how do you define, what a girlfriend is?

India
October 17, 2008 7:57am CST
i have a close friend and we have been with each other since the time we were in our nappies. we have shared every moment together - goo, bad, sorrowfull, cheerfull....in other words we have lived each others moments so well that even if we are missing from the picture for days together....nobody in the family raised any doubts! "i always thought, a girl who is a friend is a girlfriend" during college, a girl comes into my life. we spend moments together, go out and once out of the blue to them as her boyfriend. i agree to it too....at the end of graduation she pops in the question of marriage. i reply back saying i need time to think it over, and on one of those times when i was off with my close friend on those days apart trips; she comes on the scene calling me two-faces cheater and then starts crying. more than me ,my close friend was amused at this and started laughing. following close behind i couldn't stop myself and started laughing too..... guys around, tell me to atleast to give this girl a chance. A CHANCE!!! to so what?i explained to her that i don't know her that well,that i could think about living a life with her-i just didn't think about living a life with her- i just didn't think it that way. as for her she calls me a DORK, and tells me i ruined her life.... damn someone told me, this could answer questions ....what the heck is she trying to imply, if the only definition of girlfriend i know doesn't suit her of any body on this god forsaken earth.....
1 person likes this
9 responses
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
17 Oct 08
A girl friend is a girl who is a friend, but she took it to mean a lesbian relationship, that a girl friend is a girl you have s*x with. It shows you how things have deteriorated now, that even a platonic relationship can be called something else. Why not be straight and ask her, are two girls not allowed to be friends unless they have s*x? That will shut her up and if it does not, then tell her that "I guess I cannot be friends with so and so, I have to be her acquaintance."
• India
17 Oct 08
Thanks for that suggestion. I will try it once for sure. But i think i will become rude on her. Whatever it may be i will give it a try.
• Germany
18 Oct 08
Somewone could tell me please how i can create a new discussion?
@tintusam (1169)
• India
18 Oct 08
Girlfriend is not just a feeling about a person. "Oh I really like her, she's my girlfriend" that is incorrect. A girlfriend is as definite as a businessman. For someone to be a girlfriend, a guy should already have courted her or asked her to be his girlfriend. If a guy did not do that yet, then she is not yet the girlfriend of the guy, not matter how much the guy likes her.
@luvandpower (2049)
• United States
17 Oct 08
My dad had always told me when you find the girl that YOU want to spend the rest of your life with, you will just know it, dont ask what feeling ot look for, you just know it somehow someway. If this girl can't accept the fact that you need to think about a lifelong decision what would that make someone think? If a person is told the earth is flat so to speak then are you going to take it as just proof? No. You know deep down inside somewhere what is right and what is wrong. I can't tell you the definition of a girlfriend, because every person is unique, a girlfriend is supposed to be that person who will stick by your side and just care for you which eventually evolves into something more. If you have had a lifelong friend this whole time and she starts crying, I reccomend going to the lifelong friend, you understand her, you know what she has been through, what she has struggled with. It is better to be with someone who truly cares for you and you have been able to see that from over years of experience then instead of a girl you just met and went to school with. I am blabbing all of this because I went through a very similar mistake in high school, dont mess up your life.
• Nigeria
17 Oct 08
a girlfriend is an helper, one who helps you, comforts you, cheer you up when you are feeling down and uplifts you when the whole world seems to be goin against you. thats who a girlfriend is
@k4karthik (439)
• India
17 Oct 08
In my view girl friend is friend with whom we can share our bad moments and good moments. In your case may be because of some of your behavior she felt like that. Convince her. Don't go away as she is your friend.
@belk89 (1103)
• Philippines
17 Oct 08
A girlfriend is someone who stand by your side at times when you are down and shares with you happiness when something great happen. Doesnt necessary means someone you wanna marry someday but she can be someone who can be your friend. Someone who is there to support you and vice versa. I guess this girl expected too much and was hoping you would think of marrying her someday. Specially that you have both shared lots of wonderful memories together and she was already hoping it will be forever.
• United States
17 Oct 08
Thats a tough one, Though I gotta say I would feel kinda threatened by my guy hanging out a lot with another girl even if he did know her his entire life, and even if they didnt consider themselves boyfriend/girlfriend... I think she is looking for something permanent, and if you dont think it will turn into a permanent or if she is rushing too fast for you, I would recomend break it off, its not kind to waste her time, and she probably doesnt want you to hang out with your friend... its a lot to consider... I dont envy you atm XD
• Malaysia
17 Oct 08
Hi Tousif1988, according to Wiki: "Girlfriend is a term that can refer to either a female partner in a non-marital romantic relationship or a female non-intimate friend. The term is most commonly used to describe any female person who is in a romantic relationship with another person." So can see that the situation get great or worst is also due to how close the relationship. Believe if there have a baselines between normal girl friend vs actual girlfiend, then the situation would be much more better then.