How do you feel when someone comments that you are fat?

@smilyn (2964)
United States
August 21, 2008 7:40pm CST
All of us like compliments. Infact we all feel happy when someone says we are fit and healthy. But there are situations wherein we can face negative comments also. Ofcourse, it can be true, but they are what we don't want to hear. Nobody likes to be commented that they have gained some extra kgs or pounds. That too when they are conscious about their fitness. How about you? How do you feel when someone says that you have gained extra weight or become fat? Will that upset you?
11 people like this
39 responses
@zer0charly (5619)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
it depends on how will they say it.. if I find it too rude, and feels like it's teasing me, then I will get hurt, and get mad at the same time. I can accept criticism but teasing? I may not.. if my friends notice that I am getting fat, they will ask me first if I am doing things to gain weight, or if it is my intention to gain weight. if I ask why, then they'll tell me that I am getting fat and if it isn't good to look at. and I will thank them for that. then I'll do things to reduce fat.
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
22 Aug 08
That is absolutely right. If the comment is offensive and is meant for teasing, it should not be cared too. But sincere comments helps us to change our lifestyle and groom ourselves.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
26 Aug 08
yes. and constructive criticism will help us to improve more ourselves.
@jhaded10 (42)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
I am not that fat but I don't why people keep on telling me that I gain weight while in fact I don't feel any changes in my body... well I just realize that it doesn't matter as long as i am happy with my body and figure... :)
2 people like this
• United States
22 Aug 08
Hi , I am starting to learn that too , it is how we feel in our own skin . If we have confidence people will see that .
1 person likes this
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
For sure i will be upset. But i think it is a call for me to take precautions by this time. I would by then schedule my work outs and plan my diet. It is just a matter of discipline to strictly follow so i could be back to shape.
2 people like this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
Taht's good. You take comments in a constructive way.
• United States
22 Aug 08
i think its all the way people say things. some people are so critiacal. my best friend is like that, she saw a girl jogging and said good she should be to loose that celluite. and i'm being serious the girl was so thin and even if she wanst who needs your comments
2 people like this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
Yes, it all lies in the way people comment things. There are few people whose comments should never be listened.
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
Well, I've been fat as well and I had my share of smirks and insults. At first I felt bad about it, especially when it comes from my friend who only wants to put me down and then then tells everybody "Fat people are not disciplined at all". It was rather painful. But I've grown accustomed to it. I shrugged them away. I know I'm healthy, voluptuous and not fat, it's just that I have a different frame with other people which isn't my fault. Sheesh! I rather be chubby than skinny any day...
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
You have friends who wants to put you down..do you feel they are true friends..Anyways, being healthy is the important point of that. Some people may feel that they have extra pounds and they are fat. But they might be said by others that they are fit. So it all depends on the perception. Be healthy and be happy.
@iakulchen (615)
• Singapore
22 Aug 08
I read some time ago that a study was conducted some time ago that showed men and women react differently to being called fat. Most men react with humor, whereas women tend to view it as an insult. Myself, since I have been thin for most of my life, I take a comment that I have put on weight as a compliment.
2 people like this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Is that so? I think this is quite true..Men never care even if they are fat..But for women, she tries a lot to keep herself fit. When unattended, she puts more weight very easily.So staying slim is her greates concern. You are lucky that you feel happy to hear such a compliment.
@vanities (11351)
• Davao, Philippines
22 Aug 08
well i guess its a common knowledge that once our body is being commented into something not to our liking we are somewhat upset on it...thinking that all the effort to lose weight didnt work out..im not upset to the one whose commenting but to myself for not really working too hard to be fit..and even though it hurt me i will still welcome their opinion or comments regarding my weight or being fat..atleast somebody have the courage to say it..
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
22 Aug 08
You have a good spirit..You take the comments positively.I admire it. Taking the comment in a good way, helps to make you more fit and healthy. I think atleast after this comment a person can start a fitness regime. If the person already works outm he can change his style and the workout tools. Atleast it can help him to become more fit and trim.
• United States
22 Aug 08
well, even being pregnant I still hate it when someone says that I am gaining weight... even when my doctor tells me. I think he finally realized that if he says something like "your gaining exactly as you should be" I am fine with it, but if he says "I see you have gained some weight" or something along those lines, I almost feel offended by it. One of my old roommates told me once that if I were to get back to the weight I was when I met my man that my man would have competition. I told him that it was rude of him to judge someone just because the weight they have on them and that if I were ever to lose the weight (and didnt have my man) I wouldnt go to him anyway just because of the prejudgments that he had toward bigger woman.
@harips (106)
• India
22 Aug 08
uhmmm it depends man. if iam a slim guy and then someone tell me that iam fat then it feels good and viceversa. we have to take it in that spirit .
2 people like this
@diutay (1315)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
Well, I am fat and if someone tells me otherwise, I'll call him a liar. I do get offended sometimes if the way it is said is derogatory and in that case I'd retort.
2 people like this
@pkraj111 (2460)
• India
22 Aug 08
No chance with me lol. People comment me for being very lean and I dont take them seriously. Their comments are not going to help me grow fat,isn't it
2 people like this
• China
22 Aug 08
hey, smilyn! Yeah, our ears will never get tired of compliments. The torturing fact is that no one is perfect, we can never be satisfied in what we've got. Like a saying so, keeping fit is a career that a woman should hold in her whole life. Each holiday, i gain weight, which seemed like my habit. My mum often mock at me and says :" look!whos gaining some holiday weight? "If someone said I gained weight, whats the big deal? I'll try to lose it, thats all.
1 person likes this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
That is the spirit you have..But were you successful in loosing those extra weight that you gain?
• China
23 Aug 08
yeah..thats the question..i believe the key of losing those fat is to eat less and do more physical exercises and theres no other way healthier than this one, i guess, and i actually lose weight through diet for a whole week.. do u?
• United States
22 Aug 08
If I was fat and knew it, I'd probably be annoyed if someone blurted that out. How is telling someone that they're fat helping anything? I'd probably thank them for their concern and suggest that they join your fitness program for their own health.
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Commenting a person can help them to start a fitness program, though it may hurt them at first.
• United States
22 Aug 08
I don't see why it'd be hurtful. Everyone needs to exercise and maintain a healthy diet; and, if they're so interested in your health and wellbeing, they should be willing to offer their support.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
hi smilyn... nice picture we are partner cute little monkees haha hmmm for me i think at first i will be sadden if its the fact that i am gaining weight and someone notices...like someone saying hey "another meal you will get a love handle like me..." or "your close to having a love handle welcome to the club" but i wont take offense from it because its the truth and its said jokingly...lolz SMILE ALWAYS...^_^
1 person likes this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
You are right.when someone comments it means you have gained some weight remarkably.But it also depends on the person who says it.And by the way..That is something amazing.we both have similar pictures..wow..
@eloouuu (176)
22 Aug 08
From experience, I know that when you are being told that you are fat, it is not always true. I don't believe in sugar coating what I have to say. This doesn't mean I'll go telling fat people that they are the result of an obesity epidemic that is sweeping the world, but I will not tell them how slim they are if they aren't. That's even more destructive to somebody's self-consciousness. If they are fat, they generally know they are fat, and while being told they are slim might sound nice - at the end of the day, they're still fat and they have to live knowing this. However, what has been said is true - there are nice ways to tell somebody and then not-so-nice ways. It also depends on the intent of the comment - are they being told they are fat because somebody is concerned for their health or just for the sake of passing comment? I try not to let such comments bother me. I'm not fat myself, I've always been slender as I am somewhat predispositioned to it, and it's never been a problem. Even I've been told I'm fat. This is how I know that people will be cruel just to be cruel and with no real reason. I think it is less about being "fat" than it is playing on somebody's insecurities. There are things about myself that people pass comment on which I find hurtful but know they may not mean for it to affect me in a negative way. For example, I am very tall - 5ft 11in. Not the tallest person in the world, granted, but it was something I was made fun of for my entire time in education. When people exclaim, "Wow, you're a big girl, aren't you?" I kind of die a little inside. Still, no point from hiding from the truth. In some cases, "fat comments" are unnecessary and intentionally hurtful. This is when they should be avoided. But they can also be motivational. My mother lost weight because of the playful nicknames she used to be called. It shows that they can have a positive result. My Mom now fits into my clothes bar the 8in height difference between us. This is when they should be encouraged. In short though, I don't think that obesity should be tolerated by flattery. People need to be made aware that it's not "okay" to be grossly overweight and they should do something about it if possible.
1 person likes this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
That was a great experience sharing. Thanks for it. So the comments has been constructive with your mom. She had taken the comment in the positive side and had worked out. The comments has helped your mom to become fit. And leave aside those empty comments passed about you. They are meaningless. Just look out if the comments were passed by sincere friends. If so, take it and work about it. Some people just pass criticisms. They may have fun out of it. So when you hear their words, it means they have done their job good. So leave alone these type of comments.
@joliefille (3697)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
I was a very skinny girl before so hearing people tell me I became fat when they see me after 3 or 4 years is quite a compliment. However if I notice I do gain a few more pounds, that won't be a good thing to hear anymore. Especially if they begin to notice the bulging tummy because of the cellulite.
1 person likes this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
That is true. Gaining some weight can be good. But when you gain more weight, one day you will feel difficult to loose those extra pounds.
@mimico (3619)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
Well I'm a bit chubby so it's a sensitive issue for me. I'd always get hurt but I'm not into confronting people so I'll just be quiet and find a way to lose the extra weight. SOmetimes when I'm in the mood I'll even agree with it. But you know, people who talk about my weight in front of me are really insensitive and I wouldn't want to be around them! SO I'd avoid them at all costs and there'll be no future of friendship unless of course it happened only once and was part of a joke or something.
1 person likes this
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
23 Aug 08
People who give comments in a good way and for the benefit of us are the most dear ones. They help us to plan a fitness regime and start working out. Some comments really boosts us and encourages us to work out more. But there are peple who just pass comments just to have fun. If the comment is passed in a teasing way, it really hurts.
• United States
22 Aug 08
It's motivation to get out there and work to lose that weight. It's when people get used to it, or get comfortable being very overweight... If we would all just exercise a little it would do a whole lot of good!
@smilyn (2964)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Certainly, I have seen some people who are very comfortable with their weight - though they are overweight.
@halynn (1809)
• United States
23 Aug 08
I honestly couldn't care less what anyone thought about my weight.
1 person likes this
@lira23 (210)
• United States
23 Aug 08
How does it feel?..honestly it hurts, it stings, it makes me feel unwanted,unneeded, like I am a pig. It messes you up emotionally and honestly thats part of the reason why I dropped out of school because I got teased so bad, once I hit 18 I left, tired of being in tears and getting called whale and here comes an earth quake. If people would grow up then people would be less emotionally disturbed. I've tried diets and they fail all the time,then you sit there and beat yourself up over it because you had to much soda when you weren't supposed to while trying to be healthy, it is not that easy. To this day it still hurts when I think about those kids back in the school days.
1 person likes this