Will you stay in a relationship just because you feel sorry for your partner?

@peach25 (188)
Philippines
August 28, 2008 7:43am CST
I am facing a dilemma right now, because I can't let go of my boyfriend because I know he needs me but, our relationship is not working. We can't see each other, we don't have communication that much. And when I ask him to let me go, he is begging not to leave him. What will I do? He always say he needs me, but I only feel for him is caring as a good friend. And not as much as before, not because I'm fallen for somebody else but, I think I am hurting him more if we will stay in our relationship.
3 responses
@MZKUMA (705)
• United States
28 Aug 08
Needs you for what? You don't see him or talk to him much. What will he be missing? He sounds too needy and staying in a relationship you aren't happy with just because you don't want to hurt him isn't fair. Explain you really hope to remain friends. Staying with him only gives him hope things will work out. You two are thinking on two different pages. Let him man up and deal with his needs...what ever they are. *STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE NEED*
@peach25 (188)
• Philippines
28 Aug 08
Thank you MZKUMA, he always says that if we broke up it is better that we shouldn't see each other anymore. But I still want him to be my friend, besides, we became together before. But I think I'll just respect him and I'll try not to see him after. Thank you again.
@MZKUMA (705)
• United States
28 Aug 08
You offered the friendship. If he declines, maybe it's just until he can get over you. I just don't understand where the bond comes in if you 2 aren't seeing each other or communicate frequently. This is often the demise of a relationship. Unless he is off overseas in the military. Then I understand.
@peach25 (188)
• Philippines
29 Aug 08
Actually he and his family moved and we are both studying so we are quite busy in our studies. But he used to visit me at least twice a month.
@anneshirley (1516)
• Philippines
28 Aug 08
If I am decided that our relationship is not really working then, I will get over it but I will make it a point that we remained friends especially if our break up is just because we outgrow our feelings. If your partner is begging you to stay, analyze your feeling. Do you think there is still hope between you too or he wants to stay with you because he's already used to being with you. You said you don't see often and don't communicate often, I don't see any reason to go on together because the moment you loose to reason to speak to one another that is the reason to part ways.
@peach25 (188)
• Philippines
29 Aug 08
Thanks.. I'll keep that in mind, and I'll try to do that.
@n30wing (4768)
• Philippines
28 Aug 08
Everyone grows up and accepts pain one way or another. I think he will only accept everything when your gone if you really are not happy with the situation. That it is not love anymore,but being a friend to him. All wounds heal in time just a matter of time. Why will you prolong the agony,and for him anyway you will just let it go and he will just get hurt too. Don't yoyu think that is kind a unfair for both of you. Both of you deserve a better someone. I think feeling sorry for your partner is you cheating on him. A real friend even can tells what he/she really feels and thinking off. If you really care for that someone ,you should be open,and being a honest with him/her especially when he or she treat you nicely. It's not being considerate anymore but lying to him. It's just my opinion you take it or you leave it.Good night!