Difference in ages when dating...

United States
July 15, 2008 2:40am CST
Hi there all. I am kinda unsure of what to do about a certain relationship. I spend alot of time at my local YMCA working out and swimming. Well, I kind of noticed this one lifeguard who is cute and he seems like he kind of has a thing for me as well as I do for him. The problem is, that I found out tonight that he is 3 years younger than I am. This raises issues. I think. First thing, is that I am legal. 18 years old. and he is 15. Am I asking for trouble if I were to date him? and also too. My parents have been razzing me alot about this. I was very disappointed to find out the age difference, but in the same construct, is age just a number??? Am I wrong to still maybe kind of like him still??? I don't know what to do...
3 responses
@Barb42 (4216)
• United States
15 Jul 08
As a parent, I would not want my 15 year old son dating an 18 year old girl. Girls mature so much quicker than boys. If you like the guy, you should go about your life and let him grow up. Then see if the attraction is still there. And, you won't have to worry about the age difference, if he is 18 and you are 21. But to me, even those ages are wrong for a boy and girl, when it's the boy who is younger.
• United States
15 Jul 08
Yea, I agree with some of what you've said. It's been kinda weird thinking about all of it. I've never really had much of a problem with age difference, but I really just thought that this guy was either the same age as me, or difference by a year. If he were 17 then I wouldn't have had a problem with it. Even 19. But 15. I just can't get over that he's sooo much younger than me. It really threw me for a loop.
@ravinskye (8242)
• United States
15 Jul 08
i think to a point age is just a number. but i don't know if a relationship with him is something you should go after. his parents probably wouldn't approve which would cause problems in his house. i guess i'm kind of old fashioned though. to me, a 15 year old kid acts like a 15 year old kid and wouldnt have anything in common with an 18 year old. but i know that times are different now and kid are acting older. (i'm only 27) Plus if it doesn't work out between you he'll probably be heartbroken. and at 15 he probably isn't ready for a real relationship. but if you think that all that could work out between you then you could give it a try. i would check with the laws where you live to make sure though that you couldn't get into trouble considering the age difference. his parents could press charges against you if they were really against it. ofcourse with the double standard in this world it would be ok for a older girl to date a younger guy, but if things were the other way around it wouldn't be as accepted.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Jul 08
Thats very true. I mean, Im starting to think that it might just a be a little crush gone awry. It changes a lot of things now that I know that he's 15. I think guys at 18 are pretty immature, so how is that gonna work if he's 15? And you're right. He probably isnt ready for real relationship, and thats what I want. thanks for the response, and the eye opener.
@cryw0lf (1302)
• United Kingdom
15 Jul 08
Ha- funny really. My current boyfriend, i met when i was 15 and he was 18. Theres about 3 and a half years difference between us. If you think this guy is interested in you, i don't see why you cant try a relationship... I'm sure you're responsible enough to know not to take advantage of him because of his age. The problems might come with the parents though. They do not want their son to be lusted and left specially at his age. Just explain you're responsible and you care about their son as much as they do, you wouldn't want to see him hurt, or hurt him even. Don't rush into the whole 'but i love him' thing, just take it slow, as for a chance... Good luck :)
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Jul 08
Thanks for the response. I do understand all the issues surrounded with underage dating, but I don't think that's the problem. I think for me, the big problem is going to be my parents. They won't get off my case about him. And Im worried that if I did persue the relationship, that I would never hear the end of it. They made so many comments about him not being able to drive and about his parents having to pick him up. And his name is Nick, so they keep making comments like "Nick Jr." and stupid things like that. Its rediculous.