This just infuriates me..

@Ravenladyj (22992)
United States
July 31, 2008 8:57am CST
I'm sorry but I just came from a thread about children and bottles...and I'm ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED!! There is NO WAY IN HELL a child 3, 4, 5 yrs old should still be drinkingn from a baby bottle LET ALONE A 6,7, 8 YR OLD!! and what blows my mind on top of the fact that this is goin on in some homes is the fact that many responders were addressing the milk factor....YOU DONT NEED TO DRINK MILK TO GET THE NEEDED VITAMINS AND NUTRIENTS!!! but never mind that...WHY IS A PARENT/CAREGIVER ALLOWING A CHILD OF THIS AGE TO STILL BE DRINKING FROM A BOTTLE?? am I the only one that thinks this is borderline abusive?? I mean stop and really think about it for a second..if these parents/caregivers cant even do the best for the child when it comes to getting off the bottle what ELSE are they slacking on when it comes to their parenting responsibilities?? Yes I may seem harsh but holy crap!! lets get real here!!! thoughts?
18 people like this
52 responses
@rowantree (1190)
• United States
31 Jul 08
My daughter was drinking from a sippy cup before she turned 1 and my son was the same way. They didn't want to be associated with the baby bottle. They wanted to drink out of regular cups just like Mom and Dad do. My daughter even made sure to put her sippy cup on a coaster! I guess since Suri Cruise does it, everybody thinks it's ok? You have such a great point there about if the parents can't get a child off a bottle what else are they slacking on. That really does make you wonder, doesn't it? Don't you wonder what Suri Cruise is going to be like when she gets older? The tantrums and fits that girl is going to be having? She'll make Paris Hilton look like Mother Theresa.
7 people like this
@Ldyjarhead (10161)
• United States
31 Jul 08
I saw the title of that discussion, but never read it to see what the real meat of the story was, so I don't know if there's an underlying reason or not. If the child is clinging to the bottle at that age and has seriously not been weaned, then I agree there is a problem. If it's something that the child does just once in a while as a comfort, like sleeping with a stuffed toy, then I don't see a real issue with it.
6 people like this
• United States
31 Jul 08
Well..I would be more concerned about the tooth development of a child drinking from a bottle at that age? but I would not call it child abuse. Just possibly a need for some dental and medical education that a good peadiatrition could supply. I think attacking or yelling is the worst thing a person can do here? Better to be calm and provide rational and caring advice to parrents that may not be aware of the nutritional needs of kids and the fact that this can cause tooth protrusions that may lead later to braces or cavities. I believe these moms and dads love their children and are afraid that, when they take the bottles away, that the crying of their child means they are bad parents. They may have concerns that taking the emotional security of the bottle from the child could harm them emotionally. I couldn't call them abusive. I wuld call them uneducated in this one area and encourage them to have a talk wiht a good child dental specialist and their child's doctor, who can both help the parents realise that the bottles can safely go now. It is true that parents give milk after age 2, although it is not needed after that age. BUT calcium IS still important, and these parents may be educated wiht caregivers to understand that kids can also get calcium form sheese, brocali, yogurt and a variety of other surces? And they can be given a list to help them out this way, instead of giving no information to help...know what I mean? Simple information and guidance here is the key. Not judgement or blame..both of which do no good to resolve the situation. Frankly..if this is not going on with your own children, it's not your concern. There are medical professionals that are there to help this family. If you are not one..then take care of your children well and let the professionals do their work wiht these families. If we were all to take care well of our own, the world would be a less judgemental and nicer place?
5 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22992)
• United States
2 Aug 08
It is true that parents give milk after age 2, although it is not needed after that age. BUT calcium IS still important in all honesty..the ONLY reason an infant needs milk is because they arent capable of eating solid food...once a child is able to eat solids milk is NOT needed...Calcium and the other nutrients etc that come from milk are found in NUMEROUS other foods...... if this is not going on with your own children, it's not your concern. There are medical professionals that are there to help this family. If you are not one..then take care of your children well and let the professionals do their work wiht these families true enough, its really none of my biz but that doesnt mean it doesnt tickme off ya know...a parent beating a child isnt my biz either and I coudl take the stand that thats what the cops are for but fact is be damn if that sort of thing is goin to go on with my knowing about it and me NOT doign somethign or even just speaking up ya know....not to mention thats assuming their med.prof is even AWARE that this is goin on...who knows..it could very well be that the parent/caregivers intentionally havent told him/her because they knwo its not right ya know..
@livewyre (2455)
31 Jul 08
Sounds like lazy parenting to me, parents should be pushing their child to get away from nappies, bottles and all the trappings of babyhood at the appropriate ages. We all know little Jonny and Jane don't want to give up their dummy (comforter), bottle and nappies, but we have a responsibility to bring our children into adulthood little by little and each step is important. My guess is the same kids also still have nappies (diapers) and probably don't read books or play with anything that isn't electronic and does all the work for you. Ultimately these kids won't be relying on their parents for guidance they will look elsewhere - good luck with that!
4 people like this
@Theresam (1181)
• United States
31 Jul 08
I am not sure what the other thread was about. However you never know when you maybe jumping to conclusions. My 6 yr old son has autism and is only now begining to potty train-am I a bad parent. There are a couple of children in his school with some special needs that are still bottle fed at 4-5 years old. You never know what is necessarily going on behind the scenes and shouldn't judge someelse parenting decision.
4 people like this
@Mare73 (1335)
• United States
31 Jul 08
Hey I'm 34 and I still drink from the bottle! heehee. Ok in all seriousness, that is crazy! So we know who runs that house - the kids. My kids were all done with the bottle by the age of 1.5.
3 people like this
@tessah (6638)
• United States
31 Jul 08
soo ya think because yer children did something at a certain age.. that EVERY child everywhere should do the same thing and every parent everywhere should do as you did with yer own? narrowminded much??
2 people like this
• United States
1 Aug 08
Don't you think they need to be done at SOME point?
1 person likes this
@tessah (6638)
• United States
1 Aug 08
and it will be when the child is ready.. not like theyre going to be still wearing diapers or using a bottle in high school.. i dont see the need to force and harm the kid because others have decided there should be a specific age for every child when they do something. you ask ANY reputable pediatrician and they will tell you to let yer child grow and develop at their own pace and not to look and compare to other children, or what other parents do.
2 people like this
@SheliaLee (2738)
• United States
31 Jul 08
I saw that discussion but didn't respond to it. I have to agree with you though. That parent should have put a stop to that a long time ago. If the child pitched a fit then the parent should have just let her. The child would have eventually gotten the message. My kids were trying to drink from a glass if I was drinking from it when they were about five or six months old. I remember when my daughter would sit in my lap if I was drinking something she would beg for a drink and I would certainly let her have it, little sips at a time.
• Canada
31 Jul 08
Agreed! I made sure my daughter was drinking out of a sippy cup by the time she was 1 and a half, by the time she was 3, it was out of a plastic cup. Letting your children drink out of a bottle at any age over 3 is disgusting, neglectful and yes abusive. Like you said, who knows what else they are slacking on. Are these kids even potty trained? Do they know how to read? You cannot always give into what your children want. Just giving the child a bottle because they are having a fit and that shuts them up is not good parenting. You have to stay persistant and those few days of crying while being weined off is not half as bad as seeing an 8YR OLD drinking out of a baby bottle. Think of the harassment this child must get at school or from friends that he/she is still acting like a baby. By the time my daughter was 3, I had her weined from the bottle, her passifire, she was potty trained, could write all her ABC's, count to 100 and spell simple words. This is poor parenting and where I live, these children could be taken into child services for neglect. This is absolutely disgusting!
@kezabelle (2985)
31 Jul 08
Yes lets get real giving a child a bottle is not abuse!!! and I find it disgusting that it could be called that and no before its said my girls were both off a bottle by 2 years old. Personally i couldnt give a damn what other people do with their children and milk is VERY important until they are 5 at the least and while it can be got from other foods if the child likes to drink milk really what is the harm?? I think youre whole post was sweeping and judgemental, how can you judge how they deal with one small thing like a bottle and let it make your judgement on their whole parenting style?? I think theres a lot worse things people can do to their children then let them still have a bottle, im still shocked at you thinking its abusive im intriguied as to why you think that is abusive? do you have any idea what abuse is?? theres many different types allowing a child to keep having a bottle is NOT abuse it could be the child has a disability or the parent is just taking the easy route but its their child their choice!
2 people like this
@gemini_rose (16194)
1 Aug 08
Thoughts: My daughter will be three in December. She has never had a dummy, BUT she has a bottle, her bop bop. She also drinks milk, she loves milk she drinks about a pint a day and reading the responses on here if I carry on letting her have her bottle after the age of three or let her have milk then I am a bad parent? I am quite shocked actually at some of the ferocity of some the responses in regards to abuse and have to wonder at what exactly are peoples perceptions of abuse. It was quite upsetting to read some of the responses of how people see things. My daughter does drink out of a cup, but she prefers to have her milk in a bottle, maybe its her comfort, hell I dont care what it is if she is happy about it. Her teeth are perfect, the dentist says she has the best teeth he has seen for a girl of her age, she can talk perfect she can count to five, she can read certain words in books, she swears like a trooper and she goes to the toilet for a wee, on her own on the big toilet, she dresses herself. BUT if she wants to have a bottle then she can, she wont have it forever, as soon as she starts nursery next year she will probably throw it, just like my boys did with their dummies.
@kezabelle (2985)
1 Aug 08
I couldnt agree more! My eldest had a dummy until she was 4 two days after her birthday she woke told me "they are for babies" and she threw them in the bin herself she hasnt asked for one since, it was a happy painless process for all included and that to me is important. Yes im still shocked at anyone thinking a child having a bottle past the age of 2 is abuse think some people need a few lessons on what abuse really is!
@tessah (6638)
• United States
1 Aug 08
no kidding.. the people screaming abuse havent got a clue at all.. andmore than likely, dont even HAVE any kids of their own in the first place
@tessah (6638)
• United States
31 Jul 08
ya know.. i got ragged on horribly for still having my then 3 year old still on a bottle.. so i took it away from her to shut people up. she came down with a fever.. (not from taking the bottle away obviously) but i couldnt get her to drink from a regular cup.. she was delirious and was runnin a temp of 104, couldnt sit up, was choking on it. if id just given her a bottle like i KNEW shed take.. she wouldntve wound up in the hospital with dehydration. sooo i allowed her from then on to have the frigen harmless bottle to drink at night like id always done. my second daughter never got a bottle at all.. ever. i nursed her until she was 3. i see absolutely nothing wrong with allowing a child to drink from a bottle or use a pacifier or not be potty trained the second theyre walking. when theyre ready to do it.. they will. and there is less screaming and struggling trying to FORCE them otherwise. rest assured.. they wont still be in diapers or taking a bottle to school with them.
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22992)
• United States
2 Aug 08
they wont still be in diapers or taking a bottle to school with them. what about for sleep overs lets say....when your little one is a full time school aged child and assumign you'd allow her to go to sleep overs for a friends bday party for example or having a sleep over party herself at your house..would you put her in a diaper and give her a bottle at an older age?...these arent tots that I'm nattering about..these are older kids there is a HUGE difference...a 2,3 or 4 yr old is much different to a 6,7 8, 9 yr old..on all levels...
@tessah (6638)
• United States
2 Aug 08
then it is up to the parent and the child to deal with the individual situation in their own time, own right.. what of chldren who wet the bed and ARE and NEED those bigger kids diapers? ya know raven.. ive seen you b|tch and gripe and protest that YOU should be respected and left alone and not judged over the fact yer pagan which doesnt go along with mainstream ideas.. or that you have a husband and a boyfriend and people should leave you be to do yer own thing because it doesnt affect their lives.. how does this child having a bottle at night affect YOUR life?? who are YOU to turn around and do to another EXACTLY what you frigen scream about others doing to you??? just slightly hypocritical id say.. and it isnt the first time youve done this. take a look in the mirror and practice what you f*cking preach.
@vicki2876 (5640)
• Canada
1 Aug 08
Hi there, I know what you are talking about and I have seen it and think What? I got my three children off the bottle when they hit their first birthday. They can still get milk in a cup right? I let my children drink milk when they want and they drink it in a cup. They are healthy and doing good. I think it is lazy to keep your children on the bottle when they are school age and weird.
2 people like this
31 Jul 08
I know which discussion your referring to!! It irritates me too jut as much when I see children of that age with a dummy!! I can understand having a dummy up to the age of 3 or 4 and even then for nighttime use. children should not be allowed to have a dummy after the age of 6 for daytime!!! So these children want to be babyish, why not stick a nappy on them and send them back to pre-school!! I know sometimes parents/caregivers can baby there children, making sure they make the most of their childhood but this is ridiculous!! I think parents need to lay down ground rules about these things and stop allowing their children to make up the rules!!
2 people like this
@Pose123 (21671)
• Canada
31 Jul 08
Hi Ravenladyj, I am at a loss to understand why any parent who have their child drinking from a bottle at such an age. I would say that 3 would be max, and even that seems a bit old. We are supposed to help our children at each step in the growing up process, and this is one of the first. If the child is normal then the bottle should be gone by age 3. Maybe men think differently about these things, but for heavens sake, let the child grow up! Blessings.
2 people like this
@littleowl (7157)
31 Jul 08
Hi Raven..I think it is totally disgusting like yourself...I even hate dummies how the hell can a parent allow this?? When I had my children i didn't give them a dummie even to sooth them..they were off the bottle coming up 8mnths--I just don't have any words to say how disgusting it is to see or know that a child still drinks from a bottle at 3,4,5,-its irresponsible of the parent and they definitley need classes in how to look after their child..your friend littleowl
2 people like this
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
31 Jul 08
I must have missed that discussion. But I agree with you. It sounds a bit warped. Whatever are the parents thinking? It can most definitely affect how their teeth develope and lead to all sorts of problems. My 2 1/2 year old grandaughter was still on a bottle until a few months ago. My son filed for divorce, and has custody of the kids and the first thing he did was get her off the bottle. Her mom didn't seem to care one way or another about it. I know my son was using a tippy cup by the time he was about a year old. No more bottles.
2 people like this
@sunshine4 (8710)
• United States
31 Jul 08
I totally agree with you. I responded to that discussion and told that mother to get that bottle away from the child! I can't believe how she is letting that child control her! I wouldn't consider it abuse, I would consider it lazy parenting. It is hard to break a baby from the bottle, but letting it go 6 yrs is just plain lazy on her part.
2 people like this
• United States
31 Jul 08
I generally speaking do not like to judge other peoples parenting skills, but this does seem a bit extreme. Unless the child has some reason to need a bottle or sippy cup, at that age, I would say the children are running the home not the parents. Or they dont like messes, which is still not an excuse. I was probably a little bit more lenient than some parents, when it came to bottles and binkies. By age one, or as soon as I knew they could drink from the sippy cup, the bottles were all thrown away, and bottles in bed were never allowed. Binkies were allowed to age 2, then until 3 only at bedtime and never in public, after age 3 the binkie was cut and that was the end of it. I know alot of people dont do binkies at all, or want them gone asap, so I was probably more liberal. I would really like a link to the original story you speak of. I would be interested to read why these people are allowing such habits.
@neelygal (1022)
• Bahamas
31 Jul 08
yes i agree with you that is just ridiculous.i wish that i could find that discussion to read.where did you find it?i think anythin above 2 is just ridiculous.what are they thinking?that is just crazy.
1 person likes this
1 Aug 08
This is thlink to the discussion in question http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1629312.aspx Go and have a read x
@Barb42 (4225)
• United States
22 Sep 08
My goodness! Why would anyone in their right mind want to have their child using a baby bottle at the age of 3, let alone 8! That is pure neglect. I know children are different and they will do things at different ages. But, as parents, we have to help shape their lives and giving an older child a bottle is wrong! I guess they figure they can fill the bottles, put them in the refrigerator, and the child can just go get one when they want something to drink. My children, son and daughter, were both off the bottle at 9 months. I started them holding a sippy cup as quick as they could sit up. They would use it in the high chair. Later, as they got older, they got it more and more. And one day, it just replaced the bottle. I never had a problem with them. I kept them a drink just like I did when they took a bottle. It takes a little work on a Mother's part, but isn't that what we are for? I was at my mother's one day and a person drove up with their child in the car. That child was older than my children, and she was still giving him a bottle! I was shocked, but then this was a person who let her kids sleep with her and her husband for years! To me, that is another no-no!
1 person likes this
@franziska (411)
• Italy
16 Sep 08
...besides baby bottles ruin teeth and palate. I don't have kids but my father decided that I had to stop drinking milk with baby bottle when I was 1.5..and now I have wonderful teeth and I'm very grating to my father!
1 person likes this