Get Over It!

@jbl1975 (374)
United States
September 20, 2008 5:04pm CST
This isn't directed at any of you, but why do people have the unmitigated nerve to say this to people having problems that are affecting their life? First off, most people can't control whatever it is that is making them miserable. If we ALL could just "get over it", wouldn't we have all DONE THAT by now?! There wouldn't be the need for therapists, phychologists, psychiatrists, psychoanalysts, drugs, mental homes, mental hospitals, etc. now wouldn't there?! If you're one of those who somehow thinks everything is so damn easy that all we need to do is "GET OVER IT", think before you even talk, alright?! Not everybody is like YOU!
3 people like this
18 responses
• United States
21 Sep 08
Nicely put!!! I also hate the my problem is worse then yours so why are you complaining. Well what ever is wrong with someone else is just as important to them as whatever is wrong with you is to you.
1 person likes this
@jbl1975 (374)
• United States
21 Sep 08
Personally I don't need to have anyone tell me whether or not their lives were better or worse then mine. Hell, I have a friend who is married to an extremely jealous woman (who isn't a whole hellova lot to look at BTW), and has two kids...BOTH with autism, and he reminds me that he's married and I have nobody. I've told him that between him, another friend of ours who went through a nightmare marriage, and another one who, before meeting his soon-to-be wife, went through a relationship any one of us would've dropped out of LONG before he did, I don't even care if I ever get married. I'm probably better off.
• United States
21 Sep 08
lol, well maybe someday you will find the right one. Always keep a open mind and heart.
• Canada
21 Sep 08
Well said !! It doesn't help when you go looking for help and you are told that it is time to get over whatever is bothering you . If they know how you can get over something they then they need to tell us how to go about doing this because when someone tells me that I need to get over something that is the first thing I always ask them , is ok well tell me how to get over this because I don't know how to do it on my own . Of course they never have an answer when you ask them how you are supposed to do this . Those that tell someone to get over something do not have empathy for others because when they are upset about something they expect you to listen to there problems . Those that say this are not very good friends and not people I care to associate with . It doesn't make sence , you go out and someone will ask you what is wrong and you will tell them and they will tell you to get over it . Well if they didn't want to know what was wrong then why did they ask in the firt place !!
1 person likes this
@jbl1975 (374)
• United States
21 Sep 08
I'm occasionally the C in an A-B conversation when someone is having problems. Maybe because I want to hear it to sympathize with them or to possibly help, but never to ridicule them. I just recently had a coworker who was upset because, I found out, she failed the test that would've gotten her her HS diploma. I asked something about if she'll get another chance to take it before graduation? She then told me she had already graduated and was heading for college. The test was just for the actual diploma. While it was going through my head that, "Why would you be that upset if you've already graduated?", it also went through my head that "she might still want the certificate to prove it." I dunno, but I did tell her sympathetically she shouldn't worry too much about it, because hell I misplaced my diploma merely a few years after HS. How she takes it is on her, and I would never expect her to take my advice if it didn't work for her. After all, during a talk at a broadcasting school with someone (which I mentioned in a previous response over having a girlfriend), I was upset that I failed a test I know I would've passed with flying colors had a remembered to study the other night (long story why), and now I was going to have to retake the test and get nothing higher then a C. The guy told me that potential employers will never know my grades here, as they don't officially matter in that case, but I always felt that "I'LL know!" and maybe that's what mattered inside. Just like my coworker, she may have graduated, she may go onto college and graduate from there, but she'll still never have the certificate, and that may feel bad to her.
1 person likes this
@LadyMarissa (12165)
• United States
20 Sep 08
Some people cannot understand what they have NEVER experienced!!! I suffer from depression most of the time. My bosses wife asked me how I was doing one day. I responded that I was depressed. She looked at me & said "What the hell you got to be depressed about?" Anyone who has suffered from depression knows that it nothing that you can explain. It just kinda sneaks up on you & bites you on the butt!!! I used to get upset with them until I realized that they are just ignorant of the facts.
@sudalunts (5527)
• United States
20 Sep 08
I know exactly where you are coming from. Some people think just because things are okay for them they should be for everyone else. Another thing I hate to hear someone say to a person who is having financial difficulties is "GET A JOB", like all you need to do is leave your house and a job is there waiting for you. It is easy to say "GET OVER IT" when you do not have the same concerns day after day. These people need to have a reality check. That is why sometimes it is not wise to let everyone know what you are going through, because most people if they haven't experienced it or are not currently going through it, they think that it can be simply fixed.
1 person likes this
@jbl1975 (374)
• United States
20 Sep 08
Shall we turn this into the "state the obvious" thread? LOL I donated plasma at one place where they didn't put an ACE bandage or gauze around your elbow, and expected you to just hold it down until god-knows-when. Well, I had donated so much in one arm, the skin wasn't healing as fast as it used to, and it took a good half-an-hour for it to stop so I could put a bandage on it, get paid, and leave. All this time, the morons there kept constantly saying the same things; "APPLY PRESSURE, HOLD YOUR ARM UP, ETC." Things I had been doing the WHOLE TIME, THANK YOU! I eventually quit going there.
1 person likes this
@philjas (1134)
• United States
20 Sep 08
The other one I hate is "quit feeling sorry for yourself." There are times when I think everyone has a perfect right to feel sorry for themself.
1 person likes this
@jbl1975 (374)
• United States
20 Sep 08
Well, "quit feeling sorry for yourself" isn't quite as bad. Yes we all have felt sorry for ourselves from time to time, but the important thing is being able to pick yourself up and continue. As for "Get Over It", many of us (myself included) can get through the day with whatever is bugging us that makes a jerk like that say that. We may know what's wrong, but we might know where to turn to fix it. We try to fix it, but it may involve taking pills for the rest of your life, or until the pills no longer have any effect.
• United States
20 Sep 08
i know what you mean. i have suffered from depression for some time now- it is a family thing that both my mother and grandfather suffered from. luckily i have never had anyone tell me to "get over it." i don't know what i would do if someone did say that to me. i would definitely be very upset to say the least. people really do need to think before they speak, and know something about what they are talking about before they say anything. like those people that say post-partum depression is not really a real illness or is all in a person's head. i have suffered from it and i know that is not the case. i hate people who think just because their life is so hunky dory that everyone else's should be, too, and that if you are not smiling and happy all the time there is something wrong with you.
1 person likes this
@barehugs (8992)
• Canada
21 Sep 08
I'm a Healthy Senior who has never been depressed.I have friends who suffer from depression and I feel for them. However, everyone has problems that affect their lives. Some people seem to savor their problems, and cultivate them. Others just move on, and the problems go away. To those who love to discuss their problems I say," Get over it! I for one don't want to hear about it." "Problems are opportunities dressed in work clothes!"
@jbl1975 (374)
• United States
21 Sep 08
Well people obviously will not target you as one to talk to if they need someone to talk to. I won't. Believe me, the guy I had mentioned who last told me to "get over it" is literally the LAST person I will EVER talk to if I need to feel better or want to get something off my chest.
1 person likes this
@teka44 (3425)
• Brazil
20 Sep 08
Hi jbl. I agree with you. The true is that who say it is the kind of people that don't care about the others or about the problems of others. Is easy, much easy to say "get over it" or "it is nothing, forget it". But the funny thing is that these persons when having some problem make it the focal point of the world. What happen with them is always important but what happen with others is always insignificant, trinial and easy to "get over it". Well, people are funny some times . Get over it and have a nice weekend.
@besthope44 (12145)
• India
8 Oct 10
Most time, its my work..with ontime deliveries and work loads. I try to divert mind on music and i feel better.
@katkat (2379)
• Philippines
7 Oct 08
For people that don’t feels what you feel could easily say get over it. It may sound easy to say but hard to do. Most people say this is not really cares to the person and saying things like this would not help. I think people who don’t have to say better to keep quiet and not say things like get over it. Sometimes people only feel more miserable. Encouraging words are more acceptable and can help a lot if you really mean it to say.
@mflower2053 (3227)
• United States
22 Sep 08
I said this about someone a couple of weeks ago. I think sometimes it needs to be said. we all know its hard to get over someone who has passed away and no I'm not saying get over that but that someone leaves a spouse behind. Which in this case is my grandfather. He became very depressed and was on medication and thought for sure we would lose him b/c he was getting really bad. Didn't want to be with the family was becoming more and more distant. Then he found a girlfriend and is more active, comes with the family more places and is very happy compared to how he was last year. Well my Aunt who is 44 and has a family of her own is upset and always passing comments about how its wrong for him to be so happy right now when his wife is gone. ??? For that I dont' care get over it or keep your comments to yourself. Be happy we have him and he is doing alot better now.
• United States
22 Sep 08
I completely understand. I used to hate when my husband would come home from work complaining about all the things I hadnt done. I didn't want to get out of bed much less anything else. So him coming home and complaining would just make it worse. "Just get over it and do what you need to do!" Well the fact was he didn't understand what was going on, so how could he say that. After numerous anti-depressants and finally adding a mood stabilizer to the mix, we finally figured it out. I was catogorized as having depression but didn't respond to antidepressants. So adding the mood stablizer helped. I have been off the meds for 2 yrs and doing good. The change in location (Oregon to Florida) seemed to help also.
@snowy22315 (36144)
• United States
22 Sep 08
Everybody gets over things at their own pace. I dont think people can get over things at will. Some people though do sometimes have an unfortunate tendency to dwell on problems and think themselves sick however. I believe that people who say things like get over i doent have much insight.
• United States
21 Sep 08
I have generally found that the people that yell "Get over it", are usually the ones that whine the loudest when something happens to them. They can't have compassion for anyone else but definitely expect it when they are involved. When someone is having trouble, how hard is it to sympathize with them and offer up a prayer for them. A lot of time, that is all it takes to get them to feeling better about themselves so they can go on.
• United States
21 Sep 08
Im Bipolar and before I was able to actually figure out the problem (yea, I had to figure it out) I had so much of this from my boyfriend because I had these mood swings that never went away, they would last for weeks at a time where I would be on top of the world and then for a week down in the dirt and unable to function--NOT a nice way to live. And the hardest thing is KNOWING something was not right but not being able to put my finger on it, this was all before I had kids and I didnt find out until having my second child, by that time I was 26. Its hard when you just want EVERYTHING to be normal and people tell you to just get over it or stop moping around and I sympathize with it but I can say that I have felt the same way about someone else so I guess this can go both ways. I had a girl I worked with and she was a victim of her boyfriend who abused her and it was like she could not even think for herself. It was soo hard for me to understand because I came from a abusive background growing up and I would never put myself back in that situation but she did not want to leave, she stayed with me for a couple days and went right back--obviously she was scared, so I cannot speak for anyone because she may have felt entirely different than I.
@NrgDfenZ (1810)
• Belgium
21 Sep 08
Well some people need to talk to get over their problems, or to deal with it.. And when someone then says to deal with it, is just stupid.. I mean if it was so easy, they would've already done it :D Have a nice day..
@cutepenguin (6458)
• Canada
21 Sep 08
I think people who haven't really had any major problems think that other people's problems are easy to deal with. It's easy to minimize situations and problems when they are happening to someone else. And some people are too lazy to try to understand, so they just say dumb things.
• Malaysia
21 Sep 08
Hurmm.. I get it all the time. I hate it when people say to me, ' owhh just get over it' or 'owhh come on, it's really not that hard'. I guess that is why there are professional counsilors and a study on psychiatry and psychology. In my case, I try to explain to them that what is easy for them is hard for me. Then I listen to what they say.