I quit!

@keasling (724)
United States
August 24, 2008 12:08pm CST
Yeppers! I have had it with the roomie and my children thinking I am supposed to cook and clean for them. I am no longer cooking dinners. I cooked last night after being just we are hungry every five minutes. The roomie is 22 she can cook if she is hungry. Well I cooked and you know what. They left all their dishes waiting for me to wash. I could see if the roomie was working and helping with the bills but she isnt. She sat there on the computer, on my dsl while my kids and I cleaned the kitchen. It is time for a written contract of what chores while will have to do. She is here free of charge for us to help her get on her feet not for her to lay around and expect my kids and I to clean up after her. Oh and my kids. They are just as bad. They are 7,8, and 12. We have food that they can easily heat up for lunch when they get hungry. Do they throw their trash awya. No. Dont go on the well you should have taught them because I have. I think she is teaching them that mom has to do everything for them and well I am not that type of mom. My children are self contained. They know how to clean up after themselves. We raised our children to be independent. By no means does this mean I do not take care of them. I still do most of the house hold chores and cooking but we have taught them to help out and now it is like pulling teeth. Maybe I need to just show her the door.Ugh. Sorry for the long vent. I think I am finished now. LOl
4 people like this
9 responses
@royal52gens (5380)
• United States
24 Aug 08
It is good that you have taken the time to "talk" and think this out with us before approaching your roomie. This process will help you to find the right words to use. Perhaps you can part on good company and remain friends. Or maybe you can work things out so everyone carries their fair share of the load. Good luck to you.
1 person likes this
@keasling (724)
• United States
24 Aug 08
Even though I want to I cant throw her out. She is pregnant and i said we would help her. But I am glad I have somewhere I can just mouth off and get things out. It hleps me think of a better solution to the problem.
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10543)
• United States
29 Aug 08
You aren't the first to rant about this kind of thing on mylot and you won't be the last Keasling. Just like I've told others with this type problem, perhaps getting the children more involved in this is needed. In my opinion 7, 8 and 12, you are more than capable of doing chores (at the very least: dishes -_-). Perhaps you should reduce the efforts quite a bit and the message might be received that way. On the other hand, you can talk to your children reasonably about this.
@shana123 (2096)
• India
25 Aug 08
I read in some of your comments and found that she is pregnant, its good for you to cook for a pregnant women and as she is very young she should be carrying her first baby, i said its good for you to cook because these pregnant women doesnt like to have foods ,even if they have they will just vomit it out.. so its very hard for them to cook by their own and eat as they will not feel hungry while they sit to eat soon after cooking by their own, you can just ask her to wash the dishes by herself like you dont wash the dishes when you prepare the food let her ask it from her mouth you tell her that your too tired after preparing the food and ask her to clean the dishes for you, you just still pretend that you not okie and when she does it , assign the job for her itself then it will be her work.. this will help you to maintain a smooth relation and after her pregnancy you can speak out about this .. and you can find a solution to it..
@lrglara (1343)
• Philippines
25 Aug 08
that's totally fine. you can vent here. my mom use to think about that with me sometimes. i can help out, but don't expect me to clean the house... i mean, i really don't clean the house. but i know that when my mom's not around, i can do it. cleaning the house or doing household chores is really not my thing. i'll just work (i have a job) and that's how i help out. i pay the bills!
@succed (879)
• United States
25 Aug 08
been there done that. No more roomie for me. My roomie eat my cooked food, consumed all I've got in the pantry while I was away. Left messy sink full of dirty old dishes. did not help pay bills, did not clean her rooms, she is stink. did not clean the bathroom. Iv'e had it, so I kicked her out! Out the door. I feel like instead of me having a room mate I become a room maid. ah ah! no way. that is why I hate room mate. Plus there is no privacy when u do have a roomie. Bye bye slob roomie out the dooooooooooooooooor!
• United States
25 Aug 08
i dont blame you. the kids are deffinatly old enough to at least heat up lunches by themselves, and pick up after themselves. the rommie is only pregnant that doesnt make her incapable of cooking or taking care oif herself and helping out with chores
@Amberina (1542)
• United States
24 Aug 08
One time when I had to do dishes by hand for 2 years I was going to put a coin operated machine on the dishes cupboard so every time someone wanted to get a clean dish they had to pay for it! LOL. With your friend I can understand why you are helping her but she needs to help out and you will probably have to sit her down and talk politely to her and just tell her your feelings. If she doesn't help out now what is she gonna be like after the baby comes? Good luck.
• United States
24 Aug 08
I understand! I agree with you Your roomie needs to be doing a lot more. She is not contributing to the house at all. Not paying rent, nor helping out a lot to make up for the none payment of rent! Your right she should be setting abter example for the kids also. I would have a talk with her beofre I got so mad to throw her out. ( but what you do is up to you ) Things to look at why did she have tomove in with you in the first place? Why doesn't she pay rent? Why isn't she living with her parents?
• United States
24 Aug 08
I'd stop cooking then. If your roommate wants to eat something, then she can find something to cook. I know that you want your kids to eat, but I'd tell them as long as everyone enjoys sitting around the house doing absolutely nothing, they will not get cooked meals. It sounds harsh but sometimes people need that extra push. If they're not willing to clean up after themselves and help you clean up after meals then you will NOT cook for them. Plain and simple. They may resist for awhile but people will eventually give in especially if they constantly have to eat cold food.