My niece is in jail

United States
October 7, 2008 6:33pm CST
We just got a call that my niece is in jail for bench warrents for outstanding tickets and she and her new loser boyfriend/dealer stole a truck and got arrested. She is sitting in jail and no one will bail her out. I wouldn't even if I had it to do. She has been on heavy drugs since she was 16 she is now 23. She has two kids that she obviously doesn't love. The kids are 3 1/2 and less than 1 year old. They are always filthy. My ex sister in law has the kids right now but who knows what is going to happen to them now. My niece has thrown her life away. She will now be a convicted fellon and have no future at all. I am heartbroken but what can I do....nothing. I have begged and pleaded with her to change her life. Sh cares about nothing and no one just about getting high. Thanks for listening to me mylot friends.
5 people like this
19 responses
@nicholejade (2430)
• Canada
8 Oct 08
Honestly what can you do nothing. You are absoultuely right. What more are you suppose to do. She is an adult and has to take responsiblity for her actions. You have tried to help and she won't take it. So I say let her stay in jail until she gets it. That means her parents and the rest of the family should let her stay in there as well. Maybe if she gets a dose of jail life she will shape up and not want to go back. I really feel for those kids. If she doens't love them or care for them why have them. I honestly hate mothers that do this. I'm sorry to hear this happened.
@misskit (289)
• United States
7 Oct 08
All you can do is pray that she will learn her lesson and learn it soon. There comes a time when you just have to use tough love because nothing else is working. It looks like this time she will just have to sit on her own blisters and and take her medicine on this one. Its not easy, not easy at all, to just sit and do nothing, but when they won't listen and everyone has tried everything, then it is time for them to learn a hard lesson in life. I feel sorry for her kids, its always the kids that suffer and I hope that the courts will let them live with relatives who want them and will love them and care for them. You are doing the right thing in my opinion, bailing her out will not help, talking yourself blue in the face is not helping, so now just let her take her punishment and hope and pray that she will turn herself around soon.
2 people like this
@sudalunts (5527)
• United States
8 Oct 08
Well, now she has the time to reflect on how she did not listen to people's good advice, and the wrong choices she has made. It is too bad that some people have to hit the bottom before realizing what they were doing is wrong. I am concerned about the children, they are so young not to have their mother around, but I guess when she was around she really wasn't. The auto thief charge is a serious one, hopefully this is her first offense and she will only get probation. Wishing your family luck
1 person likes this
@jammyt (2824)
• Philippines
7 Oct 08
Awwww, how sad. i guess it is one of those classic case of going and following the wrong direction in life. Maybe she was influenced heavily by friends.. or so-called friends? I pity her kids actually. So innocent. Who will take care of them while this is all happening to their mom? I hope they will turn out like her, instead strive to be what their mother was not. Hugs to you and I hope everything will turn out well.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Oct 08
My brother says that he and his ex wife are going to petition for joint custody but my brother was supposed to move here to Florida next year and if they share custody he won't be able to move here.
@belk89 (1104)
• Philippines
8 Oct 08
I am sorry to hear that your niece is in trouble. I know you wanted to help her out but i think she is at the right age to know what is right and wrong. She obviously made the wrong decision in life. I feel bad for her kids too, she should take care of them. I wish soon she will realized everything that she did wrong and so she can find a good job and raised her kids well. I believe that everyone deserved a chance to change. Prayers can move mountain, just continue praying for her children and for her as well. So one day she will finally make a change for herself and for her children.
1 person likes this
@albino001 (154)
• India
8 Oct 08
its sad that ur niece was in jail .. try to change her
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Oct 08
I am so sorry to hear about this. Your niece has definitely gone down the wrong path and made bad choices. Hopefully there is someone that can care for the children and give them a chance at a normal, healthy life. The only thing you can do is hope and pray that jail will turn your niece around. I know people that have been completely turned around after spending some time in jail. But, if she doesn't, there is not a whole lot that you can do. A person has to want to change. No one can force them to change. Just hope for the best.
1 person likes this
@Ithink (5904)
• United States
8 Oct 08
Im sorry you are going thru this. I know it is hard and I can say that as my daughter sounds like your niece. The only difference is that she is in lock-up and will be turning 18 and does the same thing. She is always in trouble and thinks that she knows all. You can talk blue in the face and it changes nothing in the way she acts. This is the 3rd placement for her as noone can figure out what to do with her. It is hard but we had to tell them no we wont have her back in our home. SOunds harsh but we have 5 other kids in the house to think about. I understand the child thing too as we are now raising her daughter. They dont seem to care about anyone but themselves not even their babies, which makes me feel sad and mad. I have to say we have finally gotten over the what did we do wrong raising her. After a certain age it is in their hands and unlike those that say you rule until they are 18, if only that was so.
1 person likes this
@cutepenguin (6458)
• Canada
8 Oct 08
I'm sorry to hear about this. Some people only learn the hard way - maybe this will give your niece a chance to think about the choices she ahs made and maybe come up with a plan.
1 person likes this
• India
8 Oct 08
I am sorry to hear it but she had it coming. I wonder where the parents went wrong in bringing her up. Such people who do not care to shoulder responsibility, should not produce children. The poor kids will have a tough time at that tender age when they should be nurtured by a mother. Hve no pity for her but sad for teh children.
1 person likes this
@jimyltm (11)
• China
8 Oct 08
Every time I saw the news like this I feeling deeply sorry,Why the world fulling of war,fulling of evil,fulling of moral losed. May God bless the pitiful child.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Oct 08
i am so sorry to hear that, if this is her first offense they will relase her not quickly, but she will get released, she shud ask for some type of rehab help, i know that my never happen but mybe a day in jail will wake her up.
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12852)
• Australia
8 Oct 08
i'm so sorry to hear about the news... but your niece is already an adult and she has to learn to be responsible for her actions... if she had to experience staying in jail because of her actions, then so be it... i agree with you not to bail her as she has to learn her lesson... hopefully she will learn from this experience and change her lifestyle after she comes out from the jail... take care and have a nice day...
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Oct 08
Sometimes things happen for reasons , this can be a good learning experience for her or the worst experience of her life in the long run she will determine whether things will change and if so for the better or the worse. My thoughts and prayers will be with you, her and the whole family.
1 person likes this
@mjmlagat (3171)
• Philippines
8 Oct 08
Hello my friend. There are just painful realities in life we need to endure, the most painful of all if they pertain to events involving our loved ones. Whether we like them or not, we need to face them rationally and courageously. Keep up the spirit, the Lord watches over you and your loved ones.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
8 Oct 08
Well I truly do hope that the time she spends in jail will straighten her out a little bit, and I also hope that your county can provide for her classes to stop her habits. I don't know how hard it can be to break a habit like that but I can only imagine that it would be hard to do. Her children are so young so luckily do not realize what is happening to her, but I do hope that they can open up a place in her heart and make her realize that she needs to straighten up for her children, she needs to get rid of her loser boyfriend and she needs to find a real man, a real job, and maybe a real degree.
1 person likes this
@underdogtoo (9601)
• Philippines
8 Oct 08
It is very sad to see a life being wasted like this. Who knows what really goes on inside of this tortured soul? I am at a loss for words.
@rusty2rusty (6747)
• Defiance, Ohio
8 Oct 08
I am sorry you are dealing with all of this. I have a sister who went through a bunch of crap like this. Even went to jail twice. But finally woke up and grew up. I will think positive that good thinsg will start going to those littles ones way.
1 person likes this
@villageanne (8579)
• United States
7 Oct 08
Wow That is a terrible situation to be in. You cannot make anyone do something they don't want to do. We tried to help my brother in law change his life but after 3 months, he went back to his old ways.
1 person likes this