money!

@android (895)
September 10, 2008 4:59pm CST
My partner gets money for herself and children from the government and has her rent paid for her. do you think that it's fair for her to demand money from me if I move in with her, even though I would be providing servicing and maintenance in the house, a car with insurance and tax, computers for us all to use, etc??
1 person likes this
5 responses
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
10 Sep 08
Since she does not pay any out of pocket for rent, I am guessing that she also receives food help as well. Wow, what a lucky lady, she has everything paid for her. If I were her, no, I would not expect you to pay for anything that I am receiving for free. Whether you were there or not, her situation will be the same. I do not think she should demand any money from you. If you feel you would like to get extras for the house that she does not have, that would be nice. But as far as paying for her rent and like I said anything she is getting free, no you should not.
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@android (895)
10 Sep 08
Agreed! I am renting my own flat because of this problem and all her friends and family agree with me on this too! However, when I come to her house every day, she says you come here, eat my food and use my electric but don't give me any money. However, if I give her money then our family, including our children, are left without a car to be able to travel and are not able to afford to take holidays or go for days out because of it! What can I do to make her see?
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
10 Sep 08
Your girlfriend is being very selfish, I am surprised you are even dealing with her. A relationship means that I help you, you help me. What do we have to offer each other to make our lives better. She is getting free housing, that is all she has to offer to you, you have transportation, and the means to bring fun and entertainment into her life. She has to compromise with you before she loses you. It is not always about ourselves, when we are in a relationsip it then becomes all about US. She needs to reevaluate her decision and come up with a compromise, which does not include you paying her for something she is getting free.
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@android (895)
10 Sep 08
I absolutely agree! The way she sees it is that if I'm living in her house, then I'm using her gas and electric and eating the food which she pays for. However, the government give her the money to buy all that with! Of course, I am willing to pay for my own food and I have my own accommodation if that's what it will take, but she just doesn't seem to see it that way. I have left her recently because of it and we are trying to sort things out, but she is starting to hint on all this once again.
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
11 Sep 08
maybe it is OK, how about the food that you are going to eat? or maybe pay a rent to her
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@android (895)
11 Sep 08
She has pretty much everything paid for by the government for her. I can have my own accommodation and buy my own food and pay my own bills on my own for less than the amount of money that she demands. But if I'm going to contribute a car and computers to the family then why shouldn't I be demanding money from her towards it??!!
@rsa101 (13336)
• Philippines
11 Sep 08
Well I think that will depend on how things will go after you live in with her. I think you two should talk about it and arrange things so that everything will be cleared for her. My question is will the government take back their support once they see that she has a man that could support her and its time they stop the support? It will totally depend on how you and her agree on things that relate to money.
@android (895)
11 Sep 08
It depends whether I am claiming benefits or working at the time.
• United States
11 Sep 08
Depending on the state you live in and depending on how that state works but i know here if your on "housing" and your not on the paper when she signed up for this then they will take her off housing and make her pay her for the rent and everything else they are paying for if they do find out someone else is living there. But as far as "demanding" money for you heck no i wouldnt give it to her and i dang sure would let her know that it aint going to happen. Sounds to me like she jsut wants ya money not you. Sounds mean i know but hey the truth is the truth.
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@android (895)
11 Sep 08
Some good points, though when I was living with her they would pay the rent for both of us and give us a certain amount of money for us both to live on, which we are each entitled to by law 50% each, yet because I was there she would demand some of that money. It certainly does seem like she just wants the money but I've made my mind up now anyway, she ain't getting it and if I have to stay in my own accommodation because of that then that's what I'll do.
@cream97 (29169)
• United States
10 Sep 08
No, not unless you help her with her utilities??? Or maybe is she under Housing Authority? I know that they send you an utility bill a month.. They cover these bills mostly..
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@android (895)
10 Sep 08
The way I see it is that if I'm giving her money to stay in her house (which is paid for by the government), then that leaves me in a position whereby I cannot provide a car, i cannot contribute to the house, I cannot provide computers and internet and I cannot put money towards holidays. Yet she still demands that I should be giving her most of my money for living in her house and eating her food, even though I sometimes put money towards the bills anyway (gas, electric).