This makes me so MAD!

United States
May 7, 2008 7:49am CST
Do you ever start having a discussion with someone only to realize that they have already discounted anything you are going to say? I hate this. I hate when someone is too stubborn to acknowledge other viewpoints. I am not saying they have to agree with me, but when they are just sitting there (NOT listening to what I'm saying!) waiting for me to stop talking so they can insult me or say how wrong I am when they haven't even considered what I've said. Do you know what I'm talking about?
8 people like this
16 responses
• United States
7 May 08
oh yea.all you have to do is bring up smoking in any context on here,and you'll find examples of that. plus,minus,they don't read it.it's like they're attacking the word itself LOL.
• United States
7 May 08
If someone really doesn't care to discuss a subject, they should ignore it!
2 people like this
• United States
7 May 08
exactly.that's the best way to go about it. some people just want to argue it seems.
2 people like this
@bond0077 (375)
7 May 08
i would need to know who we r talkin about here and what topics because if its about banana republic's not having panties its not my discussion sorry but politics NOW WE R TALKIN!WWF get out of here!UFC now we r talking!
2 people like this
@teison2 (5924)
• Norway
7 May 08
I know what you are talking about. That sort of behaviour makes me so mad. it's like when you see politicians. they do not debate. They do not listen. they just consentrate on getting their view across. Well - write it down then. do not waste other peoples time and energy. It is totally respectless behaviour.
2 people like this
• United States
8 May 08
Politicians hire people to develop their positions in a statistical fashion for the demographic they're facing at the moment. So they express their stance according to the numbers. For example, if I know that, say, 85% of the people in my district support a new light rail initiative, it's a good election strategy for me to support it as well. It doesn't matter what one fellow in the audience has to say, because I know that most of the people will be behind me. That's one of the reason you get so many phone calls from political pollsters during election season.
2 people like this
@teison2 (5924)
• Norway
8 May 08
I ment debates between political parties - or elected representatives. Here political parties go to the elections based on their party program. It would still be interesting to have them actually listen when oponents speak. If they do not it will all just be a big game. no improvement comes without communication
1 person likes this
@ebsharer (5518)
• United States
7 May 08
Thats when I agree to disagree! I have a friend that does that some times. She feels one way I feel another I know there is NO changing this persons mind and thats okay with me. Its the fact that be respectful enough to hear what I have to say. I once said "the point of a discussion is to hear the other person!" That stopped the person for a moment and she heard what I had to say. (that time)
2 people like this
• United States
7 May 08
I just hate when I make a point about something and they try to deny that it is true when we both know it is and then they try to come up with some ridiculous reason why I'm wrong. Oh well. I have to "agree to disagree" a lot, it seems!
1 person likes this
@winterose (39922)
• Canada
7 May 08
yes I do know people like that, but sometimes, they are just saying they don't agree, and that is okay, nobody has to agree with everyone. But there are people who will just disagree with everyone. That can also be good because it helps you to see another point of view, maybe one you haven't considered before.
2 people like this
@bond0077 (375)
7 May 08
ok here is what i think you should always be with someone equal to yourself because if you are dating a university professor and you r a waitress who's knowledge will win? ok i was a hair stylist for ten yrs,would it be fair to have a debate with a hairstylist student?so as long as you know what you are talking about,i once had a problem with a mexican girl who when i try to tell her how warm to dress according to the temp outside she would wear the opposite so when she is freezing in a t shirt what can i say?
@jillmalitz (5132)
• United States
7 May 08
I think that is just rude. We all have our own opinions and frequently disagree with others. But isn't that part of the reasons to have discussions?
2 people like this
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
7 May 08
I think so but I have a girlfriend that wants to do all the talking with no stopping to see if I have something to say about it and then goes right on to another subject. I do think people need to learn to listen better and then say what they have to say.. If they stop listening then I stop talking.
2 people like this
@Hatley (164743)
• Garden Grove, California
7 May 08
I used to work in a hospital in Phoenix ariz and had this one coworker who was into being just a tad better than anyone else. she asked me why she had not been able to get a date and I spent awhile trying to help her by giving my view point andthen she told me very bluntly that I did not know what'I was talking about. so I said,okay do your thinking as you will anyway.but if you did not hold yourself to be so much better than the rest of us you would not have a bit of trouble getting a date. she had wanted me to be honest with her but she had not listenedto my ideas at all.She was a very house proud person who thought all men were scum yet she was really lonely and wanted a date. Whoever she had dated would have been hard put to please her as she watched everymove anyone made in her house and winced whenever anyone walked on her white carpeting pr sat down on her zillion dollar white sofa. She finally did geta date with a wealthy business man who dated her just once and told her to get a life.lol
• United States
7 May 08
I hate when people do that! Sometimes I think certain people just aren't prepared to hear the truth about themselves so they lash out at people who try to tell it.
• United States
8 May 08
It is really hard to try to listen when people talk. I have to practice listening to people, and letting them completely finish their thought. I try to have positive comments or if what they are saying is nuts, I try to smile and say something supportive and most importantly not mention my personal feelings, The longer i live the more I realize I know about .000001 percent of anything, I've been humbled quite a bit with some recent happenings. I try to think about what they are saying, before I say anything, because sometimes when you don't let people finish what they are saying before you respond, you can sound really dumb, lol. And I'd hate for a friend to be trying to help me, and I was too stupid to listen.
1 person likes this
@suhascg (227)
• Australia
8 May 08
ya i understand what u r trying to say.. it has happened to me quite a few times.. these are people who envy you a lot or are jealous of you, maybe because you are more successful in life than them, or maybe because you are in a better position than them, or maybe because you are given more importance than the other person, or various other reasons... these people are just jerks,dont take it too seriously..
@KrauseHome (34995)
• United States
8 May 08
Been there done that many times, and it is VERY annoying. There are people I work with who tend to be like this, and I just never understand how they can be like this, and not realize it, and then wonder anymore why most people tend to ignore them, and not want to have much to do with them. It has gotten so bad with a couple of them to where I even made a comment once... "What goes around comes around", and some things have happened recently in their life to maybe wake them up and think a little more next time before they start doing this to people. Actually I wonder what ever happened to Do Unto Others as You Would Have Them Do Unto You? Just some of my thoughts.
1 person likes this
@jawaharks (590)
• India
8 May 08
I can understand molly....But people who are not listening to other's speech may have some inconvenience. So that may stop them from listening to others speech and concentrate on their work. So we cant blame all others.
1 person likes this
@elmiko (6640)
• United States
8 May 08
This is what you call people with short attention spans or they may not even have the ability to take things in. They may not be able to tolerate any point that they might be incorrect or wrong about things. There is also a thing that almost everybody knows about called love. Love causes people to take somebodies side whether they maybe right or wrong. I've dealt with all these people in life. Yes I know it stinks. Some of these people are not even worth discussing things with. Don't look back and go the other way. Welcome to the real world.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
8 May 08
Yes. My husband does that. He is so stubborn sometimes...well most of the time. He can never admit that he might be wrong. The thing is though he is often forgetful too so a day or two later he may totally say something different.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12846)
• Australia
8 May 08
yes, i also dislike it when somebody doesn't what to listen to other people opinions... i think those kinds of people are just too proud of themselves besides being stubborn... i usually avoid having a conversation or discussion with those people as all they can do is only to ridicule or annoy me...
1 person likes this
• United States
8 May 08
Wow, it's hard to take that kind of response, I know, but honestly I've been on both sides of that fence. I'm a computer guy (a systems engineer) by trade, and sometimes when I get into discussions with people about technology, they can say things that clearly point out to me that they don't understand the very basics of the topic; That can cause me to shut them out immediately. It has nothing to do with being stubborn or not wanting to see other viewpoints in these instances, it's just that what they are saying is absolutely incorrect in a factual sense. No amount of persuasion, for instance, is going to convince me that 312.12.143.8 is a valid IP address, and if someone tells me that it is, I *know* they're completely ignorant on the topic. On the other hand, there are lots of topics that are matters of opinion, and those are different. In most instances I'll listen. But really it doesn't bother me when people don't pay attention to my opinions - normally, it's not all that important one way or the other.
1 person likes this
@DavidReedy (2411)
• United States
9 May 08
I know what you're talking about all too well. I suppose to some degrees we're all guilty of doing it, but I try my best to be an objective listener, but you know, this phenomenon isn't limited to spoken language, a discussion poster--like here on mylot, might write "what are your thoughts on... but I don't want to hear views about..." meaning, that they don't really want to hear what you think, but rather they want to hear from someone else what they think.