How old until a boy and girl cant share a room together??

United States
May 20, 2008 1:55pm CST
Ok so i have a set of twins... they are only 5 months old. a boy and a girl. Right now they are in the room with me for i only have a two bedroom and i also have a 6 yera old. BUT we are getting ready to move to a 3 bedroom and i know i dont have to worry about the babies sharing a room as of now, but we plan on renting this place for a few years until we can come up with money for a house of our own and then we will have then in there own rooms. But even now i get the look from people when i say the twins are in the same room. I know that when they get older its not "kosher" for a boy and a girl to share a room and i have heard from many different people that if they are such and such an age i can get into trouble if they are still sharing a room/ some have said 2 some have said 5. i was just wondering. Like i said right now its not a big issue but i would like to prepare myself of the knowledge for future references. Any one know or have heard of anything please let me know. thanks in advance!
3 people like this
15 responses
@ersmommy1 (12605)
• United States
20 May 08
They are only 5 months old. I think it will be fine for a little bit longer. I'd say around 2 years. That is when kids tend to start getting curious. How funny that people give you strange looks. I am sure they didn't look at you side ways when they were in the womb. And that is alot closer than being in the same room. We are talking about twins after all. It may even be healthier for them to be in the same room for a bit. Who knows. It might make them closer as siblings in the long run. Don't sweat it. You are the only one who has to walk in your shoes. Sounds like you are doing the best you can for the time being.
2 people like this
@foxyfire33 (10017)
• United States
20 May 08
"That is when kids tend to start getting curious" I'm just curious...my youngest are all boys so I don't have to deal with this anymore...is it really a bad thing for them to "get curious"? I don't mean touching or anything like that, I just don't see how it's going to be harmful for a 2 year old boy to discover that his sister doesn't have the same parts.
2 people like this
• United States
20 May 08
thank you for your response. Thats the exact thing i was saying to my husband... about them being closer in the womb.. Some poeple are just "ugh" i dont even know the word. LOL i know that growing up it was my brother and then 4 of us girls and my mom used to get hounded for having 4 girls in one room and my brother having his own room. now its complicated with boys and girls. i know there only kids but some people are just ridicoulus. thank you for your comment
1 person likes this
@sisterjinx (1136)
• United States
20 May 08
I had 3 children. 2 boys and a girl. They were right in a row. So I basically I had a 1 yr old, a 2yr old, and a 3yr old. We started out in a 2 bedroom, so all three were in together when they were very young. My daughter and youngest son were very close. They were like twins or best friends. When we moved into a 3 bedroom home, we put the boys together and gave our daughter her own room. At this point they were about 4, 5, and 6. Well my daughter would sneak out of her room and go sleep with her little brother. She missed him. It took months before this stopped happening. She just wanted to be with them and could not sleep unless she was. Eventually she learned that she could sleep in her room alone. I think that it is fine to do until they are about 5 but you might find it difficult to separate them if you wait this long. I think it is probably easier to begin the separation at around 3 because it gives them time to get used to it and learn how to sleep in different rooms.
2 people like this
• United States
20 May 08
Awe that was so sweet. Poor girl.. thank you for your input.
@kezabelle (2985)
20 May 08
I think its actually 7 years old thats in the UK though and only if its your own privately OWNED home if you rent or in council property then the eldest child can be 5 at the most before a male and female child should no longer be sharing, doesnt always work out that way and to be honest as long as they arent over 10 then I see no reason to worry and as for other people tell them to find their own problems to dwell on and leave yours alone!
2 people like this
• United States
20 May 08
thank you! thats just it i think some people are tired of there own problems and want to cause them for other people! thank you
1 person likes this
20 May 08
Well personally I think that 2 is definitely too young to have to worry about having their own room and even 5! I would say sharing up to age 7/8yrs old is fine and any person who gave me a funny look would be told where to go! lol After all it is only really when they start to develop that they need a bit of privacy and at the age of 5 that is still too young where I believe it is an issue! Anyway I hope it all works out for you and you do whatever you feel is best! x
• United States
22 May 08
Thank you very much for your response. 5 seems to be the age most people are saying i think i will go with that... I would LOVE to tell some people where to go but i have issues with doing so. sometimes i wish i could just say what i want instead of sugar coating it..! LOL thanks again!
14 Jul 08
I personally don't think there is a problem with girls and boys sharing a room. My daughter (13) has been sharing a room with her 2 brothers (12 and 10) since she was 4, and they still are. There are rarely any problems. Sure they fight sometimes but thats as far as "problems" go.
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
20 May 08
I'm not really sure about the age these days but I do know that alot of children are growing up and experimenting alot sooner than what we did when we were growing up. The children are maturing alot faster also these days. They are beginning to hit puberty alot sooner too. I would separate them once one or the other started maturing, puberty wise.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10017)
• United States
20 May 08
I don't know of a 'legal age' they'd have to be separated but I'm sure there probably is one. I honestly think that it's a sad world when people think sick thoughts about siblings sharing a room. Why would people give you 'the look' now?! For Pete's sake they are just babies and they both need you. What do these people expect, you to move into one room with the girl while your hubby takes care of the boy...how, I don't even know what word goes here I just know that would be very wrong. My personal preference would be to separate them at some point before puberty and immediately following one or both of them expressing that they need the privacy. To me it seems silly to separate them when they are really young since they'll be sharing a lot of things....makes more sense to have all that in one room rather than two.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 May 08
I have five kids (4 boys and 1 girl). THey share the master bedroom (it looks like camp in there, full of bunkbeds). Them sharing a room so far is not an issue, as they all change in the bathroom (alone), and they each have their own bed, and half the room is decorated for the boys, and half for the girl. Someday it will probably be an issue, but not yet (good thing, as I have no where to put the girl yet!)
1 person likes this
@newtondak (3950)
• United States
21 May 08
I would say sometime between 3 and 5 - but at least before they start to school. It is important for twins to have their own separate identities and having their own rooms with their own things can assist with that. I have seen on HGTV where they put a divider in the middle of a bedroom and each twin (they were also a boy and a girl) had their own designated half of the room, and the divider allowed for privacy in dressing or in time when they wanted to not be bothered.
• United States
22 May 08
thats a very cool idea. thank you !
@idowrite72 (2214)
• United States
23 May 08
I don't know that there is any set age that you have to separate a boy from a girl but I know that my son and daughter used to sleep in the same room until they were 8 or 10 by choice! They each had their own room, as did their 2 sisters, but sometimes they would sleep in the same room because they wanted to since they were pretty close. They were only 15 months apart and he was very protective of his little sister. When one or the other desires privacy they definitely need their own room, but I think that the age of 2 is young if you don't want to separate them then. 5 might be okay, but the choice is really up to you and how you think they are handling being together in the room.
@kassdaw (593)
• United States
21 May 08
I read an article somewhere in a parenting book, I think, it said that 3-4 years old is a good time to separate them into different rooms. But not over 4.
@sweetdesign (5151)
• United States
21 May 08
Right now you are fine. I would say after age 5 it would be inappropriate for them to share a room. I have known others to let their boy and girl share a room well past that age and I think it is just plain wrong.
@Logue92 (74)
21 May 08
Around 5, i dont think you should leave it any longer than that. Upto 5 they are so young it wont create any problems they will just look at it as a sleep over or something fun.
@Celanith (2334)
• United States
20 May 08
As a grandmother and having raised four children of my own and 3 foster kids. And now half way helping to raise 7 of my 12 grandkids. Kids of different genders don't really need their own rooms until about age 7 to 8 then they do need them. That is speaking for anyone in the USA. In some nations children share rooms up to the age of 12-14 with mixed gender. So it depends on your culture and society. But as a rule of thumb between 5 and 8 at your discretion. Anyone giving you odd or strange looks or comments before then has mental issues and problems and need to mind their own buisness unless they want to step in and offer to buy your a four or five bedroom house LOL.
20 May 08
Medically you should not have them in the same room together after they are around 18 months old, though in saying that it is a personal preference and depends on how much room one has available. If you go back around the 1960-1970's, when it was more common for families to have brothers and sisters in the same room together, a lot of the changes occurred due to welfare changes in society, which have steamed from Europe. Children's rights and for the most part changes within the law.
@Anne18 (11036)
20 May 08
I have a set of girl /boy twins. My twinsare now 8 years old and will be 9 in october. They still share a bedroom together and they love to share. I shall let htem share until they are 11 years old as that is the age by law when a brother and sister shouldn't really share a room togehher. If they fall out before then and want a room each then I shall do it before then. But I and my husband are quite happy for them to share until they are 11 as longs as they want to. We live in a four bed house, we have a 10 year old son(who can't share with his 8 year old brother as it just wouldn't work in our case) We have an 19 year old daughter who hasn't long moved out to a shared house so we do have a spare room now, but for the time being that will still be our oldest daughters bedroom just in case something happens with her job and she has to move back home. I don't think she will move back at any time as she is really enjoying living on her own as she can do waht she likes etc. So as longs as your boy/girl twins enjoy sharing then let them for as long as they wish to, but not after the age of 11. Hope this helps you.