Do you agree with LIVE IN before marriage?

Philippines
May 17, 2008 10:23pm CST
When i was a kid i've seen my mother as a battered wife. i grew up with that kind of scenario. i didn't think at all that there is psychological effects on me till i got my bf. i love him so much but everytime he talks about getting married it sees on my face that im not ready for it. or worst dont want to get married. now, im in a sort of live in thing with him. 3 days staying with him and a week staying with my condo.. is it fine doing all these things?
3 people like this
7 responses
@welshdai (77)
18 May 08
i think live in before marriage is a good idea,because if you rush into marriage and never live to together you do not know what you are letting yourself in for. but doing what are you,sound good,because it seem you can see him and stay at his and then go to your,if your situation is good like that there it show it work for you,i would rather live in with someone for a while before i got married.
2 people like this
@drakesuyat (1063)
• Philippines
18 May 08
for 8 years now, im not married yet. but we were blessed with 4 kids. my wife allowed the use of my surname to all of our kids. when someone ask me why im not married yet, i joke whenever i reply: "it will only give us a reason for divorce" but kidding aside, i love my wife and willing to marry her. i never said these to her but she knows from herself that i'll do that one day. trust is one of our best foundation why we stayed this far... we should get married. ;-)
@TrinaD72 (47)
18 May 08
its okay to live with someone before you get married. You could get married then realeased you weren't meant to be. Theres nothing wrongwith living in and notmarrying. my parents were together for 16 years and never married. Just cause you love someone doesn't mean you have to prove it by putting a ring on your finger.
2 people like this
• India
18 May 08
Nope i dont agree with live-ins. I dated my bf and got married to him when i thought i was ready. So better you be ready and go in for marriege, till then just get ur ready for it. Fell confortable with it. Whats the use of a live-in? is it a trail for ur love to c if it succeeds? Or may be seeing ur mom u think even u would be in that situation? Well you should know ur bf well and so you should know what type of a person is and he will be. Even in a live-in relation, things go wrong, not just in marriage. At least you would have a commitment and understanding in marriage, including the benefits of it.
2 people like this
• United States
18 May 08
no its not...cause what if something were to happen that could not be undone and he decides to split? then what will you do? no way. just take it slow...if you two really do love each other then get married and have a great and happy life. but don't do anything that could ruin it for you
2 people like this
• United States
18 May 08
I think you need to talk to someone professionally to understand the relationship your Mom had is not what all relationships are. Have you talked this out with your boyfriend so that he understands that it is not him the reason you are shying away from marriage but what your life was like while at home. What you saw happen to your Mom. It would help if you both went in together so that your boyfriend sees exactly what kind of impact your Mom's life had on you. He also will be able to help you see that is not marriage would be like for you married to him. I think if you talk openingly and get some professional help there will come a day that you will accept his marriage proposal and know that your life with him will be different than your Mom's with your Dad's. I lived with my husband before we got married so I don't think there is anything wrong with it. But your reason for doing this sounds like you are running away from marriage to your boyfriend. This is just my opinion.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164652)
• Garden Grove, California
19 May 08
honeyfyona only you can really decide if it is fine for you. we can suggest but I think that just living together is just to easy to live over the least little thing. I think being engaged for a lenghty time might be one way to go rather than live in, or else just make the leap into marrige and make it work..
@Hatley (164652)
• Garden Grove, California
19 May 08
typos again is just too easy to leave over the least little thing. Ithink being engaged for a lengthy time might be one way to go rather than live in, or else just make the leap into marriage and make it work.,