Down in the Dumps with a capital D

@gemini_rose (16194)
August 22, 2008 7:23am CST
Oh dear me, yesterday was GCSE results day for all the kids that had recently taken exams and left school, my son included. He has never had an easy time at high school, although very clever he found that he seemed to get more attention by playing dumb. Always highly strung and emotive he spent the last two years of school life being plagued by gangs of bullies, this had an affect on his school time causing him to have a lot of time off. Not to be deterred however, he was determined to give his exams his best shot, and I believe he did. I gave him a sweetner and told him that for every C he attained I would give him £5 GBP and I encouraged and helped him as much as I could. For the career he has chosen he needed to attain three "c" grade GCSE'S and so he went and picked them up yesterday. He had attained all "D" Grades. He was really disappointed, he thought he would have got the C's he needed, he also thought that we, his family, were disappointed in him. "Son" I said, "I am not disappointed in you, I am disappointed FOR you as I know that you needed those grades to get on your course". He is OK just down, he wants to go in the RAF you see, he has his entry test next week, if he had attained the three C's he would have got on the course he wanted which was an ICT course, now he thinks that he can only be a gunner. He says that is OK it was his second choice anyway but maybe they will offer him something else I guess we will just have to see. I am going to make him a cake tomorrow to show him that I am proud of him he did better than I did in my GCSE'S put it that way, gosh knows how the cake will turn out though, I have not made a cake from scratch for years!. So has anyone else recently had any exams and results? Or anyones kids just had any results back? Can you remember getting your results when leaving school? How was it and how did you do?
5 people like this
11 responses
• India
22 Aug 08
Hi Gemini.. You did the right thing, by making your point clear that you could understand the feeling of your son. This is the right attitude of a good Mom. Never allowing her son to get sunk in somber mood,trying to keep the spirits at higher level. One thing Gemini, If it is not ICT course, then we must channelize his feelings that some other course that is better than this, will suit his talent. Good to see that you did not allowD-grades to Degrade the spirits of your son. About making of cakes.. My goodness.. why you take a difficult test.. than GCSE.
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
LOL, thanx, I was disappointed for him, because he really thought he was going to get the C's but he had so much trouble in the last year of school it was not surprising it showed in his results. But he still passed, he can hold his head up high! Yes I have set myself a challenge up with the cake, will let you know whether I pass or fail!
• India
23 Aug 08
Gemini.. i have decided to hang on this topic till i get my share of cake..
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Hi gemini, [i]wow! You are very sweet and supportive! That matter most and I know he will really appreciate and love that support that you are showing to him! I am studying to get my learner's drivers permit but I am always online making a few cents so I do know when will I take it..lol! I wish myself luck since I am not reading it at all! Anyway, We had NCEE in our Country before and this time, they stopped it! The result of my exam will not qualify me to enroll for accounting course which is my first choice so I was disappointed but at the same time also understand that it was not for me,so, i took another 4 year course! [/i]
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
COme on, get offline and get that test done! You know you can do it!
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Aug 08
wow..I love the encouragement! LOL! I will soon gemini! LOL! Thanks for that!
@tessah (6621)
• United States
22 Aug 08
oh a trip down memory lane.. i left school my junior year.. making the choice of either paying rent or finishing my education while living under a bush.. i chose to live indoors. a bit later i found out when they were holdng the ged testing, and decided i was gong to finally take the exams and finish high school. everyone yapping at me that i had been out of school for 5 years, i needed to take the prep courses, needed to go to night school first, i would surely fail if i didnt.. but no one would tend my daughter for me so i could manage that ..;rolls eyes;.. so i scrounged up a babysitter for during the testing times (12 hours worth of exams over a two day period, lawds) walked in, took them, and walked out. out of the 300 or so people who took the tests that weekend, including the night school people.. i passed 3rd highest of them all finally attaining my high school diploma at the age of 21. ..;pats self on back;.. ive since gone back to school again.. recieved a diploma in paranormal science (with a solid 3.8 gpa, i phucked a couple tests and got 90`s stead of 100`s ) and am on my way once more after my bachelors in metaphysics, the final goal being a doctorate somewhere down the road. ive always told my kids they should do their best at whatever they do.. that their best was all they COULD do. your son earning a hard D is still something to be proud of, so hopefully he isnt too hard on himself. grats to him
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
He did brilliantly tessah, but he was just so sure he would get the C's he needed, but I said that when he goes for his test next week he just has to tell them what he got and they will tell him what they can offer him. He will get something I am sure of it. I have always told him that I am proud of him, no matter what, he tried his hardest and that is enough for me. I tell the others the same too. You however put me to shame mrs, heres me sits here saying I cant do this or I cant do that and look at you, wow you are very clever!
@tessah (6621)
• United States
22 Aug 08
clever how? ..;looks confused;.. wanna join me n loud and irish in chat? ..;ooks hopeful;..
@gemini_rose (16194)
24 Aug 08
Oh poo, only just seen this, you are clever because I said so, and I doubt that I could do all what you have done. XxX
@katsmeow1213 (29044)
• United States
22 Aug 08
That is too bad he didn't get the scores he wanted. Do your scores work the same as ours? Here an A is the best score, and D is nearly failing. My oldest is also a C average student, although he has pulled off A's now and then. I get rather disappointed in C's, because I know if he tried his best, he could do at least a B if not an A. He just has so little interest in school, and right now he doesn't care about his grades. I hope that changes and motivates him to try harder at some point. I don't think I'm going to have any problems with my younger kids. The twins both got very good marks in kindergarten. I think they are going to be A and B students.
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
They get scored A - G anything below an E is a fail above is a pass, but most places ask for a C to get on their courses. My son would have done better, but I guess schools do not make allowances for the nasty things in life like bullies that carry knives and threaten other students.
• United States
22 Aug 08
So your C and D isn't as bad as ours then. Here D is the lowest score you can get that isn't failing. There is no E, it goes A, B, C, D and F... and F is fail.
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
Here it is A,B,C,D,E,F,G and U, but not sure if it is the U that is the fail or the F,G and U.
@ellie333 (21029)
22 Aug 08
Oh Gemini-rose, I can feel how upset you are for him but he can still go on to do the test for the RAF and if he excels in that still go for his first choice careed within it. With all the hoohaa there has been over exam markings this year I would appeal the results anyway. D is still a pass though so congratulations to your son because it must have been real tough trying to sit his exams with the bullies starting on him, I remember you having to take him to school and let the teacher know just what had been happening and this was whilst he was trying to sit them so his has done extraordinary well anyway. I took my younger daughter out of grammar school because she felt pressured because she was living in her sisters A* shadow and the schools expectations of high grades and she took her exams at a state school instead and done really well with B's and C's. Unlike my first daughter she is more creative than acedemic and felt it was unfair for the grammar school to be 'bullying her to do A's just for their stats looking good. It was so long ago since I was at school that I can't remember how I felt really, qualifications didn't matter so much then either you could still walk out of one job and into another the same day, not so much red tape, rules or regulations then either. I hope your son enjoys his cake, however it turns out LOL. Ellie :D
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
That is what I said to him, it is still a pass. What my hubby said is that if he goes to the test next week and shows real willing and enthusiasm and does really well they might well make an allowance because they urgently need ICT people, they also urgently need gunners so either way if he passes the test hes in. I would have done the same as you with your daughter it is too much pressure on our children sometimes they are too young to cope with it all. I am going to have to let you all know how this cake turns out. I have got all the kit I need and I am quite looking forward to it, not been in the kitchen for properly for years!
1 person likes this
@ellie333 (21029)
22 Aug 08
Well you give him a huggle of luck from me for next week and have fun baking in the kitchen. Ellie :D
@mummymo (23707)
24 Aug 08
Oh sweety i am so sorry for your son - I know he must be devastated! With everything that happened as he was going to take his exams though I am surprised he got D's - he would probably have done much better without the stress that he had to bear! Would it be possible for him to go to college and resit the exams? If not as you say he can still go as a gunner - that is what my nephew wants to do but he wants to go the minute he is old enough - he is in the Air Force cadets and loves it. Even then perhaps the air force would put him through any qualifications he needs to get on his chosen course, I have heard of them doing such things in the past. Give your son a hug from me and tell him I think he did great just going in to school with everything that happened then! Hugs xxx
@gemini_rose (16194)
24 Aug 08
Thanx he is OK now, he is just going to go for his entry test on thursday and will take it from there. He did do really well though.
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
23 Aug 08
Well I remember my Sons and he was disappointed to but the Company still took him on In my eyes he did his best and no one can ask for more, my Son is like me verbally fine, put it in writing forget it, he gets nervous, where my Daughter did a lot better but she has a lot more confidence then Mike and me put together lol To be honest having good GCSE really does not make much difference my Girl had great results and she still did not get a Job for nearly a year as it was always experience they wanted, Mike walked straight into an Apprenticeship I can remember mine, mine where fine but not brilliant
@gemini_rose (16194)
23 Aug 08
Well this is my argument with the exams, how many of those that got A* will go on and get the career they actually want. How many will actually do anything with the results, it only boils down to the fact that my son needed Cs for the course he wanted, but I am sure if they really want him they will find him something else, they are desperate for people to join so he will get something. He is only one grade out, and he would have got it had he not had so much mither at school.
@kiran1978 (4137)
• Australia
23 Aug 08
Hey, so sorry to hear about your sons results. I know how much he wanted and needed these results to get into RAF. Check out all the options maybe there is something else he can do to get into this course. It is great how you are so supportive towards him, I wish my mum was like this. It is good how he does not need to worry about any disapproval from you, that would have been a huge weight off his shoulders knowing you are not diappointed in him. I hope the cake helps put a smile on his face and tell him not to give up on his dreams, anything is possible. He just needs to move to plan B. Let me know how he goes, will be emailing you later today. Take care. Oh yeah forgot to answer your question, I didn't do too well in my big exam in year 12 as I had too much on my plate, just finding out I was pregnant a few days before the exam. I failed this exam. However I got an alright OP score, good enough to get me into my business degree, luckily, then did my teaching degree. So things do work out in the end.
@gemini_rose (16194)
23 Aug 08
Hello! Hey, is that pic of your new hair do? If it is it is very nice, its a nice photo of you! Yes he needed a C to get on the ICT course, but I think he can get in as a gunner, which is still a job but just does not lead to a career and is much harder work. He has to go next week for his entry test, so I guess we will see what they say as he has to pass that first. I will look out for you email later when I get chance, have been busy baking will let you know how it turned out later, so look out for it! You did well to come through all you did and end up with a teaching degree, you should be very proud of yourself! XX
@mommyboo (13198)
• United States
23 Aug 08
I am in the US so we don't have the GCSE but my son did have to take a high school exit exam (CAHSEE) in order to graduate. He took it and passed last year, so he will not have to take it again. I think they offer it to kids each year starting with 10th grade. You get at least 3 chances to pass it, which is nice. It is disappointing when you don't get the grades you want or expect, but traditional school (and tests) are not easy for everybody. Plenty of people struggle with schoolwork and tests even though they are bright, creative individuals. Just remember that and remind your son of that too. I think he will enjoy the cake
@gemini_rose (16194)
23 Aug 08
Thanx and I think he knows that he did well considering, he was just disappointed in himself.
@snowy22315 (54643)
• United States
22 Aug 08
When my son was in school he passed the standardized test for US History proving that he knew the material, but he somehow failed the class anyway. i did not understand that one. I felt it was very unfair when he clearly knew the material. The result was that he had to take a summer course which of course we ahd to pay for. It was very upsetting. I think it was a way for the school system to get some revenue frankly.
@gemini_rose (16194)
23 Aug 08
Yes I sometimes feel that they fail things for no reason, one of the exams my son took, he failed and he was pretty mad because he said it was one of his easiest. However it needs looking into because the whole of the year have failed it.
@maddysmommy (16233)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I don't like to remember when I got my results for 5th for certificate because of how dissapointed my parents were. Even though I got 3 C's and 2 B's, it still wasn't good enough in their eyes. I actually never liked taking exams and even though my course work was good, when it came to taking the exam I flunked. I did better in my 6th form year which is all assessment and scored quite well. After that I quit half way through 7th form because I just knew I wasn't going to make it to University with my low marks so I went to work full-time. Several years later I did take a 2 and 1/2 year correspondence course while working and passed with A's and 1 B. Even when I was studying towards a Diploma in Business Administration in Samoa, I passed all 7 papers (towards the certificate) but was not able to complete the course because we left for the US. For some reason I enjoyed school much more better as an adult than I did when I was a teenager at school. You're a good mom to support him the way you did, because I bet he's going to come back wanting to do better next time. You just never know, he may excel in his second choice and move onto being one of the best gunners in his field. The fact that you are there by his side giving him positive reinforcement and encouraging him, says a lot to me. As for making a cake from scratch, I'll pass on that one. I made my sons birthday cake for the first time this yeah using a ready-made pkt and just add this and that and it broke in half and collapsed on one side LOL He was upset with me but he did thank me for trying LOL I ain't doing that again - to see that look of dissapointment on my son's face, no way, I'll be ordering from now on.
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Aug 08
Gosh I wish I had attained C's and B's that is fantastic, I would have been well pleased if you were my daughter. It does not matter to me as long as someone tries their best. You did really well though. I support him, even though I am not completely thrilled about him wanting to go in the forces I will support him and he will never know that I am sad that he wants to go. He does not know about the cake, so if it does go wrong then I will make it into something else, it is my saturday challenge, I will let you know how it goes good or bad!
1 person likes this