Problems with my 6 year old

@cukal6 (146)
United States
May 20, 2008 4:59pm CST
My 6 year old has started whining...about everything. I swear he's whining about something the moment he gets out of bed. Whether is's about the food we're having, or there's nothing for him to do, there's nothing on tv...anything. I don't know what to do. It jsut started a few weeks ago and it seems to be getting worse. To top it off, my 3 year old likes to do everything big brother does. I have a headache everyday by noon. Does anyone else have this problem? Suggestions?
3 responses
@tessah (6621)
• United States
20 May 08
whether it will work with yers or not, i dunno.. but its worked well with mine. with tantrums or whining, or any other unacceptible behaviors.. i ignore it. and in the process.. ignore them, until they decide they are going to act appropriately. if something is demanded without a "may i please" attached to the sentence.. my response is " thats nice" and i walk away.. it only took 3 times of this for the manners to not be forgotten anymore. tantrums.. id step over (literally)my daughter, tell her i was ignorng her until shed finished with her fit, and to lemme know when she was finished.. and walked away, usually into the bathroom and shut the door. she didnt like being ignored.. the tantrums stopped after 2 weeks. whining.. same thing. i interupt them as theyre whining.. tell them i cant hear them if theyre whining.. and walk away. cant hurt to try it with yours.. see if it helps any. good luck
1 person likes this
@cukal6 (146)
• United States
20 May 08
We have tried ignoring, but he will get right in your face or, if that doesn't work, it turns to yelling. At that point we usually yell back. I know that's not the right thing to do, but you know how we can all get frustrated. I am going to try harder to just ignore it.
@tessah (6621)
• United States
20 May 08
thats why id go into the bathroom and shut the door. lock it if you need to.. then he cant scream in your face. yes, im wel aware of how frustrating it can be, and kids will test you on everything to find their boundaries. if eventually.. you end up caving in the longer he screams and yells, what hes going to learn is, that if he screams and yells long enough.. you will cave. DONT CAVE. also screaming in your face really is highly disrespectful.. and he needs to learn this now, or he will still be doing it when hes a teenager and beyond. as i dont know your son.. i dunno if hes the type of 6 year old that you can reason with and explain to logicaly different things or not.. if he is.. try that.. if not.. consistantly without failure.. punish him for unacceptible behavior. either a time-out.. or no tv.. toys taken away.. etc last resorts, a swat on the butt isnt going to do him any harm either. my oldest was way harder.. she for some reason couldnt grasp anything with common sense or logic, and spent a good deal of her time at home in time-outs and grounded. the little one however.. i can sit down and explain things.. reason.. and she understands why things are wrong to do and better ways to make decisions. unfortunately.. there isnt any owners manual on kids.. and its just a system of trial and error until you find what works with each kid individually.
• United States
20 May 08
I would sit down with him and explain to him in terms he can understand why you don't like whinning. You also should tell him that there will be consequences to his actions. I'm not saying spank him. But maybe put him on a time out after you've asked him to stop. Of course the time out can only be for so long. I believe they say a time out should be as old as they are. So in your case, he's 6, so that equals a 6 minute time out. If he gets up you have to start over from square one. Anyway.. That's what I'd do. Luckily I have a few years until I have to worry about it.
1 person likes this
@cukal6 (146)
• United States
20 May 08
We have done timeouts, and they usually work for a while. Then it's right back to the bad behavior. They've never really worked for him, even when he was younger.
@jonesy123 (3950)
• United States
20 May 08
Kids go through phases like that. Usually they have seen it work with another child: whining gets you what you want; whining gets you attention. He is six and should be more open to reasoning by now. Sit down with him. Ask him why he is doing it. He may feel neglected even though he isn't. Let him know that he is too old for that whiny behavior and that it is physically hurting you. Depending on what is bothering him offer to work it out with him. Let him also know that there will from now on be negative consequences for the whining. Be firm with that. First off, ignore him and only respond, if a request is made in the proper manner. Responding in any way to the whining other than ignoring it will tell him that there are results as in attention. If the whining continues like about the food, tell him to take it or leave it. If the whining about it continues, take the food away and tell him to leave the room. If he complaints about being bored hand him a cleaning tool like 'here, scrub the bathtub'. You can send him to his room with the knowledge he may only come out when he whined himself out as you won't listen to it. Things like that will quickly curb the behavior.
1 person likes this
@cukal6 (146)
• United States
20 May 08
I've never thought about handing him a cleaning tool. Good idea!