Do you give up your bed?

United States
May 16, 2008 7:44am CST
My aunt just emailed me a couple of day ago to say she is coming to visit. This is a huge event in my life. First of all, I haven't seen her in about 8 or 9 years and secondly she is probably the person I admire most. Needless, to say, I've been on a rampage to get my house tidied up. Actually, I've gone and just about redecorated the darn thing. I'm quite pleased with myself and the results thus far. When she wrote, she said she would be staying in a motel, but I could tell she just didn't want to impose. I'd love to invite her to stay with us, but our accomodations aren't suitable for entertaining a guest. I feel bad, but can't rush out to buy a bigger place in time for her visit. When you have guests do you give up your bed for them? Do you put them in a spare room or do they stay somewhere else?
8 people like this
29 responses
@mirage108 (3403)
• United States
19 May 08
Well I would just get a big air mattress and put them in the living room. I know it is not perfect but it does work. also you could give up your bed for the living room and an air mattress. How long is she staying?
3 people like this
• United States
19 May 08
I would be glad to sleep on an air mattress or in the livingroom, if I thought she'd sleep on a waterbed thats on the ground. But being as she is older I don't think that would be the most comfortable thing for her.
2 people like this
@Hatley (157426)
• Garden Grove, California
20 May 08
As I have no spare room and live in a two bedroom apt. my guests would have to stay at a motel as there is no room in the inn at all. lol and both bedrooms are in use sooooo.
• United States
20 May 08
I have the same exact problem Hatley. Just no room for any guests overnight.
1 person likes this
@maddysmommy (16243)
• United States
16 May 08
Most definitely. Whenever someone older like an aunty or uncle or my parents, they get our bed and we bunk wherever. If my cousins visit then they bunk with my son on his bunk bed. We only have a two bedroom apartment but the is lots of room on the floor if we have lots of family visit lol.
1 person likes this
• China
19 May 08
good idea.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
My aunt is older and very proper. I don't think she'd like sleeping in a waterbed or on an air mattress. LOL. Or the floor for that matter. If it were children, I know they wouldn't care and I'd be all for it.
@mummymo (23709)
16 May 08
I think it is great that you are getting a visit from your aunt - specially as you admire her so much and haven't seen her for so long! I guess it depends on what you and your aunt want , maybe she wants some privacy or she doesn't want to put you. You should talk with her before she arrives and see what she really wants to do - if she wants to stay then yep I would probably give up my bed - well if I were fit to that is! If she would rather stay at a motel then don't be upset - just spend as much time as you can with her! As for me we don't have enough room for a visitor to stay - we used to use the sofa bed if we had someone staying but now i have to sleep in a bed of my own and separate from the other half so that isn't an option! If someone I know well is coming to stay then they stay with my Grandma who only lives a few minutes away and has 2 spare rooms. xxx
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I am feeling very anxious about this visit as I want to make a good impression. What she thinks of me means a great deal. Its kind of strange on her part though, because she has given me so little forewarning, which is unusual for her. She also has been very vague about her plans, how long she is staying, if she is visiting anything or anyone else. Usually she has her plans posted well in advance.
1 person likes this
@mummymo (23709)
19 May 08
It does sound funny that she didn't let you know earlier iand in more detail when she usually does - maybe she just wanted to make sure that you are ok and don't need anything! Do let us know how things go - won't you? xxx
@jcj_111776 (3221)
• Philippines
16 May 08
When we've got visitors, we have a spare bedroom for them. I'm not just happy with the idea when we have surprise visitors. It doesn't give me ample time to prepare the room the way I want it. Sometimes the only thing that I could do is to change the bed linens. But when my mom visits, usually for a week, my husband and I usually give up our room and she stays there, with our son. We sleep in the spare room instead. Sometimes my husband isn't happy about it, but I try to make him understand that my mom usually watch TV until she gets sleepy. And the spare room doesn't have one.
• United States
19 May 08
I love your avatar. Really cute. This visit is all very last minute. My aunt usually gives much more warning. I don't know why she is doing this impromptu like she is.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 May 08
Thanks.When I saw this avatar, I immediately liked it. But uploading it in this site wasn't easy. It took me hours to find out how I can upload a moving avatar. Fortunately, surprise visitors doesn't make a regular appearance in our house. There was a time though that my husband forgot to mention to me that his cousin will be staying with us for a couple of days. He just showed up one day and I had no choice but to make the spare room as comfortable as it gets, in a few moments.
@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
16 May 08
I would not give up my bed for my guests unless they are little children or elderly adults. I do have a spare mattress at home. If they do not mind putting up with the mattress on the floor, I have no problem sharing my room with them. If my house is really unable to accomodate more than enough guests, NO, I would suggest that they stay in hotels. I do not want to be accused of favourism if I allow any one to stay over.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
Because our apartment is not condusive to having guests, I've actually considered paying for one of her nights at the motel. I think that would be the polite thing to do.
1 person likes this
@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
21 May 08
Wow.. I bet you made a good host :)
@crazeMD (196)
• Philippines
19 May 08
i give up my bed when my folks go for a visit. i'd sleep in the rolling cot instead.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
My aunt likes her privacy so I'm sure she will be ok with staying in a motel.
@clowdine (1402)
• Philippines
17 May 08
If the stay is too short, I would but if it would take long like a month, what should happen should happen in the first day. Our house is not that big to accomodate extended sleep overs as the only occupants are myself and my husband. They have to go home the same day. But for emergency situations, we can ask them to sleep in the next house. It belongs to my in-laws. It's big enough.
• United States
19 May 08
I wish I had the accomodations that you have, but unfortunately its just two bedrooms. Our place is pretty small
@hcpoirot (1562)
• Indonesia
17 May 08
Depend on who is the guest. If they were an important one like yours, i will give up my bed specially if the visit only for a few days and not weeks. If it was for family members i do not know well or regular friend, if I had a spare room I will invited them over. If not, they had to stay somewhere else.
• United States
19 May 08
My aunt is the kind of person that values her privacy and I am sure she would prefer to stay in a motel.
@KrauseHome (33210)
• United States
17 May 08
Well, right now my husband and I are only in a one Bedroom Condo, but we are in the process of getting it ready to sell and move into a 3 bedroom double wide. So we will have extra room then for people if they come visit, but for now when we had one person here visiting, they had to sleep on the couch, or recliner. If I were you, I would just play it by ear, and see how it goes. If she stays in a Hotel, you could still have plenty of time to see her I am sure. It might just be the way she wants it anyways since she had not seen you in so long, and just wanting what is best for both of you. But this sounds exciting. Enjoy your time together.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
My aunt lives alone and travels alot by herself. I think she would be much more comfortable on her own. She isn't the kind of person that would ever want to intrude. Either way, I am sure we will have a wonderful visit.
@vanities (11351)
• Davao, Philippines
17 May 08
nope..i guess she or he have to stay in the living room if i got a small place(one br only)...that is if she /he likes to stay..
• United States
19 May 08
I think most people that invite themselves already have plans for staying in a motel.
• United States
17 May 08
Well I do not get guest. I love with my family out in the kinda...country. We are far from most of our family and the reason too that is to not see them I guess. My father and my mother didnt want to get bugged by them. Long story I guess. So we are very lucky if we even get a guest but they do not stay.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I'm not sure if thats a good thing or not.
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
17 May 08
I never give my bed up for anyone. I do not like for someone else to sleep in my bed at all. I keep my bed and my covers very clean and I just do not want someone else to sleep in my bed and use my covers and my pillows. I am not stingy but that is my bed, LOL. I do let them sleep in the spare bedroon though. I do have an air mattress for them to sleep on in there. there is no room in there right now for a bed. I have made it into an entertainment and exercise room.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I hate when my blankets or sheets hit the floor. Immediately they have to go in the wash. If my bed feels the least bit grimey I can't stand it, so I totally identify with what you are saying.
@Rosekitty (19500)
• San Marcos, Texas
17 May 08
Katherine..this is easy since all my children are moved out on there own, so if anyone comes to visit there is 2 extra bedrooms for anyone to use! Plus the couch, and my Chase lounge..oh yes the floor for the young ones! They love crashing out on the floor!
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
If you have the room, it only makes sense to let someone stay with you. Unfortunately, we just don't have the space or the bed accomodations.
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
17 May 08
Hello KB If I were in your shoes... I would keep things as they are. 1) She did invite herself... so it is less of your responsability. 2) You have not seen her for 9 years. Your life has changed since then... and she might not be today what you thought she was when you were younger. People often give up their bed for family guest and sleep on the couch. I would only do that for someone I really love to stay with me. And it is something you can always do after she did spend two or three nights in the motel... if you feel it would be more practical. But do it because it would make you feel good. Don't do it to make her feel good while you feel like sh$t about it.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 May 08
She actually travels quite a bit by herself, so in actuality she is used to staying in motels by herself.
@p1kef1sh (45647)
16 May 08
We have a spare room, but no bed in it at present since a sleepover two years ago managed to break it. Well four teenagers using the bed as a trampoline was bound to have some effect. I don't think that we would give up our bed. The hosts need to be fresher than the guests. When my parents come down they stay in a local hotel. We see them every day, but they like to be able to potter about as the want. If it were my aunt, I'd probably put her in my daughter's room and my daughter on a camp bed in the spare room. Have a great visit though.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 May 08
The problem with that is that my son sleeps on an air mattress, which needs to be pumped up. I don't think she'd be very comfortable. I feel really guilty that I can't accomodate her, but I if I can't, I can't.
@gemini_rose (16194)
16 May 08
We never have guests to stay over. The only really close family that we have are my Mum and Dad who only live a little drive away from us, my hubbys sister who lives down the road. Plus all the other relations only live a little way away. To be honest we would not have the room anyway, we are pretty crowded with 6 of us in the house, and with 4 of those being kids, most of our relations would not be able to cope with it all!!
1 person likes this
• United States
17 May 08
Oh thats right, I forgot to mention that the other occupant of our house is a dog that sheds all over. I don't think my aunt would take too kindly too that either.
@dawnald (84126)
• Shingle Springs, California
16 May 08
No extra bedrooms but my older daughter has a double bed, so that's usually where guests go. I'm funny about letting people into my room...
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
Your own bedroom does tend to be somewhat private, doesn't it?
@Remmie7 (168)
• United States
16 May 08
Hello kbourgerie, If it were my aunt, I would make room and give up my bed to her. That's "Auntie" you're talking about. You expressed how huge this is for you. I also take it that she is very special to you. Sometimes we sacrifice for those we love. I don't know you aunt but maybe she really wants to stay with you and the family. Maybe this time around she doesn't want to stay alone, she just may need family around, and she doesn't want to say anything to you for "fear" that she would be putting herself off on you and the family. Me and my babies would be sleeping together while she's there, and just think how much fun your children would have. This would be something that they would remember because it would be fun to have mommy and daddy in their room. I have given my room up for my older relative. They get older and want to be around family. Enjoy her and keep her at you apartment. If you have sleeping bags that would be fun for the children also. I get the feeling that she just wants to be with her Family. By Every Means Necessary, that means staying in a motel.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I hear what you are saying, but when she emailed me, she said she would be staying in a motel. I have a waterbed and she's older. I don't think she'd enjoy it much or the air mattress in my sons room.
@KKKBsmom (1094)
• United States
16 May 08
I think it just depends on the situation at home!@ right now thow... I would invite them in... might have to sleep on the floor... but They would be invited and we wouls have so much fun! LOL
• United States
19 May 08
If I lived in an environment more condusive to having people over I wouldn't hesitate to ask her to stay here, unfortunately thats not the case.