Getting a makeover

@Pose123 (21635)
Canada
July 16, 2008 7:55pm CST
Many times people try to change their partner, but Isn't that like telling them that we don't like them the way they are? Is it really right to want to give someone else a make over? I think the only person that we can truly change is our self and we might be pleased with the result. What are you thoughts on this?
5 people like this
7 responses
@Mirita (2668)
• United States
17 Jul 08
Yes, we only have the power to change ourselves for the better ,and we should accept people as they are or we are going to be very dissappointed . People can change ,but it has to be their choice and they need to be ready for change.
2 people like this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
18 Jul 08
Hi Mirita, Thank you for commenting. We agree on this. Blessings.
• Canada
17 Jul 08
I wouldn't even wish a makeover on myself, let alone on someone else. My husband and I both agree that we are fine just the way we are. We love eachother for the people we fell in love with, and we woudln't have it any other way.
2 people like this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
18 Jul 08
Hi danishcanadian, Thank you for commenting, I think that's wonderful. Blessings.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
9 Aug 08
I cannot change to be what someone else's wants me to be, so why do they want to do it anyway? They want me to give up my religion, believe that a practice is wrong when it is right, or right when it is wrong. I can lose weight, I can learn other languages, I can try to stick to something, but those are the things I can fix. The only one that can change me is God and HE is still working and it might not be for some people here to want it to be. Why it might not be what you expected.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
11 Aug 08
I always thought that when I get married, I will try to make my husband better and I had this dream of marrying a bad guy and by my own sweet nature make him give up his life of crime. I guess that was part of us women wanting to reform the men. Of course, it does not work. The guy won't change unless he wants to. That is why I cannot understand why my maternal grandmother was able to persuade grandfather to give up smoking and I cannot persuade my husband to give up buying lottery tickets.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
9 Aug 08
Hi suspenseful, Thanks for commenting. Of course others should never try to change us, we can only be happy with the changes that we want. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
12 Aug 08
As the saying goes you can never change another person. I think a lot of people are under the false impression that any negative habit or trait in personality can be changed if WE point it out to them...it just doesn't work that way. The only person that can change is oneself..and hopefully for the better. I had this experience within my own family members..my grandmother and mother....both were drinkers and to be honest could be downright nasty when drunk. I would talk to them (until blue in the face) about how their drinking was affecting them and of course me. But unfortunately both were real stubborn. They had an inner knowing that yes, they should change, but didn't, and the more I did try to make them change the more stubborn they were in refusing to do so.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
12 Aug 08
Hi pyewacket, Thank you for responding and for sharing your story. Blessings,
@faith210 (11224)
• Philippines
17 Jul 08
Hi Pose123! I do agree with you. We can not change anyone to suit us. We can only change ourselves. And in changing ourselves for the better, we might be surprised that when people see the positive change they might follow the same and change for their own good. We can only send positive thoughts and encouragement to uplift another person but we can never force them to change. Change must come from within the heart and mind and only that person can decide that he/she wants the change. Take care and God Bless!
1 person likes this
@faith210 (11224)
• Philippines
21 Jul 08
Hi Pose123! Thank you for the kind words and the BR my friend. Take care and God Bless!
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
18 Jul 08
Hi faith, Thank you for commenting. What you say is very true. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@jer31558 (3683)
• United States
17 Jul 08
I agree that the only ones that we can change is ourselves. We may can do things that will make others want to change,but that change must come from within...at least that's what I think.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
18 Jul 08
Hi jer, Thaat's a very good comment. Thanks.
• United States
17 Jul 08
I am very intolerant of relationships that do not meet my needs. If the other parties involved choose to believe that it is because they are not 'good enough' that is not my problem. That may sound callous, but if you go around making other people's problems your problem, and make decisions based on anything other than what will make you happy, then you are doomed to be miserable. On the other hand, anytime you have a problem with somebody else, it is not really about them it is about you, and the best thing to do in that case is to examine your own thoughts and beliefs and change the ones that are bringing you grief. Then what's happening around you changes without you even having to do anything.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
18 Jul 08
Hi zigzagbuddha, Excellent comment, Thank you. Blessings.