sad,not being able to help people if they asked

United States
September 1, 2008 7:59am CST
A few years age my husband and I had an oh #$%@ fund in the bank of about 7000.00 .We didn't live paycheck by paycheck,we paid the bills as they came in the mail. These days we have to wait to pay our bills when we get paid and hope we have enough for groceries. It's really hard.I quess I feel like a baby because I cry about it.What's our future going to be like? Better yet,what's our childrens future and our grandbabies future's going to be like. When I die someday,will I look day on the earth and everything in it turned good or will I have to suffer for the rest of eternitity watching my family struggle in a world that I was responsible for bringing my kids into? How do you feel our ruture is going to turn out?
7 people like this
12 responses
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
1 Sep 08
you know, it is easy for people to say to you, well get a job, or get a better job, because at the PRESENT things do not look so bleek for them. I too, was able to pay my bills when the came, have money for groceries etc. But today, I am unemployed, due to a lay off and I am scared and cry as well because of my situation. I am collecting unemployment, people say oh, at least you are getting that. That is true and I am grateful, but the amount I am receiving is not near enough to meet my needs. I have never had bill collectors calling me, but at this time, I might as well prepare myself for the coming nightmare. I do not know what the future holds for us, but right it does not look very good. The solution would be for people to get a decent pay in order to keep up with the rising prices of everything. Everything now is so expensive we as average people can not keep up. I am also scared as to what will happen to our children, and future generation. All we can do is hope and pray that something positive will happen, and soon. I pray for you and your family, please pray for me and mine. Take care and may God bless you.
3 people like this
• United States
1 Sep 08
I hate when people say insensitive things like, "well, just get a better job," or "suck it up," and "pull yourself up by the bootstraps." Now, if it were they who were going through what we're going through, it would be all about them - poor pitiful them - and they would be mad at us for our lack of empathy for their financial stress. The truth is, when you aren't given the raise you have been promised for months, and instead, have your hours drastically cut back, it makes life extremely H-A-R-D. Because you're so stressed out over lack of hours, and lack of money, and lack of your ability to pay the bills because of things happening beyond your control, you end up getting sick and missing MORE work. Then you feel like even MORE of a failure and that gives you a violent shove into the downward spiral of depression. Then, of course, when youthink things can't get any worse, something really big and expensive will break and need repair, like a car, sucking away any extra money you may have. I was already having a hard time keeping my head above water. I only make $10/hr. and I was counting on that raise! When I got my hours cut instead, I cried and actually threw things in anger when I got home, and I got absolutely []bno sleep[/b]. My whole goal at the time was trying to get my credit card debt paid off before I graduate college because I knew I'd have bigger fish to fry (tuition payments to worry about) 6 months after I graduated. I didn't need any extra bills compounding the issue. I was almost ready to pay everything off when this happened to me. I had been through being able to save enough to pay off the debt - not once, not twice, but three times - only to have it snatched away due to some other unforseen expensive emergency. I finally was able to get myself out of debt, but it's like it takes forever and people who are living high on the hog just don't get it. I think people like that need a reality check.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Sep 08
I will pray for you also. This world and especially the government doesn't reall understand what is happening in this world. Like you said people are blind. Oh but you have unemployment. Well wupdeeshit!!!Tell the president to try to live your life on your money.That's reality!!!!not living in a plush house with caterers all over asking "would you like anything sir" bull crap!God Bless you too!
@nanayangel (7839)
• Philippines
1 Sep 08
Hi there Free Fogging! I don't think that there's anything babyish about you being worried about your family's and your future. You have every right and reason to worry about it. I do worry about it sometimes, but not too much. I just want to be able to save enough money to provide a stable future for our son. The thing is that everyone will have a different future depending upon their qualities, what they do, and the available opportunities. I hope that you will find something that will make your future more secured. God bless.
• United States
3 Sep 08
I know, I try to be optimistic and think of the good things like my 3 yo granddaughter and one due in April. Such a blessing. I just hope the world is better for them.
• Philippines
23 Apr 09
Thank you very much for choosing my post as the best response.
@Aniakim (351)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
1 Sep 08
That's the same way i feel most of the time now. Things aren't turning out the way i want them to be. Financially, we're struggling. It's better that we still don't have any kids yet. I went into depression, I didn't want to see friends, talk to people, my insecurities ate me. I feel like there's no one i could turn to and that God no longer cares. Eventually, i got used to the hard times, now i just wait when things are gonna be better because i believe it will get better. Though I am struggling in keeping my faith in Him, I still believe that God will eventually hear my prayers and pleas but there are times that I succumb to anger and I question Him for doing this to me and I hope God forgives me for times like that. I'll lend you a piece of encouragement I still have in me. Let's look beyond the mountains, I rainbow lies out there for us. Let's just keep on believing.
• United States
3 Sep 08
I'm still hoping I have a ticket to heaven also. I pray, I cry, I try to limit soending ,but we need to eat and it cost a fortune. Why is everything going up but the wages and look at the teenagers going out into the world for the first time. They can't make it unless they share a place and split the rent with maybe three or four people. It's aweful. And I blame it on Bush.
@laglen (19782)
• United States
1 Sep 08
I know what you mean. I work and work and I still struggle. Then I finally land a decent job making 3 times what I was, then the cost of EVERYTHING went up. Still spinning wheels, still can't save, still feel like Whats the point? But I know I will get through it! Prices are stabilizing a little, gas went down a bit and the bills are caught up now. Hopefully January I will be able to start saving. Things will get better for you too!
• United States
3 Sep 08
Yeah that's what really sucks, I'm make excellent money on my disability because besides SSD,I have my own personal plan. So I make more than when I was working as a nurse. And my husband is a nurse and makes more than I do plus gets a good bonus every month. You know,what the heck is it going to take to live in the work 10 years from now?
@taface412 (3177)
• United States
2 Sep 08
Well I do not have children, but I worry about the future as well. In fact, I hope to have a decent job before I begin having children...if I can have children and that is a whole can of worms there. But I do know the panic of living pay check to pay check. And it was a lifelong thing. My parents were able to raise us on a minimal income. SO it is possible. But after I started working full time and paying off debts only to be replaced by another debt that would take years to pay off, and began to wonder if my whole life was going to be this way. ANd then you have the added pressure of when you go to retire would the social security be there to help meet the costs of living (probably not).... So, do this. Read up on some financial stuff. If you had been able to save once you can do it again. It might be minimal at first but then it will all add up. Some good reads are my personal fav Suze Orman, another one people rave about is Dave Ramsey. After reading Orman's book I upped my 401k to the max amount my employer matched. I though I would feel that 2% more of my income going out of my bi-monthly paycheck, but I didn't. And now I have money socked away into an account I cannot touch (very good for people who cannot save on their own). In fact, this has encouraged me to get on the ball with things. On Orman's web site you can fill out a personal action plan questionaire and they provide you with a list of actions to do according to the needs and wants you have for your own life. And you do not have to buy the book to get the personal code for this, I just got them out of library books or books I borrowed from others at work. So don't feel like you are a cry baby. Real life hit you, probably hard. And it is okay to cry. I do sometimes....it helps let off the pressure. And you can look at it this way in regards to your kids. If you learn how to be more financial savvy than it is all the better for your kids...after all leading by example it may teach them the importance of respecting the money you earn.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Sep 08
We have had a 401 K since we were 17 yo ,now 42. and we have 3CD's and another 401K. So we will be all right when we retire,but I really would like to keep our good credit until then and we are on the edge of losing it. I'm learning to be frugal but it's not easy when you haven't had to do it before. Right now I just hope we servive through this. I know there are a lot of people in worse shape and I pray for them everyday. It's really too bad our government can fork out billions for a war that never should have happened,then fork out more to help them rebuild their country. But the can't help their own people who every day are losing their houses and jobs.
• United States
1 Sep 08
Well, I feel that God has a plan for everyone and everything we do is part of the plan. Sometimes when we are struggling, we cannot see what good will come out of it. Or what purpose it has but to cause us pain. But if you wait things out. There is always a change that is good and that is part of God's plans for us! Even suffering has a huge part. It helps us to relate to others that are going through what we already went through. And we are able to give them good advice from what we went through!
• United States
1 Sep 08
Well, God taught me never to get into any credit card debt again. From now on, if I can't pay cash for it, I don't need it. (Now, mind you, I never spent frivolously on my cards - that debt was racked up due to hospital visits because I had no health insurance because I can't afford it, and car break downs, etc.) But still. If I have to go to the hospital again, they'll just have to work with me on payments. It's the best I can do.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
2 Sep 08
What you are feeling is really very normal. Most of us, I think are worried about the future and that of our children. I have always struggled to get by so i'm pretty used to it but sometimes still, i get so worried that I feel sick. I think that you just are not used to feeling this way so maybe it feels worse to you. When I catch myself getting all worried and stressed, I usually do something to distract myself....go for a walk, read, visit a friend...anything. worrying does no good and makes you feel horrible. I'm pretty poor but i've been much poorer financially. We've always managed. It always works out one way or another. I don't want to spend my time here being miserable over things that I can't change and I find that when I get negative...things just go from bad to worse. Try to think positive. It'll all work out, i'm sure.
1 person likes this
• Australia
2 Sep 08
Yes, its quite saddening as to how the world is turning these days. Its not just in one or two places but it seems everywhere...even from "developed" countries. Unfortunately, the whole world cannot be ruled just by one person or being...and even if it can be, not everybody will follow suit anyway. Differences, personal and social are some of the contributing factors, I would say. We can only control what's going on within our family circle, so maybe its better to just focus our attention there. This is why children's upbringing are so important because this is how they'll learn how to cope with the always changing courses in their lives. For as long as you're able to get them ready and settled when they reach the ripe age to leave home, you've done your part and all you can do is just sit back and relax...and let them take on and continue with life's battle. If they have the right foundation, nothing will and can ever destroy them.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12845)
• Australia
1 Sep 08
well, i had been thinking of the same thing as well lately... but again, i learn to trust God and put my faith in Him... He promises that He won't let His children go hungry or begging for bread... He is a sufficient God and He will provide His children with what they needed accordingly... i had learnt that worrying too much didn't help to make the situation better at all... it is better to put our lives in His hands and let Him guide our lives... things will work out for the best of us at His will... not our will... good luck... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Sep 08
Well the cost of everything has gone up and is reasonable to feel stressed because of how everything is going, I can say that times have been tough for me too but after everything I am not willing to give up because I have my daughter to provide for. I say you are an outstanding mother because not many people will worry a great deal over this subject even though it is reality. I just believe that everyone has their ups and downs in life but one gets through them the best way one could and effort is what counts. In situations like this one needs to see where some costs can be cut down, buy store brands, and put necessities before desires. Well I wish you the best and hope everything gets better for you and your family.
@sharra1 (6342)
• Australia
2 Sep 08
I know how you feel. I used to have a $20000 in the bank and a good paying job and never had to worry about debts. The credit card was always paid in full and then I got sick and could not work any more and for a while our debts climbed and I was so stressed that we were going backwards. It is really terrifying when this happens and I still get stressed about it but I am lucky to have a partner who just copes and he always helps me through the bad times. We have our debts under control again and while we still struggle with the grocery bills every week we are just coming in under our income. I do not know how the future will turn out but I do believe that people's attitudes have to change or we are headed for disaster. I do not know if it ill be a climate change disaster or a war but something will happen. People cannot go on working 2 jobs and still being in danger of starving when there are a few with so much wealth. I see companies making more profit than ever and sacking staff to keep shareholders happy. They do not care that those people will not be able to feed their children, all they care about is making more and more money. It is just totally wrong. I think it will only get worse until the whole thing comes crashing down. You cannot keep expanding markets and making more profits in a finite world market. Such greed is simply wrong and it is causing so much pain and suffering.
@nengs10 (3188)
• Philippines
2 Sep 08
Life is becoming harder and more challenging in a way nowadays. As the world economy continues to alleviate,we are even more affected by it's status now. We should then fight that problem ourselves. We need to earn more and be more diligent with our work.