Are you going to get mad?

angry - are you going to get mad?
Malaysia
June 10, 2008 8:48pm CST
Hi guys, I need opinion from all of you of one case that happens in relationship. I have a friend and she told me that her boyfriend always make the comparison with his ex-girlfriend. he always told her that "you are so much nice just like my ex-gf" "you guys are so much similar" and sort of those thing. She told me, for few times she could bear with that but she's burst and goes mad now on. So if your partner,bf or gf, or even spouse do that way, are you going to get mad?
3 people like this
16 responses
@rsa101 (14893)
• Quezon City, Philippines
11 Jun 08
Well that would be annoying thing. Maybe the BF should just be made aware that what he is doing annoys the GF. I think that the BF does not realize that yet and is not sensitive of how the other girl would feel.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
yes, for me it's really annoying. She told me that she already explain to him on how her feeling on that. But her bf seems to be couldn't understand and keep doing the same thing.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (14893)
• Quezon City, Philippines
11 Jun 08
Oh boy maybe another reminder perhaps....
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
she reminds him again but that guy in that big fat ego. They fight each other for that. I'm sorry to my friend.
1 person likes this
@lynn2457 (500)
• United States
11 Jun 08
maybe not the first couple of times, I would make a joke out of it, after a while and then I would be annoyed, and say go back to her. But, then after a bit, I guess, knowing me, I would ask him, why he compared me to her. Maybe who knows he still loved her, he was angry with her and did not forgive her, what ever it is, I would have to talk about it with him, so we could fix this problem, I am a talker, and I need to know the answer even if it is wrong. This gets me into problem sometimes, however. its me.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
Hi lynn2457, we could consider to hear such things if it's going once or twice. But if he keeps doing the same thing it's totally annoying!
@lynn2457 (500)
• United States
11 Jun 08
I think its a control thing, possibly, also.
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
I think he wants a girl with word of saying 'yes' always. Full throttle.
@jcj_111776 (3220)
• Philippines
11 Jun 08
I won't be that very mad, but I will be very irritated with my husband if he ever does that. I hate to be compared ESPECIALLY to his exes!But there were times he compared me to one of his ex-girlfriends. But he did it in a nice, tactful way. With your friend's boyfriend, she needs to have a talk with him. Tell him honestly that she's not comfortable with him comparing her all the time with his ex. Maybe in his part, he thinks it's just ok with her. I think when she finally tells him that she'll appreciate it better if he just avoids making comparison. That way, any conflicts in their relationship can be avoided, too.
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
she told me that he alway doing that, if it comes once for a while I think it could be considerable but when it comes to always she couldn't stand with that no more.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
11 Jun 08
If she have already told him about how she feels, and he keeps on doing it... then he must have a reason for still doing it. Your friend should ask her boyfriend what is the point of him ALWAYS HAVING TO COMPARE her to his ex. What good will it do to their relationship? Maybe if he keeps on doing it on a regular basis, he must have some unspoken message that he wants or needs his girlfriend to know?
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
Maybe that guy is too greedy. He needs the two girls in the same time. I feel like smashing his head with the rocks. LOL.
@ieeko89 (1054)
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
Em, well if it was my boyfriend, I'll surely get mad. That was his past and don't compare me with others since he told me I'm the best among all his ex-girls*if the guy told the same thing to your friend* And i think, by comparing his current gf with his ex, seems he still can't forget about his exs which is hurt his gf's feelings. People don't like to be compared to anyone else. For better or worst, still, they are comparing us with someone else. Comparing is not good and i hope the guy will realize his mistake before it's too late and your friend will ask for a break. ;|
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
Hi ieeko89, well guys have their own ego. Well, i hope this guy could stop doing that because from what I see my friend plans to leave him. Serve him right!
@ieeko89 (1054)
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
Really? Yeah! Serve him right!! He gets what he deserve!
@lingli_78 (12844)
• Australia
16 Jun 08
i never like to be compared... especially with my hubby's ex... i will be very mad if that happens... me is me and i am unique... if he loves his ex so much, why doesn't he marry her and not me??? that's what i will be telling him... i definitely won't tolerate my hubby keeps on comparing me with his ex... one or two times are OK... but continuously??? no way... it is really annoying for me... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
17 Jun 08
Hi lingli_78, my friend already said that to his bf. She blown up madly. yeah, as a woman it's really annoying and hateful if we are being compared.
• Macau
12 Jun 08
of course i will get mad, the important thing is, if he think his ex-gf is very perfect, why he don't come back with she. in this case, your friend just like a scapegote, what ever how wonderful she did just can "like my ex-gf", so, to get mad is the suitable way to catharsis her feeling. what's more, i do not think that guy is a nice person who can care about others feeling.
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
i do agree with you. he always think for his own pleasure. He should consider on her feelings.
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
12 Jun 08
I dont think any woman likes to be compared to an ex girlfriend or ex wife so the guys should use some other comparison so the woman will get that he is pleased with her. this is really quite stupid of the man involved. he should know better than that by now. I would have told myhusband off if he had evedr done that tol me. but he never did.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
That's great! Your husband never did like that. It's kind of annoying when he repeated the same thing as always.
• Philippines
11 Jun 08
Of course, I will get mad. Once is enough in saying those things to your gf or bf. But if its always, its no longer appropriate and healthy in talking about it anymore. That means he or she is not moving on...
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
I think that man is greedy enough to have the 2 girls in the same time.
@ladym33 (11008)
• United States
11 Jun 08
Once or twice might be OK, but any more than that, and it is time to get angry. I would start to wonder if possibly the only reason he was dating me is because I remind him of his ex-girlfriend. I wouldn't want to be anyone's substitute.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
yeah, sure. It's fine if he did it once or twice. I think there's no such dumb partner or spouse in this world who don't get mad if being equalized.
@ReoTwo (194)
11 Jun 08
I would kind of get mad. But just mad enough to tell him that I don't appreciate being compared to his ex-girlfriend. And if I remind him so much of her, he can go back to her. Why did he change partners? I if we're so much alike. I would'nt even want to keep hearing about how we're different. I'm quite sure if she was to compare him to her ex, favorably or not, he wouldn't like it. Humans have so many characteristics, it's easy to find a few similiar ones between two people. He must just have a shallow knowledge of both.
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
From what I've known recently, that guy wants the both of the girl. I think he is greedy enough!!!
@Elixiress (3893)
11 Jun 08
I am not sure, I think that if it was the odd comment then I would probably not even notice it, but if it is a constant thing then I would probably say something along the line of "Well go out with her then" and would probably end it. I think that if someone is still constantly on about their ex then they are probably not over them and it would only be right for them to give them the time.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
Hi Elixiress, I do agree with you. this kind of man should be banned from our listing to be a boyfriend!
@Lock_Heed (210)
• United States
11 Jun 08
Never ever, ever ,ever take out your previous relationships onto the new one. There is no sense in comparing anyone like that if you no longer hold feelings for them. I see no purpose in talking about anyone i have broken up with regardless of reason. If I am with one person it is all them. I am married now but have always felt this way. Why bring up past relationships if you are happy with the one you are currently in? He should ask himself that.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
12 Jun 08
I feel like that man needs the two girls in the same time. What a greedy fox!
• India
11 Jun 08
If I were your friend, I would tell this guy to either beat it or get rid of his annoying habit. I don't know how your friend tolerates him. Nothing wrong in going mad at him. What he is doing amounts to mental torture. I suggest your friend ( is she really wants him) have a heart-to-heart talk with him and let him know how much his habit of comparing is annoying her. If he still doesn't respect her, she is better off without him. Imagine spending a lifetime with a man who compares his wife to his exes... LOL Cheers and happy mylotting
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
hi positiveminded1977, I do agree with you. It's totally a mental torture. I think that guy want a super woman who could endure everything that he has done but in the same time he doesn't want to understand on my friend's feeling. He wants a woman with 'yes' of word.
@ladysakurax (1163)
• Canada
11 Jun 08
Yes i would be mad. My bf would only talk about his ex'es if i ask him. But he would not do this to me. Maybe if it's once, I can let it go but if it's on a regular basis, I would tell him to stop that and me doesn't equal to his ex. If he couldn't stop mentioning his ex, i would tell him to go back with his ex if he can't get over it.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
Hi ladysakurax, that's good when your boyfriend really understand you very well. Yeah, I do in the same opinion about this. Why should he pestering around my friend while he keeps equalizing my friend with the other person.
@ayrin03 (318)
• Philippines
11 Jun 08
Definitely YES!!! It's his past so let go! WHy not let go of that.. His relationship with the past will be a past..It's different now. Talk to him because of his unethical doing. If he still acting like that, get out to the relationship. LEt go!
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
yeah, i do agree with you. If he couldn't stop doing that it's better to let fo for the sake of both party. i couldn't accept that too!
@snowy22315 (51134)
• United States
11 Jun 08
No one really likes being compared to someone else even if it's in a postiive vein. If I heard that all the time it would remind me that he is still thinking about her. I would say what's unique about me? Why are you with me now?
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
11 Jun 08
Well, my friend said he told her that he just sharing his feeling. but it's truly hurt right?
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