How far would you go to help your friend?

Singapore
May 9, 2008 10:08am CST
Recently, a friend that i knew for quite sometime told me about his problem. He has financial difficulties. I heard the reasons he gave and i felt something was not right. So i decided to ask his wife and i found that he was gambling. He has made many empty promises to his wife, and she is deciding to leave him. I am trying to talk to my friend to get help to stop gambling, but he keeps telling me that he can quit anytime but needs money. Frankly, i do not trust him with money now. I know him for nearly 8 years, i do not know what changed him. I can only suggest him to get help to stop gambling..thats more or less what i can do and did.. . So how far would you go help your friends in similar situations? Or will you help only if your friend is willing to be helped or shows sign that he needs help? Could i have done more to help him out?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@magikrose (5423)
• United States
9 May 08
The problem with addictions is that they have to want to stop before they will really will and the sad truth about that is that they wont stop untill they loose everything they hold near and dear to there hearts. He really dosnt realise that he is addicted and wont untill everything he loves the most is gone.
• Singapore
9 May 08
Thats true.. but i wish he could forsee it.. But when it comes to gambling they believe that their luck will change and they will become rich... such thinking drives them to gamble..
• Philippines
9 May 08
one thing i learned of helping out specially to friends is just to help them to the extent you only can and do not push it too much to the point that it will crash you down..you are wise enough to consult the wife and wise enough not to give away money...base on my experience just this month..i tried my best to help out friends and they were actually couple..they got drown with debt and i help them to reslove the issues only to find out that they depended so much on me to the fact that their just using me at the end...the man wont work and just expects me to lend him money when they need it..they left me paying their debt as well because i signed up as a guarantor to pay their children's tuition..and they disappeared..so what i just can advice you is just stay sill and do not get carried away because you pity on them
• Singapore
9 May 08
Wow thats a bit a surprise..i am sad to hear that people such things. Good people getting exploited.. . Well angelofcharm i am actually not pitiful about him. He needs to find a solution to his problem or pay the consequences. It is just that i knew him for quite some time and he is not such as person who go into such habits...but i hope you solve your problems.
@marciascott (25554)
• United States
9 May 08
All you can do is really talk to the person, that half to want the help. there is nothing you can do to change that person, they half to do it on their on, You can talk to them to you are blue in the face. and that is it, they half to want the help.
• Singapore
9 May 08
Thanks for the advice, but somehow i am having a guilty feeling that i might have not done enough to help him..but logically i know that i have done what i should have.