Do you always get what you want? or you get it by reasoning out?

@pehpot (4762)
Philippines
September 29, 2008 7:03pm CST
When I gave birth to my youngest boy and my sister left and I was left with taking care of the kids alone, I learned a lot. I learned that sometimes you need to sound pitiful to get what you want. Like there was a time when we want delivered foods, my hubby was the first one to call and the delivery said our place was too far, and that they would have to ask for a higher minimum order. I tired calling them and this time I put on a pitiful voice and they agreed to deliver on our place. There was also a time when I needed some paper works and when I call the office of our Baranggay, I put on again a very pitiful voice, and so the worker assisted me in every possible way. har har. But sometimes when you are dealing with professional people. like bank clerks, sales representative, you have to put on a knowing voice, a confident voice. The tendency is this people tend to discriminate you when they feel you are not confident to deal with them and so the only way to talk to them is let them know you are educated too. There was a time when we were doing our grocery and I accidentally crashed a bottle of medicine. it was my fault but my hubby have it the other way around. He says that it was the fault of the manufacturer because they out on a weak packaging and so on and so on, then they did not charge us. There was also time when we forgot to pay our connection bills and it was cut off, and when we pay it, they say that it would be on again in 24 hours (the clerk who said it did not know that we still have a pending unpaid bill and in that case we still need to settle it before we can have our connection) and so when the connection was still not on after 24 hours, my hubby called them and debate over what the clerk had advised him. I was amazed sometimes how my hubby can get what he wants by reasoning out How about you? you always get what you want when you reason out?
2 people like this
17 responses
@salonga (27957)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
Knowing the techniques of how to deal with different kinds of people has magic. You are right in what you said. It depends on who you are talking with. You have to adjust yourself on what kind of people you are talking. I agree with you one hundred percent. There are times when you have to request, there are times when you have to sound intellectual, there are times when you have to sound authoritative, there are times when you have to sound so demanding because you deserve it. Different people, different circumstances call for different kinds of approaches in order to get what you want. I sort of can identify with you. I also do the same.
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
oh you put it so well mom, yeah different people different attitude and it works all the time
@Sheepie (3118)
• United States
30 Sep 08
What a great hubby you have! Hopefully I'll get one like that someday. When I try to get what I want, normally in my case it is from my parents, I debate and give them good reasons and don't back down. I don't get mad, but I act as though my opinion is right and I use a lot of big words to make myself seem really smart. Eventually they might let me do what I want because I seem to be making a good arguement, even if I know myself I am not.
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
reasoning out sure can get you places.
@sati123 (184)
9 Oct 08
That was a pretty good observation, that there are some people that base their judgment on feelings and there are some that are more objective than others. You are lucky that your other half can get away with things by reasoning out, like the movie Godfather. LOL I think I will be more cautious on dealing with people now. I will observe them more and see for myself your theory, but I think you are right. I may practice that too, pitiful voice LOL, teach me how to do it. LOL
@iyah10 (4116)
• Kuwait
4 Oct 08
No, I won't at least I have to learn from your hubby's way but here in Kuwait they will entertained more if you are a foreigner so if there is something I would like to compromised off then I would just talked to my wife to give them a call then for sure it will helped a lot but not for me as a Local Nationality I do wonder why also for i cannot blamed them for they will always encountered most of them with a very demanding voice that for sure would irritated them....
@annjilena (5620)
• United States
30 Sep 08
iam a very independent person so i don,t look for pity from anyone i suppose i could but i havent, but i have learned this it,s a time to speak and a time to be quite you can talk yourself ,out of good thing happening to you. there are a lot of good people out there and are fair i look for honest people if i know i did wrong i will step up and if they are wrong i hope they step up to the plate and fix the problems as you mention in some of your quest here.
@stephcjh (32327)
• United States
30 Sep 08
I get what I want sometimes. It all depends on what it is and if I really need it or have to have it. I use alot of reasoning when it comes to deciding whether or not to have something for myself or not.
• United States
30 Sep 08
hi when i was a child i use to get every thing from my father without giving any reasons from my side,but now i'm married and came out from my fathers affection and now i stay with my husband who was also so sweet like my father.He gets me everything with out giving him any reason.........he never says no what ever i ask.
@carmela0210 (1591)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
it really depends on our tone of our voice and how we deliver it i think, sometimes you just have to pretend to be angry for youre children to obey what you have just said, and always stick on what have you been said earlier for you get what you wanted. It happens to me already, im managing a small business, and early january we are obliged to get business permits and payments for different things, for us to have permit, but when i was ready to pay it the clerk said that my papers is not their and they said its gone, so i make another application and they say they would sent an inspection team again to my store, because im really busy with other things and also at the office i didnt notice that we have already this closure order and they really close my shop,lol. But i imediately go to the mayor's office and told him that it was not my fault, it was the clerk's fault because of their neglegence the lost our application form and they want me to pay now the penalty, but i stick on telling that its not my fault, and afterwards the mayor ask the clerk to come to his office and told the clerk to get the closure order in my shop,lucky for me,lol.
@savypat (20246)
• United States
30 Sep 08
I don't like to manage people like that, I don't like to be managed and I believe in do on toothers as you would have them do unto you.
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
i get what i want but in a right way. when it's my fault i admit it because i don't want to let the others get the blame. i reason out when i know i'm right and i think it really helps because people will believe you when they see that you're sure of what you're saying.
• India
30 Sep 08
You sure sound like a smart person!! Well, I still haven't learned how to get things out of people. I just learned how to manage without the things that other people provide. I really wish I could learn your techniques. But I guess it is too late to learn? ;) Cheers and happy mylotting
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
30 Sep 08
YEah, when facing with different ple, we need to use different kinds of tones in odrer to get what we want.. hehe =D Just like your case, food delivery, u can act pitiful or u can be demanding too.. lol =D Demanding in a way that they are scare of u and that u appear to have every right to ahve the food being delivered to u at the same price.. lol =D THat's what my fren always do.. hehe As for bank, there's really only one way, which is to be confident ^_^ BEcause they tend to look down on ple, so the best way is to proud and arrogant while talking to them.. lol =D I guess your hubby is good, and that he has his own way with things, and he's pretty smart too ^_^ I dun usually get the things i want thru reasoning, because singaporeans dun like to listen to reasons.. They only think that they are always right.. haha
• United States
30 Sep 08
I usually find a way to get what I want without breaking the law and without scamming anyone.
@kissie34 (2296)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
well, not all the time I get what I want.. Sometimes no matter what will I do i just can get what I want... When everytime I want something I will asked it to my parents, same as you I will make a pity voice then that's the time I will speak for reasons why should I get those things.. Sometimes, it is effective but sometimes don't.. I don't make so much arguments when my father said no already because I know no matter what will I say he stand on his answer... So, I will just follow and respect what he wants..
@modstar (9612)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
I don't get what i want especially from my parents. No amount of reasoning can convinced them to give in to what i want. It sucks!
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
30 Sep 08
i wish i can get all i want.... but sometimes we realy have to ask properly and ask it in a very nice way. not everything can be resolve in making your way or argueing. i once or twice (or more lol) ask something through ddemanding but not at all times. sometimes there are situations that we need to ask nicely. i can also get what i want by reasoning out but sometimes even you reason out you cant get your way all the time.
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
30 Sep 08
it's good to get what you want. i sure do try to.lol i don't think i'm very good at reasoning tho, too much temper.lol