The Circle Is Broken..........*sigh*

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For over a month now I've been dealing with the fallout of a mylot drama that never should have happened. A little patience, a little 'going to the source' instead of the rumor mongers and conspiracy theorists, and so much heartache for a number of people could have been avoided. I've dealt with trolls - to use a myot vocab word, before. They don't scare me. Frankly, they often amuse me in their pettiness and lack of ability to rise above their obvious need to flex their cyber muscles and their resulting whining discussions about being maltreated. (AND NO! THIS IS NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE IN PARTICULAR! IS THAT CLEAR?) For eight months an ever growing circle of friends here, posted, laughed, cried, cared and shared. Everyone was made welcome and everyone brought to the circle their own perspective and unique self expression, and contributed to the ups and downs and ebb and flow of mylot. Friends supported each other through attacks and rising and fallings stars and other concerns; through personal problems, online problems and whatever else touched their lives, and this circle of friends enjoyed each other's company and took comfort there. Well the circle is broken. Friends have been lost, users have left the site and new circles have been formed. Life goes on eh? Of course it does. But at what cost? This is not a site where real identities, the ins and outs of daily lives and the minutiae of our existences is supposed to be recorded. Not everyone has the same level of comprehension of the written word whether it be because they are not great readers (books, etc.) or because of language difficulties. That is a given on any international site. But regardless of skill level, we all have our own way of expressing ourselves. The only point of contention should be, that that self expression be respectful of others. People come and go here all the time for various reasons. People have user names for a reason. What their history is, what their agenda for being here is, is NO ONE'S business but the poster's themselve's and their choices and privacy should be respected. To make untrue, unfair and unceasing allegations against someone based on rumor, false information or speculation is not only wrong, it's harmful to more than the person being targeted. So many good users have now left the site, hurt, angry or just plain disillusioned. And why is that? Anyone who has been here for any length of time can answer that question. It's because of those who choose deliberately to 'speak their mind' against those they find wanting (for whatever reason) with no care or concern for the 'whole' person; they are simply speaking against ONE dimension of that person and feel quite justified in their right to do so. Or they work behind the scenes so to speak, to make that 'one dimension' the sum total of a person, in the mind of others. How cruel that is. We only have to look to ourselves to realize that if someone we cared about, 'wrote us off as a good person', because of a fault perceived by SOMEONE else, how much that would hurt us. And yet for centuries, humans have fed the gossip mill, closed their minds and hearts and even when the truth would set them free, refused to even entertain it or if they finally did, often claimed 'too little, too late', which in a lot cases might be true but not in EVERY case. People are going to 'read' into whatever they 'read', whatever they want. That's also a given. Perception, interpretation and understanding are really very subjective activities. But as supposedly mature adults, do we not owe it to ourselves and others to at least reserve judgment until we have ALL the facts? Or on a forum like mylot, do we not owe it to the value of the site, to diffuse the drama rather than perpetuate it? Or is the only way to avoid furthering dramatic 'behaviour', to be found by abandoning the site altogether? Sadly, abandonment seems to be the order of the day ------ or the threat of it at least. LOL JMO (just my opinion) - and in the words of sooooooooooo many people here: I'm entitled to express it. (It will be interesting to see how long that 'entitlement' lasts! LOL) What's your opinion on the internet as a new universe of gossip? Do you use it as your playground to build and tear down, or do you even care about the impact the you have on the people you 'meet'? Do you find the written word so 'personal' that your own perceptions of it becomes your only truth, or do you allow for the fact that some people just know how to write and perhaps you may be missing the entire point of things, not so much of what is 'said', but how? Are you careful how you write things? If not, why not?