What Is One Thing You Do Not Tolerate In A Relationship?

United States
August 8, 2008 11:53pm CST
even as much as i can get hurt, i want my husband to tell everything and anything that sets a big deal with our relationship (i.e. unwise monetary spendings, temptations at work, past relationships, etc). any relationship has to deal with a lot of tests that are set to challenge the integrity and the foundation of the bonding. so, if there is something i will not tolerate is to deal with LIEs that disposes to break my trust to my partner and at the same time could possibly replaces my love into hatred.
11 people like this
28 responses
@seraj143 (75)
• India
9 Aug 08
I can accept any circumstance, but the one thing I cant accept in a relationship is "LIE". I think it is the only culprit which destroys the Trust in any relationship, which I consider to be the foundation stone. Thanks alot
• India
9 Aug 08
I can't tolerate Lies and insincerity in a relationship. Other than these I am ready to adjust any shortcomings. For me SINCERITY is the basic foundation of any relationship.
@relundad (2311)
• United States
9 Aug 08
The one thing that I will not tolerate is non-communication. I am a communicator and believe that is the key to any relationship. I want to know everything and talk about everything on a scratch-the-surface level. No topic is too small or big.
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
9 Aug 08
Telling lies is the worst thing in any sort of relationship, because if they are telling lies then they are probably telling them to cover something else up...trust is so very important in a relationship, as doubts can drive you crazy...
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
9 Aug 08
I too would never tolerate dishonesty in a relationship. Nor would I tolerate infidelity either. It is challenging enough to keep a relationship healthy and exciting without having to deal with lies and cheating as well!
@debu004 (182)
• India
9 Aug 08
Wendhie I know you very well and I think you are a kind of person who can sought out things easily.If this is the problem between you both then you both can just take some time out of your busy schedule and just sit once to discuss all these matters to keep the bond between you both strong.You should express all the things that are within you to your husband and tell him what you like and dislike about him.And ask him to be honest with you.else whatever you mentioned is obvious from your side.
1 person likes this
@muxicka (216)
• Philippines
9 Aug 08
Maybe not being honest is one of them.
1 person likes this
@blanne (174)
• Philippines
9 Aug 08
One thing I do not tolerate in a relationship is the lack of communication. i believe communication is the most important thing to make any kind of relationship work. without that, the structure of your relationship wouldn't be sturdy and would eventually crumble..
1 person likes this
@liuqian (476)
• China
9 Aug 08
Lies,of course.This is the first thing i can't tolerte in a relationship.If your partner lies to you,it means he/she lost the most basic important thing in love--Trust. Honest is essential.I can't stay with someone who didn't treat me with his whole heart.If you wanna someone to spend life with you together,you should share everything with each other.That's what love needs and why it is so beautiful.
1 person likes this
• Singapore
9 Aug 08
I will have to disagree with that. If those lies are white-lies, I am fine with it. You doesn't want your loved one to tell you that the new perfume you are wearing is awful, don't you? Even if you found out that your loved one is telling you a lie, that the perfume smells fantastic even though it is awful, you will be happy about it - as he or she cares about how you feel. However, if the lie is a black one, like deceiving you that he or she is working overtime but she is in fact dancing at the club, then this kind of lie is not tolerable. But be warned,and recite this three times in your head - Seek first to understand, then be understood. I repeat, Seek first to understand, then be understood. Maybe she has some difficulties in her job and she just want to cool herself down by dancing? Yet he or she does not want you to feel worried about her, so a lie was made to cover it up? Just imagine that you lose your temper at her when she return hope, it will only make he or she break-down, with the pressure from you and from the work. So, before you even accuse anyone of anything, seek first to understand.
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Aug 08
Lying is one of my biggest gripes. I also do not tolerate my partner getting everything that he wants and he does not do a damn thing for it. Relationships should be "lying free" and "50/50".
1 person likes this
@IInsanity (290)
• Malaysia
9 Aug 08
i think, it is abuse. i will never tolerate any abuse from my boyfriend. such as scolding me, hitting me or something. i grew up in a bad invironment and i really don't want to relive that again. i'm glad that my boyfriend knows and understands me so well. happy mylotting, friends!
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Aug 08
I agree with you 100% about lies. Even though you may think it's the tiniest of lies and it wouldn't make a difference if your partner knew or not you should think again. Odds are it WILL make a difference and the tiniest of lies can spiral into the biggest of lies. My boyfriend have agreed that we tell each other everything, even if we think it's going to make the person mad or upset. I would rather be upset about something and work it out with my boyfriend then never know about it. By working out things, that is how a relationship grows. It's just one test of many in a relationship to see if you and your partner are truely meant to be together. For example recently this guy I was a little bit interested in during the time that my boyfriend and I were broken up just texted me recently. My boyfriend saw me quickly hide the phone and he was like what is it? I wouldn't tell him and just told him it was nothing. It spiraled into a big fight and I realized I should have just been honest with him. I was scared at what the text message said, and I wasn't expecting any message from him nor did I even think he had my number. My boyfriend finally made me tell him and he got upset mostly because I thought he couldn't handle it or would get mad at me. Turns out he got more hurt and upset that I didn't tell him versus if I had just told him. Since then we have been very open with each other about things and have grown stronger from it. When you talk about things that are part of a relationship, lies should not be mentioned. Lies are your best way to failure in the relationship in my opinion.
@cupid74 (11394)
• Pakistan
9 Aug 08
i would say Betrayal
1 person likes this
@rocker21 (2717)
• India
9 Aug 08
Being Betrayed and My other breaking my trust! Doing things tat i dont like not in front but behind my back.
1 person likes this
@mscott (1924)
• United States
9 Aug 08
I would think the obvious thing would be the other person cheating. If they are doing that then the relationship has problems with communication, trust, respect and everything else. If the person is cheating then the relationship is hurting in a bad way. I would think that would be the feeling of a lot of people and yet I know there are a lot of people who cheat.
1 person likes this
• India
9 Aug 08
well, as you well said, and as the other responses also indicate... LIES are something which I cannot tolerate.. among friends, AND releationship. talking that way would hurt my feelings badly, and would put the very relationship in jeopardy. IT would make me lose my confidence. And, from my side. I would never ever indulge in such foolish temptations, just for the sake of living. If I were to continue in the relationship. it might be with my life-partner. IT might be with my business-partners. IT might be with someone I share and spend an evening. My social-Partners. Goodluck
1 person likes this
@Stinto75 (79)
• Sweden
18 Aug 08
LIES I can't tolerate lies at all!!I hate lies and I feel insult if my partner lie to me. Everybody can make mistakes and the most important in a relationship is to be honest with each other..no matter what and the other mots important thing is to be able to forgive.
@zeny_zion (1284)
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
cheating. if you have a paratner who is a cheater live him. it wont make you happy. a person who does that is immature and irresponsible.
@subha12 (18453)
• India
11 Aug 08
one thing i do not tolerate is the lies that anyone tells. it can be chaeting from other person. it feels bad and it hurts more. sometimes i have seen that too much avoiding can also run relationship