How well do you handle difficult first reactions ?

@alokn99 (5717)
India
August 6, 2008 2:32am CST
How well do you handle those first reactions on the moments when you are stunned,shocked,raged, even a sense of disbelief or when something shakes you down to the core ? How difficult is it and how long do you take to get your composure back.
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9 responses
@mimpi1911 (25454)
• India
6 Aug 08
I am very bad with this, as bad as it can get! Even though I am trying hard I think I am the kind who would always take ages to recover from the setback. I used to get upset very easily, I still do and that's the reason I get unhappy easily. My boss says that we are not slaves to others ideas, so why should we get upset with what they think about us? They cannot control us in any way! Its true and I feel so much better thus. Alok, I think time is the best healer and its only with time that I kind of get over it. There are still age old scars which I haven't yet recovered from. It's tough but life must move on. Letting go is not easy and if or when we can do it we will live life in the true sense. Smiles...
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
A lot of us are bad at this Mimpi, even I am. Having said this, It's important for us to get our composure and our focus back as soon as possible. We do not sometimes realise the damage being done. We must try and take the means available to us to get our composure back, especially the with help of people around us. True that time is the best healer, but I think if we conciously try we can bring this time factor in our control and I'm sure that is what you are doing and will do. Thanks Smiling back
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@mimpi1911 (25454)
• India
6 Aug 08
Alok that should be it. I am trying, trying still. And its getting better. May be I am getting little more wise and sane.lol..
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
That's it laugh and smile ,keep yourself happy and enjoy doing the things that matter most. You will be out of it in no time. Thanks again Mimpi, and may you get all the happiness that you so rightly deserve.
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• Malaysia
6 Aug 08
depends what happened. If it's rage maybe the longest for me to compose back myself is a couple of days. Can't get mad for too long. If it's a disaster , the sense of disbelief probably would stay there longer..maybe forever..
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
Disbelief tends to stay the longest, especially if it is due to a disaster and moreso if it involves us or people we care about. Thanks friend for sharing your views.
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@lyzabelle (1668)
• Philippines
6 Aug 08
If i am in shocked i go into a motion of being immobile. Nothing will come out from my mouth. I just go statue like. But as the shocked wears of, I will be find then.
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
I know what that means like. I hope you are able to get out of it quickly. Thanks for responding and have a great day.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
7 Aug 08
Well I guess that like many people, sometimes my mouth tends to move faster than my brain and I say things without really thinking first when I am facing a surprise situation! I would like to think though that as I get older I am getting better at controlling myself in this regard. It is certainly not easy to always stay calm and it is actually amazing how differently you can feel about a situation even a few hours later than the event compared to when it immediately comes up! As for getting back my composure? Sometimes it can take me a while and it all comes down to the situation itself. But most of the time I would like to think that I embrace the "tomorrow is another day" mentality and wake up the next morning having moved on from the day before. But again, this is not always easy!
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
7 Aug 08
The "tommorow is another day" mentality is indeed the best way no doubt, not easy as you say. Sometimes getting your mouth to shoot off also helps, atleat it does not remain inside your head. Have a great day.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
24 Sep 08
Thank you for the best response alok! And yes Mickey, no-one is perfect at all. We just all tend to shoot of our mouths every now and then as a knee jerk reaction rather than taking a deep breath and thinking first! It's a challenge as we are only human, but it is far better to think first before we react whenever we can rather than explode and then have to go into damage control! lol.
@intimate36 (1416)
• Pakistan
7 Aug 08
Well, usually I keep cool, and never react immediately.But , there were one or occasions , when I was really shocked...
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
7 Aug 08
It's difficult to keep one's cool and reactions subdued. I appreciate the fact that you have been able to do so on most occasions. Thanks
@bamakelly (5194)
• United States
6 Aug 08
I have come to gain patience in my life as I grew older. It can be hard to deal with drastic news sometimes but I just know that I have to move on. Talking to someone can also help. There have been a couple of shocking things in my life that I took hard at first but then I feel that I learned to cope easier with things as time went by. It is also good to keep faith if you believe in it.
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
7 Aug 08
Faith goes a long way in the healing process.People around us and friends also contribute in a big way. Thanks and have a great day
@ketybhagat (4125)
• India
6 Aug 08
Fortunately I am a very down to earth person and can handle stressful situations with a cool mind. I become more practical instead of hysterical, so thats a boon.
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
I wish I could be that way, when it comes to handling my reactions in these situations. Thanks
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• India
6 Aug 08
of course... these are the emotions that every human has to handle. there will be many things that shock us annoy us,or put us down. if things are really annoying me,i first think or speak to myself and then react or respond. earlier i used to react very angrily,but my teacher once told me that a angry human is similar to an animal,from then i do not react and make decisions in anger or rage...
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
Rage needs to be controlled as soon as possible or it can make us become destructive. Glad to know that you are able to control yourself. Thanks and have a great day
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@riyasam (16578)
• India
6 Aug 08
at first i used to scream.now i have calmed down.i now keep quite and take deep breaths.it has helped me to a great extent.
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@alokn99 (5717)
• India
6 Aug 08
Screaming in a way helps to get those emotions out. Deep breathing certainly help in reataining your composure quickly. Thanks
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