I'm a stay at home mom and I'm loving it

@bieke81 (1069)
Belgium
August 16, 2008 6:05am CST
I have two little boys (one is almost 4 and the other 2,5). I wanted to stay at home when my first boy was born, but due to circumstances it wasn't possible at that time. After 6 months I got pregnant again with the youngest. When I found out I made the decission to work less (4 days in stead of 5), but it still was hard to not be able to spend as much time with them as I wanted. After christmas, in January of this year, I couldn't cope anymore and I told my husband I would stay home with the kids and since the second half of March I'm home with them. It's a bit harder financially wise but we do get there. And I love the quality time I'm spending with my boys. I'm so glad I finally get the opportunity to be with them. Who else made the decission to stay at home with their kids? Was it a good decission for you or are you more of a carreer woman and you miss your job?
7 people like this
13 responses
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
17 Aug 08
Good for you! You are very fortunate to be able to do this as for many it is just not possible. There is no doubt that your children will benefit immensely from having you there for them at all times at such young ages. I am sure also that the rewards you are receiving from this far outweigh the financial restrictions this may have created! I wish you the best.
2 people like this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
I do find it terrible that in many cases women are forced to stay working outside the home because of financial restrictions. I'm glad we made the decision in downsizing our needs so we could make this decision without any problems. have a nice day
@schulzie (4064)
• United States
16 Aug 08
I have 4 children myself ranging from 17 years old down to 3 years old. My mother used to watch my children but 4 kids were too much for her and she got sick so I had no one let to watch the baby. So I worked full time until I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with my youngest. After that I have not worked since. It has hit us hard financially but we are happy that I am home with the kids. I always wanted to stay home with them and thank God I now can enjoy at least 1 of them while she grows up. I have seen her take her first steps, say her first words, and I have a very strong bond with her. I remember that I never got those things with the other ones because I was always at work. I do not miss my job at all, just maybe the adult conversations and company during the day, but I prefer to be home with the kids! Have a great day and happy myLotting!!
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
I'm glad that, although I worked full time, they both gave me the pleasure of their first step and their first smile. I do feel I'm bonding more with my children now I'm at home and I do love that feeling. Have a nice day
@coffeechat (1961)
• New Zealand
17 Aug 08
My older boys are 9 and 6. The baby is 14 months. When batch 1 began school - I took time out of my busy home making to return to my career. This continued till my 14 month old was born. I am lucky that my skills allow me to work from home, and that our clients do not mind at all, as long as the work gets done. Next month, I will start to spend 4 hours a day at the office while the little one goes to develop his social skills and graces in a tiny tots centre. This way I am able to get the best of both worlds and I think this is the best decision I could have taken.
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
Yes, you do get the best of both worlds. I do work from my house too, but it's a little business of my own,so I don't have collegues. I do miss that sometimes, but I love my children more. [b] Have a nice day[/b]
• United States
17 Aug 08
We cannot deny working mothers miss their job and colleagues. I agree to that. But the decision to stay at home and take care of the family and kids is more important. If mothers can get the chance to work at home while taking care of the kids at the same time, that would be great :)
1 person likes this
• New Zealand
17 Aug 08
It is not about that new car, or the bigger mortgage. It is about investment in the children - It is all about love, values and self-esteem. We all have a limited window of time; perhaps till they are 12 or so when we have the greatest influence in their lifelong well being. I do not regret the decision to work from home, even though it means less money and lacks office socials (read politics!). It is every childs birthright to have parental presence and care.
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12551)
16 Aug 08
Hi bieke81 I went back to work when my first child was 6 weeks old and I hated it but I had to because I was the only one with a job at the time. I have now got 3 boys aged 3, 5 and 7 and have been a stay at home mum since my eldest was 18 months and I love it. Unfortunately the government will force me to look for a job when my job my youngest is 7 but I will refuse any job that doesn't work around my children's schooling!
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
16 Aug 08
What do you mean with: the government forces you to look for a job. If you choose to stay home, you can, don't you? Or do you get some kind of pay from the governement? Have a nice day
@Humbug25 (12551)
16 Aug 08
As I am no longer with my husband the government support me!
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
Okay, now I understand. It's great you have the opportunity to stay at home for a while even if you don't have a husband. have a nice day
@mykmari_08 (2466)
• Philippines
22 Oct 08
I'd love to be a stay-at-home mom and look after our only child but it isn't possible for now mainly because our finances wouldn't permit me. Currently, my husband and I do have separate jobs but we're still finding it very difficult to make ends meet. I have told my spouse several times before that I prefer putting up a small business in replacement for a full-time job in the office. He's okay with that. In fact, he also wants us to have a business of our own so that we could always be together with our daughter. Unfortunately, we lack the needed capital to start a business venture. Our child is three years old now and hopefully, we'd be able to save as much for our daughter's education before she even starts schooling. This way, I could personally teach and supervise her with her studies. I'm aware that preschoolers and children in their NKP (nursery, kindergarten, preparatory) years need as much attention and supervision from their parents and guardians. Anyway, I guess a great homemaker is someone who is always there for her husband and kids, aside from cooking meals for them, doing the dishes and laundry, cleaning the house, teaching the kids. Somehow, I feel that a great homemaker is more of a superwoman and personally, I wanted to be just that for my own family.
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
22 Oct 08
If you really set your mind to it, you will achieve it. You really will. When my kids were born I was sure we wouldn't make it without my pay, but now I know all the costs I had because I worked were paid with my money and we didn't have any more than we have know. Do the math you might be surprised. Have a nice day
@marina321 (4561)
17 Aug 08
Good for you bieke81! I am not a stay at home mum as circumstances did not allow me the opportunity although I would have loved to be one! It is the best job one can have I believe as the moments I spend with mine during leave and holidays are precious and sometimes I don't want to go back to work! If only we could live on love alone..aaaargh!
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
You are right, it's the best job a mother can have in my eyes. I'm hoping I can build my at home business to a decent level so I never would need to return back to work outside the house. Have a nice day
@maddysmommy (16236)
• United States
17 Aug 08
It was the best decision in my life to stay home when we moved from Samoa to the US two years ago, my son was four at the time. I was working full time prior to moving and family took care of him during the day. Now that he is in 1st grade this year, hubby wants me to go back working full time - finances are a bit tight and we over committed ourselves on a few things so I am looking into it. I really don't want to but I know I have to LOL I don't want to stray too far from my son since my hubby travels away most of the time (3 weeks here, 4 weeks away). we shall see.
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
maybe you can find work you can do from your house. You should look into that, maybe a daycare or something, you never know. That way you will be contributing to the finances and still be able to be at home with your son. have a nice day
@allurejan (197)
• United States
17 Aug 08
You know, spending with kids and watch them growing up is a great opportunity for me. It is the time you enjoy taking care of them, play with them, and see their development as they grow. I love kids. I know patience is needed all the time. You should enjoy the time with your kids.
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
I do enjoy my time with the kids, but they can be a handfull . I'm glad I have the opportunity now to enjoy being a part of their lives. Have a nice day
@shana123 (2096)
• India
16 Aug 08
My mom stays with us and she had really brought us up even when our family faced some financial support.. she brought me and brother good.. and we dint lack our mother's love at all.. even now she is with us.. and im stil dependant on her , its not less to be at home, kids need their mom and its a good oppurtunity for you that you made your mind to stay back with your kids.. You have got many ways to earn through net now a days then why worrying about money?You cant make much money but atleast you contribute it on daily needs..
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
I don't worry, not at all. My husband makes a good living, and we have cut in our expenses with the idea of me being at home with the kids. We don't have a large mortgage or an expensive car and we don't travel abroad, but we have everything we need, and a bit extra. I work a bit on the side to have more extra's but it's not really necessary. Have a nice day
@roque20 (518)
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
Well,i am still student here but i have plans when i have my family.i would like to have business or small business i mean so that i can take care of my kids and at the same time earn some money.
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
17 Aug 08
Well, that's what I'm doing now too. I have a little business that earns some extra cash (we don't need that money, but it keeps me busy during the hours the kids are resting or at school). I love to be able to be with them and still have word for my own. Have a nice day
• United States
16 Aug 08
I think that you made a very wise decision. If of course you can handle it financially. I myself am a stay-at home mother and I truely love it! Yes, I could be out there earning more money for the family but, we can survive on my husband's income alone and I much prefer it this way. There is always the possibility of a temporary position around the holidays, or of course the computer, to earn a few extra dollars around birthdays or holidays, if we need it.It is a good option that is open just in caes. But, to go back full-time, I wouldn't consider it if not absolutely necessary. Having the opportunity to raise your child yourself, witness all of the milestones and accomplishments, instill morals and is a wonderful thing. Plus, from my experience, I feel that Ive bonded so well with my children having all this time with thm. With my first three children I couldnt stay home with them.It was financially necessary for me to work and they were in day care.I still spent a great deal of time with them but it was definitly not the same.
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
16 Aug 08
You are right, it is so special to have this time with our children, they grow up so fast. Thank you for your input. Have a nice day
@relundad (2311)
• United States
16 Aug 08
I have one son that is now 9 years old. From a financial standpoint I could have stayed home if I wanted to. But that is not me. I like adult interaction, I like being productive and enjoy working. At the time that my son was younger I was still employed in Corporate America and decided to go back to work and employ a live in Nanny. I now own my company but don't regret my decision to continue working. I admire woman that have decided that their career of choice is to be home with their kids and if that works for you and your family then so be it.
1 person likes this
@bieke81 (1069)
• Belgium
16 Aug 08
It's everyones own choice. For me, I've always been more of a housewife than I was a carreer woman, so it never was a difficult decision. It only needed to be made at a time it was financially possible. If I would be more a carreer woman I never would have quit my job, maybe adapted it to my personal life, but that's just not me. I always felt guilty when I needed to leave them behind at the daycare. If I would have the opportunity to get a life in nanny, maybe it would have been different. Thanks for your input. Have a nice day
• United States
14 Feb 09
I love being a stay at home mom. I can go out when I want to with the kids. I teach them what I want them to learn. I feed them the food I feel is appropriate. Oh, I do plan to one day return to the classroom but if I can do so when they are in school I think that would be best. I can't say I miss teaching to be honest. I don't miss the paperwork. I think I'd miss the kids more if I worked. Even if I go back before they hit Kindergarten it will only be part time. We don't believe in daycare so we're never without our children.