I don't want to be rich.

United States
May 19, 2008 12:46pm CST
I have decided I really don't want to be rich, or even have too much extra money. I know that I'm the type of person who would want to buy everything my children desire, and that me or my husband desire. Unfortunatly, if we did that, we'd no longer appreciate our belongings as much, we'd become spoiled. My neighbors across the street, they have a lot of money. They have 5 cars, the teenagers each have their own new car. The parents are nice enough, but the youngest child, an 8 year old boy, is spoiled rotten! He is so spoiled, he was pulled out of school and is now homeschooled by another neighbor because he was being picked on. For my son's birthday he recieved a skateboard that cost me $10 from Walmart. He was so happy with this. He ran outside to show it off, and the boy across the street basically told him it's a piece of (can't say that on Mylot). Over the weekend I went to garage sales, which I haven't been able to do in years because I had no vehicle. I ended up spending about $20, mostly on toys for my kids. Used toys that I know the boy across the street would snub his nose at. But my kids are so happy with their used toys! I love that about my kids. They are greatful for anything they recieve, used or new. They treat their posessions with care because they know mom and dad won't replace it if they break it. Our whole family is appreciative of what we have as far as material possessions go. I wouldn't want to be the type of family that has so much money to spend, that they actually snub their nose at purchasing used items. I love garage sale and thrift store shopping. I couldn't imagine living any other way, regardless of my financial situation. I do have goals, such as getting out of debt and fixing up my house, and eventually having better vehicles... but I don't want any more money than that. Once all that is done, all I want is enough to pay my bills, with a little extra now and then to treat ourselves to something nice, like a little vacation. So-- tell me your thoughts. Do you care about being rich and owning all these material possessions, or do you enjoy a more frugal lifestyle?
3 people like this
20 responses
@gemini_rose (16264)
19 May 08
OK katsmeow, I shall be honest with you here, I would love to have plenty of money!! I know that I would still be frugal to an extent as I love my charity shops and bargain hunting so I would still do that, but just to be able to pay the bills comfortably each month would be fantastic. I have my challenges that I enjoy at the minute, like sticking to budgets but also beating my budgets by trying to cut down on certain things, and I would still set myself them, but I would just love to have enough money not to have to do it if I fancied a splurge. I do not want to be rich, but I want to have a bit more money than I need!! Material possessions do not bother me, they bother hubby but I do not bother with them that much, but if I had loads of money, me and my daughter would be off clothes and cd shopping!!
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16264)
19 May 08
Do you know for the longest time, money used to burn a hole in my pocket too, I have now finally learned how not to let it!! Hubby has not though, cannot trust him with money at all. I said to him the other day " Without me, he would be skint and without him I would be rich" this is so true as well!!
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
Sounds much like my house. I get so annoyed at hubby whenever he talks about spending money. He's really big on the fast food kick. Always wants to get food or rent a movie or something like that, no matter how many times I tell him we're broke till Friday.
• United States
19 May 08
I always thought that's what I wanted to, and don't get me wrong, the idea sounds fantastic. The problem is I know myself too well, and I know that even $5 burns a hole in my pocket. I would not be able to stop myself from purchasing everything my heart desired, not to mention the kids. We would no longer be appreciative of our belongings. That is why I don't want the temptation of having money. At this point in time I am not disciplined enough to have a lot of money. Perhaps that's why we're broke! But I'm thankful for it.
• United States
19 May 08
Great question! I don't need a ton of money to be happy. I just need my basic necessities met with a little left over. I became disabled several years ago and can't work. At first I was devastated to not be able to earn money like I used to. When I was working I had a good job and could work some weekend overtime to pay for trips and such. I also went into serious debt not working and having no money coming in. Well, here it is a few years later and I am doing much better. I am thankful for the time I have with my 12 year old daughter. I do some work online to make extra money. I have finally come to the conclusion that success is not measured by one's wealth. I still wish I had a little more money on hand, but at the rate I am going I will be in a very good place in a couple of more years and will be content.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I am really glad you've seen the silver lining in your predicament. It is sad that most people don't. My mother went blind when I was 17. She had a decent job, was still on government help, but she was trying. There was a company that would help her keep her job, but she refused due to depression. That was over 10 years ago, she still does not work. She lives on disability and welfare, and does not make her money stretch. She buys fast food when her checks come in, and later in the month she is hungry because she hasn't budgeted enough for food. It's creating a viscious circle for her. I couldn't imagine living that way. If I had the opportunity to do something to help myself out of a situation like that, I'd take it.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
I think happiness is an internal thing. Once our needs are met, the rest is up to us. I do like earning a little extra online so I can do more, but beyond that it gives me something to do. After I get my debt paid off I will still do things online because I enjoy it.
1 person likes this
@echomonster (2226)
• Greenwood, Mississippi
19 May 08
Very thoughtful post. It's true that being rich brings its own problems, but I think the problems of poverty are much more severe. To me, the most important thing that wealth brings is security, not material possessions. If you have "just enough money" today, tomorrow you may very well not have enough. You're always teetering on the brink of not having enough. I'd rather not live with such worries if I don't have to, so I definitely aim for wealth. I've actually heard of some very rich people who live in a way similar to the way you want to live. They live in the same place they always have, spend their money frugally, etc. Many give their "extra" money to charity. I doubt they'd give up all their riches, though, because then they would have to worry about paying their bills, retirement, etc just like everyone else...and that's not pleasant! Material possessions can bring a lot of pleasure, but I think it's very easy to acquire for the sake of acquiring and not for the sake of use. Ultimately, we enjoy our possessions when we use them in some way -- even if "using" is just admiring a painting on the wall. To buy something and then just stash it away forever in a closet is a waste, and unfortunately that isn't something that only the wealthy do. I also don't think the value of an item is always reflected in the price or the newness of the item. Old things often have a magic about them; personally, I'm fascinated with old technology, especially old computers. If I were rich, I would have a huge collection of them -- actually, the computers themselves would mainly be quite cheap, but the space to store them all is another story! Still, I wouldn't buy so many that I couldn't spend time using and learning about each one; there would be no point to having the collection at that point.
• United States
19 May 08
I have been in poverty my whole life. No it really isn't fun, but I'm used to it. We are just now to the point where our bills are comfortable. We are still living week to week, but we have a little extra at the end of each week to put towards things we want or need, which we've never had before. I enjoy the point I'm at right now. I don't want to be better than this, and I don't want to be worse.
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
20 May 08
Same like u, i dun wanna be rich or rather too rich.. I just wanna lead a comfortable life with no debts and i'll contented be.. True, being too rich will make most ple forget their roots, and it's because of them being poor b4, that makes ple treasure and cherish things.. So, It also depends on how one gets rich too.. If one is rich by nature, from the family, naturally they will be spoiled somehow, and wun really appreciate family ties too..
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
19 May 08
all I want is enough to pay my bills, with a little extra now and then to treat ourselves to something nice, like a little vacation. That is exactly the way I feel too. I agree with you entirely. If I were rich the taxman would always be on the doorstep along with so-called 'friends' asking for loans. I often wonder if some of the people with new cars, the latest in fashions etc. are really rich - or just overdrawn at the bank
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
That's a possiblity. My brother and his family do not live within their means. They have new cars and top of the line clothes, and they are constantly borrowing from someone. Sometimes I envy their lifestyle because it appears they have money, but when I think of all the debt they're in, suddenly my frugal life looks so much better.
@tigertang (1749)
• Singapore
13 Jul 08
I think it is good that you have decided that you don't want to be rich and are happy with having a simple lifestyle - enough to pay your bills and also have enough to treat yourself and family to something nice from time to time. Getting rich can be a very tough process and it's not for everyone. I think allot of people think they want to get rich and that often leads them into problems. These people want to have the lifestyle of being rich but don't have the financial discipline. As such, they buy expensive cars, big houses and lots of flashy cloths. Unfortunately they tend to do it by getting into allot of debt, which they don't always manage well. The sub-prime crisis is an example of how such thinking has put people into trouble. If you are content with leading a simple life, you have the potential to find allot of happiness. If you can be happy without having to buy more just to show a certain social status, it shows that you are secure enough with who you are and I think that shows a great deal of character. Having said all of that, I would encourage you to find a means of saving more money. This is not a question of getting rich but I think, being prepared for a rainy day. These days employment is not what it used to be and you need to have the security of savings in the bank to ensure that you can continue living the decent life that you want to lead.
• United States
28 Jun 08
You have the right attitude as far as being grateful for what you have and teaching your children to be grateful too. Even if you did have lots of extra money you probably wouldn't spend it needlessly because you don't think that way. You would still teach your kids the value of a dollar and how to save and be careful about spending. My husband and I had nothing when we got married and we pinched every penny for years after the kids came along. Our kids learned the value of the dollar even after we began to do better and have more. It's all in how you look at it. I know there are a lot of spoiled people out there, we've had people look down on us through the years for not having the biggest house or the best cars but we don't care. We are happy we have what we do and don't want to spend every dollar on things. No matter where the road takes you, rich or poor, you won't change who you are inside.
• United States
28 Jun 08
That is very nice to say. Thank you for responding and letting me know I'm not alone with feeling as though I'm looked down upon.
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
20 May 08
i can't agree more with you... i myself prefer a frugal life rather than an extravagant one but have lots of debts... i hate debts and i never want to live above my means... i am happier to live as i am now... earning enough to pay all my bills and living expenses and still have extra money for some entertainment and vacations... that's all... also, i wish that i can bring up my children in a decent manner and give them proper education... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
20 May 08
i can understand. too much money can spoil children we all try to have the amount that is good for us. extra ordinary rich people are just like that.
1 person likes this
@ersmommy1 (12588)
• United States
20 May 08
I think this is sensible. I also enjoy a good deal. I think it is better to appreciate what you have. And the best way I have found to do this is to earn it. Having goals gives me a sense of accomplishment when I get there. I would like for my daughter to have that same feeling. I would like my daughter to have a bit easier time, and she will enjoy it more having earned it. Money doesn't equal happy. I think too much is placed on money. Happiness is its own reward. How we get there does count.
1 person likes this
@clowdine (1402)
• Philippines
20 May 08
You're right. We don't have to be rich to be happy. I am also at peace with this simple life I and my hubby enjoy. We don't have so much to spend but God never forsakes us. After all these material things and riches will all go to waste when we face our Creator.
@GreenMoo (11834)
19 May 08
I think if I got a big lump sum now I would use it towards setting up a business so that I'd always be responsible for out income in the future. I don't think i'd want to be rich either, but it would be nice not to have to worry about things and sometimes spend money without wondering what you can sacrifice elsewhere. I can't imagine all my frugal habits would disappear overnight. Many of my frugal ways are ecologically motivated as well as financially appealing, so they're important to me on more than one level. I find being careful quite interesting. It gives you the incentive to investigate different ways of doing things.
@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
20 May 08
I would love to have the bit of security that having money brings, but would never give up my garage/yard sales.. If I were a millionaire, I would stop at every yard sale possible.. I am a yard sale fanatic, I recently purchased a set of Davidoff's Cool Water for my son, I paid 5.00 for a set of cologne and after shave, both were the large 4.2 fl oz.. I gave it to him and he was so happy, he had run out a few days before and he didn't have the money to buy more of it.. This is one of thousands of great items that I have bought at yard sales and I wouldn't stop, even if I hit the lottery.. The neighbor boy may have a new item for but just a minute or two and then it is a used item also.. So he needs to remember that, any new item is just minutes away from being a used item, no longer brand new..
1 person likes this
@newht351 (74)
• Malaysia
20 May 08
i dont want to be millionaire.. yes, what i earn today sometimes is not enough for me..but of course, when i earn more, i will want to buy and spend more.. so, if u have 100billion, it will finish at the end.. my advice, keep moderate or u'll have to give up soemthiing else for the money..
1 person likes this
• United States
19 May 08
Kat, I am totally in agreement with this. I would like to be able to get my kids some of the things they want but not everything. I just can't imagine it. And I have never in my life paid more than $1500 dollars on a car because I bought all my cars used. It is nice to be able to go out and do something every once in a while but when you have money then kids just expect it. I would much rather have a family game night or movie night and just hang out than go out and spend a bunch of money for a few hours. You don't get as much from it in the long run. When you have a family night the kids will remember that. They'll even make comments like, "Hey, remember when you beat me playing Rummy the other night? I want a rematch!" And then it builds. But what does going out and spending money prove? I mean all the time. Sure every once in a while they appreciate it but all the time they start missing out on the meaning of it. It just doesn't make much sense to me. My kids love when they get anything...new or used because they don't get presents very often. Anyway, I completely agree that I would much rather not be rich but I would like to be able to afford the occasional family vacation or the occasional going out to dinner. Thanks for the post :D
1 person likes this
@cripfemme (7698)
• United States
17 Aug 08
I don't know why you say your neighbors kid was spoiled because his parents decided to home school him. If my kid was being terrorized in school I would have to find a solution to that situation. Including finding extra money to move him to a new school if necessary or enrolling him at a community based partnership like they have near my town where kids learn to teach themselves with volunteers. This is not an act of spoilage. However, the fact that he made of your son's skateboard that was his birthday present is just rude and no matter how much money I had my kid wouldn't act like that, at least not around me or they would get in trouble. While I sometimes enjoy new things and expect my kids to be the same way I hope that they will enjoy, as I do, going to thrift stores and looking for treasures. I think this is fun and they can buy more stuff because it costs less. Thank you for this discussion.
@cripfemme (7698)
• United States
18 Aug 08
It's true. You don't know how severe it was, but I know in some cases school bullying can be very severe. Maybe they tried to deal with the other kids, the parents, and the principle but got nowhere. If I had done all these things, which you're not sure they did, I would have pulled my kid out of school too because I know some kids can become self-injurious because of this. They can even make themselves physically ill. So I think that you might be wrong here. I was picked on when I was a kid too because of being in a wheelchair and needing to be helped with stuff. My mother told me that when people look at me or say mean things to me I should look back or be very good at sarcasm. I became very good at that and eventually found my own niche with my own group of friends who accepted me and all my difficulties. I hope his parents encourage him to try to work it out but as I said if it got too severe I would do the same thing they did. I guess you and I just differ in that opinion.
• United States
18 Aug 08
It is a known fact that kids are going to have some problems in school with bullies and such, it's just a part of life. I don't know how severe this problem was, but I get the idea from this family that it probably wasn't a big deal. This boy truly is spoiled, not just because he was pulled out of school due to a problem. Which is what leads me to believe this problem wasn't really that bad. I don't think pulling him out of school was the answer, because what's going to happen when he encounters something like this in the work force. Is he going to quit his job because someone is bullying him or making fun of him? He needs to learn these problem solving skills now. The mom should have gone to the principal and the parents of the other child/children to teach her child how to handle the situation.
• Philippines
20 May 08
Some of the humblest and most caring people I've ever known have thick purses. They don't flaunt their wealth. They invest them and give some of them to those in need. And it is possible to be wealthy and yet live a frugal lifestyle. One of my friends was born to a rich family, yet he prefers to live a middle class lifestyle. He'd rather invest his money so he, his wife and his children will be financially secure. He tells me that it's easy to blow a million dollars in one day, but it takes years to earn that money in an honest way. Some do not even earn that much in their lifetime. Being rich in itself doesn't make one bad or evil. The way one handles wealth shows his character and its depth. If a person becomes arrogant after striking oil, then that person really had it in him to be arrogant from the very beginning.
• United States
20 May 08
I'm glad some know how to use money wisely. I am afraid I would not be one of those people, which is why I don't want the opportunity.
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
23 May 08
if ever i am lucky and become rich i won't refused it instead accept it heartily but i am more careful in disciplining my kids that will not be like the son of your neighbor, some child although they show some attitude that is not good the parents have the responsibility to guide them and imposed discipline that make a child good.
@nice030481 (1109)
• Philippines
20 May 08
me, i want to be rich!!!!.. i want even once in a lifetime to buy all the things that me and my family needed. i dont want to stay as what i am like a chicken which is "isang kahig, isang tuka" or just work then eat, and thats all, nothing else to buy for ourselves. but i know its just a dream, coz the reality is i need to work and work and work, just to supply our family needs.
@lieanat (1137)
• Malaysia
20 May 08
Hi, katsmeow1213, Of course I want to get rich. And I know the consequences of having much money doesn't ensure happiness in life. Anyway, I will definitely try my best to teach my child and not to spoil them just because i have more money to spoil them. Thanks.
• Bulgaria
20 May 08
I would like to be only happy neither rich, nor poor. Some rich or poor people are bad or good. Some poor people are generous and compassionate or the same is with some rich people. There will be a barrier between rich and poor people. I would like to be in the middle. It is quite good to have enough money to meet the needs. But in deed I met some rich people who are trying to help the needy. Today I went shopping and I bought snickers and some kond of pants. I was very happy to buy dresses according to my lifestyle.