Do your kids think they're sneaky?

United States
July 19, 2008 12:55pm CST
My kids seems to think they can get away with whatever they want just because I'm not looking, or not in the room. I will often walk in a room and notice them scramble to hide something, then have this guilty look on their face because they know they did something wrong. They also seem to think noise doesn't travel, because I can hear them discussing what mischief they're going to get into. Yesterday I was in a fitting room trying on clothes, and they were standing just outside the fitting room. I could hear my younger son say to my oldest "No, because mom will come out and catch me". To me, trying to be sneaky is just as bad as lying. I often punish them for this because I will not tolerate them misbehaving just because they think they won't be caught. I expect them to behave the same way whether I am looking or not. Unfortunatly this just isn't working on my boys. I don't have the problem with my daughter, but my 2 older boys are continuing to try to be sneaky.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@ravinskye (8242)
• United States
19 Jul 08
my kids do that some. my oldest is 5 and sometimes i will catch her whispering something into her sisters ear and then her sister will either do it and get into trouble or she will tell her no. i don't like people or kids lying either. i've been working on my 5 year old since she was old enough to understand. i told her i don't ever want her to lie to me. i said she might still get into trouble but i will be a lot easier on her if she tells me the truth right off the bat.
• United States
20 Jul 08
I've done the same thing with mine, yet they still lie and sneak.
• United States
19 Jul 08
Well you must be doing something right, cause your son said, "No, because mom will come out and catch me". That's positive! Your son is manifesting an understanding that he should not act out behind your back. This could be the beginning of a good thing. It's ideal to think that children will be good behind our backs for their own sake. But that rarely happens. Kid's usually don't have a conscience about good or evil, right or wrong. Even after we tell them. In public situations, it's unavoidable that they are going to be sneaky. Kids usually have a different agenda than moms and don't understand why they can't just do every little thing they want to do. They'll still do what they want in front of you or behind your back. That's where the sneaky part comes in. My daughter knows better than to stand on the bed or get up in chairs. She won't do that in my presence. But she is more than happy to do that behind my back. Sometimes, I walk into her room and she is standing on her bed. And instead of making a big hairy deal over the situation (and reinforcing the behavior), I ask her, "Do you think that's what you really should be doing?" And she always, answers "No!" And then she doesn't do it again. Kids have to be sneaky, cause moms are no fun. I know that, cause I'm no fun! I wish I could jump on the bed and hide under the clothes rack at the store or pelt rude store employees with a spit ball. But that is not going to happen cause I'm an adult. If I did, I'd go to jail. Kids are kids once in their lifetime. Pick your battles. Not every sneaky thing is so bad. Of course, you should raise your children in the way that feels right for you. This is just the way I do things and not that it would work for every mom. So, I do respect your position as a mom and your opinions. I'm not trying to be discouraging. Best of luck with your kids. Wish me luck on mine!
• United States
20 Jul 08
We all need a bit of luck sometimes. I just find it frustrating sometimes.
@lilybug (21148)
• United States
19 Jul 08
My son tries to be sneaky when it comes to taking snacks without asking. He normally locks himself down in the basement on his PS2 or watching movies or playing on the computer. I will see empty candy wrappers and other things in the trash can by the computer all the time. I guess he is not too good at being sneaky cause he always leaves his stuff out in the open.
• United States
19 Jul 08
My kids do that too, although I think it's getting a little better (knock on wood). I find wrappers in the closet, behind and under beds, dressers, sofas, and most especially behind the toilet in the bathroom!