One simple question turned into an hysterical outrage.....

Your husband is out of control and you are being mentally abused. Thats no way to live life and especially in front of your kids. You may have to leave your kids temporarily until you can figure something else out. But I think you have to leave. As you can see this situation is escalating.

Hi cream! My dear, its time to leave. You need to leave if only for a few days, and that may mean leaving the kids. Your husband may have some issues he have to deal with, that has nothing to do with you. But is taking it out on you. It saddens me to hear the problems you are facing with your husband and your in-laws,it seems you're fighting an uphill battle. Maybe the best thing to do is to remove yourself from the situation for awhile. I hope that whatever happens, you come out on top.

You are in an abusive relationship. Call the police and tell them you need an officer on site while you and the children leave. Then follow up with a restraining order against him. The next thing is a divorce lawyer. Stay Safe and Stay Strong. Go to a Women's Shelter if you feel he will cause problems at your grandmother's.

This discussion is old and I just stumbled across it. I am hoping that by this time that you have figured out that the best thing to do is get pro-active. Leave him and take the kids...go to your nearest women's help center where they can offer you advice & legal council as well as protection. I have been in abusive relationships and I have escaped them and I have raised my children on my own. I fought back when threatened with losing my kids....there is absolutely NO WAY that any man...including dad was going to take my kids from me. I fought fair...they got visitation and it was a very open and fair visitation....not set at every other week but open. My goal was to not take the kids from him either...they need both of us! The courts agreed.

I don't what to say to you other than I am sorry to hear this. Has your husband been like this before, mean to you? What can you do about it? As this discussion is 2 months old, what did you do about it? Did you leave as he told you to or did you stay? Are things better now that time has passed or have you left him for good? I know what it is like to be in an abusive relationship as I just left one of 19 years, 5 months ago. Not physically abused, but mentally abused, which can be worse than physical. I got to the point I did feel worthless as he said. You need to fix this situation as it only gets worse, not better, if not handled properly. The biggest part of it is to get him to talk to a professional about his anger, but if he is anything like my husband, he won't go and you will have to then decide what to do. You need help, my friend.

I think that you should see a lawyer immediately. You should not put up with that treatment for one more minute. He can not just do whatever he wants with the kids. They are your kids too. Do not leave the house until you have spoken to a lawyer. Your husband is a brute at least at times and he does not have the right to intimidate you and make you feel afraid. If it's not working out get a civil divorce or go to mediation.

I am also scared. Things are going out of control. Do not get upset just keep your cool. Try to ignore these outrageous comments offered by your husband, who has so far been very much lovingly and faithful to you. Hopefully, this storm will be over and peace and normalcy will be restored soon. I really feel for you. But it happens sometime, probably, everywhere in this world. This is a part of every relationship. Just keep your cool and let this period of darkness be over. May God bless you.

excuse my bluntness,but what a freaking jerk. that's mental abuse,pure and simple.call the cops if you have to,get out of there. there's got to be a shelter somewhere that'll help you.he can't just take the kids,just like that.

Hi cream97! Pack your things and take the kids when he is not home. Find the time wherein you can do just that when he is out of the house or if he is sleeping but I would rather prefer that you do it when he is away. Then go to your grandmother's house or a friend's house and then find a lawyer who can help you legally. Take care my friend and be strong. God bless!

I agree with the other responders. As soon as he leaves to go somewhere take the kids and some clothes and get away from him. You don't need to live like that and your kids do not need to be seeing you live like that.

That's abuse, cream97, and you don't have to take that. You're worth far more than that. It's not love. The Bible has the perfect definition of love - "love is patient, love is kind..., etc." Love does not yell and scream and call a person worthless. That's abuse. If your husband won't get counseling, then I'd be telling him bye-bye. When I was in a shelter in Michigan about 5 years ago, I discovered that state and many others actually have laws that say that if a mother allows her kids to see or hear her being abused that the kids can be taken from both parents. Abusive words and frightening behaviors (just shy of hitting) are just as bad on the kids as on the adults. And some states feel that if a mother is allowing her kids to hear themk, then she is not fit to parent either.

Hello cream, am feeling so sad to hear about you. I suggest you should not give your children to him. Don't get scared have patience, everything is gonna be ok. Take care blessings!

hello there.maybe he said it because he is very tired. so you need to understand our husband sometimes.

Take the children and go. Belive me he does not want the kids he is just trying to get under your skin and it is working. Call the cops tell them what is happening. Belive me they will not leave the kids with him. Leave-it is going to get harder before it gets eaiser but its so worth it in the long run. You will feel like a weight has been lifted off your chest.

Cream - PLEASE contact a women's shelter in your area and get help getting OUT with your kids!!! PLEASE!! It won't get better, I promise you. His crap about YOU working on the marriage is typical of an abuser - they never see themselves as having a problem and put all the weight on you, blaming you, making YOU feel responsible for all the problems. YOU ARE NOT!! Please don't just talk about this - please do something. It will be hard. You may even go back to him at least once (I did, so I know). But, it's the start of your gaining strength to get away for good! YOU are not to blame. I swear to you that YOU are not to blame. YOU need to realize that YOU deserve better treatment than this. Even if that means being alone. I've been divorced for 19 years. I am so much happier now. I was on welfare for 7 years trying to get myself right again. You may not have that long in the modern system, but it's there to help you. They and others can help you connect with agencies who will help you recover. It won't be easy, but it sure will be worth it!