How would you feel when you eat with your boss?

@yenwie84 (1345)
Malaysia
July 9, 2008 7:06pm CST
I felt weird and uneasy when I ate with my boss. Yesterday, I had my first experience of having lunch together with my boss. I felt so uncomfortable. I think maybe my boss is a serious person that makes me have such feeling. I felt so hard at that time, I was trying to say things in manner,I was afraid if I said anything wrong in front of her. It was really stressed to eat with boss. Have you feel the same way before? Or you enjoyed eating with your boss? Tell me more about this...
5 people like this
31 responses
@subha12 (18453)
• India
11 Jul 08
i feel uneasy somewhat. its weird. i feel like i am not in the same class. but here the boss is like i don't feel so.
• United States
11 Jul 08
"Keep your distance, Chewie.. but do not look like you are keeping your distance. I do not know, fly causal." Try not to over think things. You have to appear confidant and calm. Generally, you do not have to say very much. It is best to remain silent and appear foolish than to open your mouth and remove all doubt, right? Don't put yourself under pressure to talk or be witting. Just eat and listen to your boss talk. Most bosses do plenty of that.
@msedge (4012)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I had ate with my superior before and i feel awkward.We were in a group health team and was assigned far from the city.She was a mean woman for me so i didn't like her and being with her everyday was a nightmare for me.I am glad i was able to have myself assigned in other place so we were not be together with her anymore.
@Hatley (164468)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Jul 08
as we all ate lunch together it did not bother me to eat with my boss. I guess if I had been alone with her it might have but not really as I liked her and she liked me too as far as I ]could tell. we in the library were a closed knit group almost like family.
• United States
10 Jul 08
I'm working in a hotel and every month we always have the employee luncheon wherein all staffs get together for a free lunch. The Managers of every department sit on the table and eat with all other departmental staffs. I'm the right hand of the General Manager and work closely with all other Managers. When I was still new with the company I also feel uncomfortable sitting with the Managers specially with my boss on the table. But as times passes by I've learned to overcome my shyness felt more confident and now feeling at ease with them. So next time you get the chance to dine with your boss just be yourself, take it as an opportunity that your dining with a VIP and enjoy every bit of it.
• United States
10 Jul 08
i had a boss that was weird himself. he would take people out to lunch so that he could get a free lunch but most people were miserable. i tried to avoid it because he was always misunderstanding things. too hard to get along with unless he was drooling over a young female. i was uneasy around him period. so glad i didn't have to have lunch with him. too he was unfair to some. he'd take some out to this expensive restaurant. then the next person he take to McDonalds. what a let down for that person. and he would promise to take some out and then take a different person. or he'd promise someone and they don't bring a lunch in that day. then he'd cancel at the last minute and they don't have a lunch. nice huh?
• India
10 Jul 08
Hi friend, I too had lunch with my boss.Even though i feel nervous,i enjoyed a lot in taking lunch with him.Its really a very great experience that i ever faced so far. I am happy about this. Have a nice day
@SHAMRACK (8533)
• India
10 Jul 08
Dear friend, My boss always eat along with staff it is like a party every lunch time. More over every fridays the lunch is sponsored by Boss and may some time our staffs also sponsor lunch, Moreover it is like a small party. As long as our boss is more like a friend and brother to staff nobody have any discomfort while having lunch with our boss.
• United States
10 Jul 08
It depends on the boss, really. I have one supervisor I've worked with at least once a week for the past four years. I don't think I'd mind having lunch with her, though I'd prefer eating with her AND some coworkers- make it a bigger social thing. I wouldn't want to try with a brand new boss, though. It'd be awkward and you wouldn't know yet what was safe to talk about.
• United States
10 Jul 08
I have no problem eating with my boss now. I work in a very small office of about 5 people and we have all became pretty good friends, so work doesn't really seem like work most of the time. well until they have to yell at me for something . But i did have a boss in the past that was very up tight, so doing anything around him was stressful, even eating. i bet it all depends on the relationship you have with each other. but i won't worry about it to much because i doubt anyone has ever been fired for being a bad lunch date!
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I got 6 bosses in the past and I can say that half of them made me feel uneasy and the rest were like my friends..LOL! SO, it depends, Those who made me feel uneasy were quite standard person,strict in a way and serious...I can remember like I am counting when I will chew my food and trying to strain topic in my mind before saying it and rehearsing line or responses in my mind before uttering those..LOL, I don't like to say anything that they will dislike and I do know, it's a weird experienced!
@cathylmg (283)
• Singapore
10 Jul 08
Lets see...hm...The last time I had lunch with a boss, I was pretty nervous, knowing that she had strong preference for certain subordinates. Which means that she wouldn't be eating with you if she does not like you. I had to be very careful in my words when I had lunch with her. It was real stress.
@Allie666 (60)
• China
10 Jul 08
I like to eat with my family, my friend or the acquaintance. I feel a little weird and uneasy when eat with the boss, though she is friendly. But it's also a good chance to communicate with her. :)
@weng_08 (282)
• Philippines
10 Jul 08
Hello yenwie, my boss is a very nice person and fun to be with. We eat out a lot together with my colleagues. We all get along since he doesn't really act like a boss. I think you should not let yourself be intimidated by your boss, or your boss should try to develop a rapport between the two of you. Try to start a conversation, it's about time to break the ice. I am sure he is a good person, otherwise, he wouldn't be wasting his time trying to get to know his subordinates. He won't bite, I promise.
• China
10 Jul 08
Well, It's hard to answer this question. My boss is a really good guy and treated person very well. All of the staffs want to share time with him. He also arrange sports twice a week to let everyone feel free while playing. I do not experienced of eating with boss personally. But I though the feeling won't be better. On a mid-autumn day ,My boss and staff were sitting together to enjoy this special festival in a luxury restaurant. Some of the staff felt not so good, including me. hehe..... Cannot utter the words to describe the situation I had at that moment , the only thing I could remember is I kept silent and ate .
• United States
10 Jul 08
I hate it! Doing lunch with my boss causes me alot of anxiety so I try to get out of it with any excuse I can think of. When I was interviewing for a previous job I had the second round interview was a LUNCH interview with the president (the boss), vice president and CPA.....I wanted to throw up! Some people breeze through situations like these....I wish I were like them or knew their secret.
@eltmin (143)
• Malaysia
10 Jul 08
I worked in a small company, and it's our culture that we will try to have lunch together ( everybody including the boss ) everyday unless there is an appointment or field service. I feel ok, perhaps it is already a culture in our company, everyone pretty much gets together to talk during lunch hour. I think it is also a good practice, as we don't get to talk to the boss often, during work hours he is always busy. Lunch time is then used as our communication session, updates and discussions. Besides, if boss is available for lunch, nobody has to pay for the food...ahahahahahhaha :D that's the best part :P
@zion45 (70)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I have to eat with my boss everyday. We have a small office and are not allowed a lunch break. One person everday goes to get food and we all eat and work at the same time. I was uncomfortable at first but now I am okay, he is just one of the guys. I have a good boss though.
@luckystu (12)
• China
10 Jul 08
I have the same feeling .If my boss is facetious,I think I will feel comfortable.But if it is a serious one ,I can't let me relax during the meal time.
• China
10 Jul 08
I do agree with u. I had the same feeling at the first time. it was so weird to have dinner with boss. I even didn't know how to pick up a word to broke the silence.my boss is a male, and then i began to find topics to communicate with him, to asked some questions to seek advice.because this kind of way can show ur great respect and admiring to him. He soon felt that im a modest person and his experience relly benifit me a lot. now we have a very good relationship.