Cut Off From The World...
By twoey68
@twoey68 (13627)
United States
May 22, 2008 7:11am CST
As some ppl know my Hubby’s disabled. He has a degenerative bone disease that is slowly eating the bones in his back and hips. I’m not sure if it’s hereditary through his family or just something he has. For the most part he keeps an upbeat attitude and other than trying to deal with the pain and the limitations he doesn’t let it get him down and depressed.
I spend most all of my time with him…I am his link to the outside world. He can’t go out anymore except the short trip to his Dr. every three months. He doesn’t get to go shopping, riding around or out visiting b/c he isn’t able to walk more than a couple feet without major pain, he can’t sit for very long and riding can be excruciating for him. He spends most every day in our apartment either playing on MyLot, running around on the net or playing a game.
I try to keep him up to date on what’s going on around town with the ppl and the businesses so that he doesn’t feel so isolated from everything. Since I love spending time with him it’s not hard to do but sometimes I feel bad that he can’t go out and see things first hand.
Do you know someone that is housebound? Do you try to include them in things around them even if they can’t be part of it? What would you do if you were suddenly cut off from the world?
**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~
7 people like this
17 responses
@sunkissed (4330)
• United States
22 May 08
Well I can relate to what your husband is going through. I too have degeneratve disc diseaase in my back. I have had 4 surgurys and Have been disabled 22 years because of it. It too is eating away at my hips too.My sister also has it. I have a very hard time walking, standing and sitting. I too am very much shut off from the outside world. But your husband is very lucky that he has you. I live alone, rarley see many people, so I tend to get depressed at times, because I am very issolated.I do go to the docter every month. I am not home bound, as I make myself get out and go places when I feel up to it, but most of the time, I just do not feel like going any place.The thing is with me, I have no one to depend on, so when things need to be donem, I have to make myself do them, whether I fell like it or not..
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
22 May 08
Actually I'm glad you posted this b/c I needed to clarify that it is not degenertive bone disease but degenertive disc diesease that Hubby has. They wanted him to have exploratory surgery when he first was diagnosed with it, they gave him 60% chance of it going allright, he refused. He still refuses to have the surgery.
I have a friend in Texas that has it also. She did have the surgery, they gave her 80% chance of it going allright and she is completely wheelchair bound now. Before the surgery she could get around although it was hard...now she can't at all. She's had numerous surgery's to try to correct what they made worse but nothing helps.
I take care of everything outside of the apartment and most everything in it. I don't mind...I just wish he could get out more.
**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~
1 person likes this
@sunkissed (4330)
• United States
22 May 08
Well I am glad he refused the exploratory surgury, There is nothing that can be done for this. But the surgurys I had for for the ruptured disks because of this condition.I now have so many more problems, I have nerve root damage to the siatic nerves in both legs. It is very terriable.I am in pain 24/7. Now both hips are gone. I am too have surgry on both of them, but I have been putting that off.It is very hard when you live alone, and have nobody to help you. You are very wonderful to be there for your husband.It is very hard for those in our condition to make it on our own. I do not know how much longer I will be able to care for myself.
@Mirita (2668)
• United States
22 May 08
I think that is wonderful that he has you to inform him about what is going on with the outside World ,but it must be hard not to be able to go out. Why doesn't he go out with a wheelchair? I know people who happen to have the same disease as him who go out with the assistance of a wheelchair.
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
22 May 08
I've thought about a wheelchair but chances are once he gets in it he'll never get back out. My Grandma did that after her stroke. She was walking, although she had to be held by the arms, and then she got a wheelchair and she refused to walk anymore. Now she can barely stand. As long as he can get around the apartment, we can put off a wheelchair for the time being.
**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5016)
• United States
22 May 08
That would be very hard, twoey. I didn't realize this about your husband either. Do people come to visit often? I know lots of time people just forget about the housebound people. I think suddenly being cut off from the world would be terrible. I am glad he has mylot. I'm sure the computer helps.
@Angelwhispers (8978)
• United States
22 May 08
Twoey, I am sorry to hear of your husbands illness. It is hard for people who are shut ins to deal with the loneliness. Sounds as if you are doing a great job with not only being a wife, but a companion as well. I worked for home health for many years, and I have seen people shrivel up to nothing but shells for lack of stimulation and company. Hey Whats his mylot name? I am not sure if I have him in my friends list.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
22 May 08
Hello twoey, I really appreciate your care,love to your husband! I can say that you're a tough girl. I have known someone but she was mentally ill and her parents are taking care for her for almost 30 years, she just stay inside their house and they don't allow her to go out since she will harm kids. I don't know really the history but, our neighbor said that she worked in one family before as a housekeeper and maybe abused or rape and when her parents took her, she is not anymore responding correctly and don't anymore recognize them. ANyway, this situation is far out from your husband's situation but I just want to share!
Maybe if something will happen to me that will stop me from enjoying outside world, I will be happy to have moral support from my loved ones, like what you are doing.
1 person likes this
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
22 May 08
That is wonderful you keep your husband up to date on everything..Though I don't know anyone cut off from the world like your husband, but with only one car and our finances, I really don't get out much myself, besides calling my friends and internet and the TV, that is about what I get most of the time..
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
23 Jun 08
I am kinda shut off the world, Housebound,Although I like to stay to myself most times. I don't own a car ,I live out in the country 10 miles or so from town and only get to go to town usually once or twice a month and my only link to the outside world is my phone and internet. I do walk occasionally and I would love to have a car to get about when needed or wanted. I am sorry to hear about your husband it can be hard dealing with the pain of a loved one because you don't want them suffering or in pain. No, sorry I do not know anyone housebound right now my uncle once was when he weighed over 647 pounds. But he had surgery and lost alot but has gained some back but no enough to keep him housebound again. Yes I would try to make their lives easier and more enjoyable by trying to cheer them up and bring to them what htey can't go and get or do themselves. If I was totally cut off from the world(which when I had a slipped disk in my back I felt shut off because I stayed in bed all day for over a week and couldn't get up or do anything). I would feel horrible and probably do as your husband surf,write,keep in touch with family and friends via web and phone. Pretty much what I do now but I am not dealing with near as much pain as your husband is.
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
23 May 08
I am glad you do that for your hubby. It is nice that he does have a computer and can keep up that way. I have a son in a wheelchair, he is able to go, but not as much as he would like. I do alot of staying with him. I do include him as much as possible and plan alot of celebrations and parties at my house as it is more accessible.
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
23 May 08
I would have to spend more time here.
My hubby got where he couldnt go to many places with out getting very tired out after we found that he had cancer. at the last he even got where he couldnt or wouldnt go outside and stand like h4e used to do . He got to hold our grand daughter for 15 days then the last 5 he couldnt do that. adn he would run me in here when he got tired of me hanging around him
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
23 May 08
Im so sorry to hear about your hubby. I do know it can be really depressing. You sound like your taking good care of him.I have degenerative disc disease and just last week had surgery for it. And 2 years ago I had surgery again. I was told it is hereditary. I wish him all the best.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
23 May 08
My husband also has degenerative disk disese,and he has it bad,however we go all the time,he takes pain medication and that helps him do things..He also has diabetes,and he just takes pain medication..He goes to the doctor once a month for his medication,and he does fine,i am sure he feels bad at times but he is not housebound..Have you suggessted for him to see a pain management doctor,they could help him a lot and he would not have to be housebound...
@blackbriar (9076)
• United States
27 May 08
I feel bad that your hubby can't enjoy life the way he would like to but at least he has a great wife to help him out and clue him in on what is going on around town and such. Being a loner, I wouldn't miss the outside world but sure would miss being able to work out in my yard/garden and to be able to go hiking/camping if I was housebound. Other than that, I am perfectly content in my own lil world with my many voices to keep me company.
@newzealtralian (3930)
• Australia
25 Jun 08
It must be very hard on you too, having someone so dependent on you for most things.
I'm cut off from the rest of the world too, but that is more my choice than anything. I've never been very social and can find leaving the house hard due to the number of kids I have (though, they are well behaved when we are out!)
Personally, I don't think I'm missing out on too much. I prefer being home in my comfort zone and doing what I want to do. The time I do get out of the house is nice, but I'm always so tired for the next few days afterwards.
Everything I need is in my home. Anything that I need that isn't, well then I will venture out and get it. On average, i leave the house 2 times in every fortnight.
@jenleestan (68)
• United States
22 May 08
My boyfriend has a degenerative bone disease that is slowly eating at his spine and he was told that it is hereditary. His father had the same thing and we are to be cautious of our daughter. He also tries to stay upbeat but says that he is getting use to the pain 24/7. He had surgery about 11 years ago and I don't know or understand everything about it, but I think it helped some. He has been through so much with this ( and the painkillers that he was addicted to)pain but I am so proud of him everyday. I can only imagine as he gets older that his pain will eventually get much worse. Your husband is very fortunate to have you as his link to the outside world. I currently do not know of anyone who is homebound but I like to think that if I did I would make every effort to keep them company. You are a very patient and loving person! Best wishes to you and yours!
I imagine that if I were suddenly homebound I would find out who my true friends were.
@mummymo (23706)
•
22 May 08
Oh twoey that must be awful for your hubby! I can empathise to a certain degree as I can't get very far at all and don't get out a lot but I can sit in the car for a while or get to the shops where I ride in the electronic carts! I am glad your hubby has you to be his kink with the outside world and I bet he is too! If I knew anyone who was housebound I would definitely make an effort to do what I could to include them in things! I was housebound for several month so I do know how your hubby feels and I guess the worst part for me was not being able to do anything for my kids but I was lucky and had lots of friends and family keeping in touch and coming round to visit! xxxx
