakes I make =P Really just worried about the medical stuff right now!* Thanks again! ...The doctor was tending to her forehead, taping a piece of gauze to a small gash at her hairline. Kindland stood over her, watching both men work. “Done,” the deputy said, and stood up holding the handcuffs. Melissa’s arms hung loosely at her side. “Good,” Kindland said. He knelt down beside Melissa and helped her raise her arms to the chairs arm rests. “Done up here,” the doctor said, disposing of the dirtied cloth. “I’m going to need to take care of her hands now Detective, if you could move aside.” Kindland stood up and moved behind Melissa. The doctor removed a bottle of _____________ from his medical bag, along with a small towel and some wrapping gauze. He placed the towel lightly across Melissa’s lap, and guided her hands on top of the it. “Now my dear, your hands are badly torn up. This will help keep them from getting infected, but it is going to sting a lot.” The doctor held Melissa’s left hand and poured the ___________ over it, Melissa winced at the stinging. Then the doctor wrapped it tightly in the gauze. “Good girl Melissa, you’re doing great,” the doctor said as he repeated the procedure on her right hand. Afterwards he started packing up his medical bag. “She really should come down to the hospital soon to get her hands redressed.”
2 people like this
3 responses
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
2 May 08
The only thing I could think of to fill those blanks was...bottle of peroxide...that is most commonly used for cuts, abrasions and wounds as it disinfects them and it does sting like a "b"...also Iodine does as well, but peroxide would be better
• United States
3 May 08
I'll check out peroxide too! lol. So you think a doctor is more likely to use that rather than iodine? thank you pye! :)
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
3 May 08
My great grandmother was a nurse...she used peroxide for all kinds of cuts, abrasions and wounds..everything
• United States
2 May 08
I would say iodine. I was going to tell you bactarin ointment, the brown stuff; but that doesn't sting, even in an open wound. From the descriptors you have here, I would say that the doctor is using iodine. I would make one small change though. Iodine is dabbed on, not poured. If you are going to use iodine for this, you will have to change it from poured to dabbed.
• United States
2 May 08
I will defeniatly change it to being dabbed on! It won't be hard at all! =) Thank you for both of your suggestions! I appreciate the help! :)
1 person likes this
• United States
31 May 08
Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you, again lol. Just wanted to say I am going to use iodine since a couple of you recommended it. And I wanted to thank you for telling me to dab it on instead of pouring! I appreciate the help! :)
1 person likes this
@DavidReedy (2411)
• United States
3 May 08
I would read up on basic field dressing, first aid, treating wounds, etc.