My papa has a girlfriend!!!

@my2boys (821)
United States
October 22, 2008 8:51am CST
My four year old son told me that my husband (his father) has a girlfriend. He said that he took my son to her house and that she came to the hospital when I recently had our second son. My husband tells me that he is just making it up but my son normally does not make things like that up. Also i did not ask him anything we were just sitting on the couch watching tv one day and he told me. He even describes her to me. He has said it more than once. And his story is the same every time. Since he is so young dont you thik if he were making it up his story would change at least a little. DO you think i am making too much out of it? Could my son be making it up? I dont think so because i know him and i know some little kids make up stories but I have never heard him make one up.
9 people like this
40 responses
@ersmommy1 (12605)
• United States
22 Oct 08
Ouch. That is difficult. I don't know, I'd like to think that he may just be confused or making it up. That would be the easiest explanation. But since in my experience kids are brutally honestyou may want to investigate this one a little further.
5 people like this
• Philippines
22 Oct 08
when I was young my dad brought me to the house of his girlfriend too. I did not understand clearly yet what was going on but now that I think about it and after my mom told me he has another woman, I suddenly was able to put two and two together. It was really sad but I am over it now. I just feel bad that he had to bring me there. I still hate the woman though!
@lrglara (1343)
• Philippines
22 Oct 08
i dont want your husband to look bad, but yes... i think you should listen to your son. most of the time, we brush off what the children's say thinking they are just making it up. i dont have a kid, but i do like hanging out with kids and observing them. you will definitely know when a kid is lying. you can easily catch them. i just think there's some truth to what your son is saying. :)
4 people like this
@gemini_rose (16194)
22 Oct 08
I have four children, and what I know is this, they do not lie at that age, they speak as they see. He may be getting confused, but he is probably not lying. So no, I do not think that your son is making it up or lying.
3 people like this
• Brazil
22 Oct 08
I have two children and I agrew with you!
3 people like this
@subha12 (18463)
• India
23 Oct 08
generally little children do not tell lies. so i guess there must be something real in it. try to find out in other ways . it may help u. If u find something then confront your husband
3 people like this
@misshoney (973)
• Philippines
23 Oct 08
hello my2boys. gosh your husband is such a denial king. i really think that your son is not making it up. i think to be really sure you need to do your own investigation so you will. it is very unlikely for a child to make up things like that so if i were in your shoes, i would get really suspicious and demand lenghty explanations from my husband.
3 people like this
@sedel1027 (17868)
• United States
23 Oct 08
What does your gut tell you? Normally when your spouse or SO is cheating you know, in your gut. Could your son just be misunderstanding, like the woman is someone your husband works with and ran into while he was out with your son?
3 people like this
• Lubbock, Texas
23 Oct 08
Not to be putting your husband down, but by him saying your son is making it up sounds to me like he's the one that's lying. If he had explained that there was a visit to a friend or co worker's house, and that that person had also been at the hospital it would be a different matter.
3 people like this
@tonniek02 (457)
• United States
22 Oct 08
Your child is 4 years old, I don't think he would be lieing to you...My father also took me to (what he called a good friends house) one day. I was very hurt at him. And when he came home with a hicky on his shoulder he told my mother I bit him... I came home from school to get jumped out by my mother for bitting my dad and I didn't even know what she was talking about. When he got home and she confrounted him on it he look me right in the face and called me a Da#m lier. Don't let it get that far...Remember the only one that counts are you and your kids....Fallow him if you really need to know the truth. If I had followed my ex- I would have not wasted 10 years of my life on a love that was only a lye..
3 people like this
• India
22 Oct 08
i dont think there is a problem with your husband...after all it may be just a friend....if not he amy try to hide it from u and ur son...i feel u are making alot out of it...and if u feel any doubt feel free and be frank to question ur husband...because as far as u keep quiet,the doubt grows in your mind and it will end in serious trouble....
3 people like this
@soccermom (3200)
• United States
22 Oct 08
Four year olds generally tell the truth, they do not have the mental capability to make something like this up. However, you have to find out what the definition of "girlfriend" is to your 4 year old. My 3 year old refers to daddy's "girlfriend" all the time, and it is jsut one of his very harmless co workers. But in his little mind she is a girl and a friend. Plus it would take an insane amount of gonads for him to have her at the hospital after you had a baby. Look into it before you jump to conclusions.
@jonesy123 (3950)
• United States
22 Oct 08
At that age kids don't make things up like that. They might try and lie in order to get out of trouble when you question them, but usually it's easy to detect. Stuff like this probably not. Personally, I would further investigate. It would have been easier if your husband would have laughed it off and said I took him with me, when I dropped something off at xyz's house on my way to visit you at the hospital. When xyz found out I was going to the hospital she asked if I could give her a ride because she wanted to visit abc. But to shrug it off as 'made up'... well, something is not right there, especially for your son to label her as girlfriend which indicates that he witnessed something that tells him it's closer than just casual 'friend'.
3 people like this
@psspurgeon1 (1110)
• United States
22 Oct 08
Are you still with your husband? Oh wow, thats bad. I tend to trust some of those "off the wall" things my child says. WTF about her coming to the hospital? You know, kids pick up on the subtle things that some adults dont. Also, if he comes from a loving home he may be able to recognize behaviors/affections of parents so maybe he's picking up on a bond your husband has with another woman. Like, maybe hubby plays it off but son recognizes the behavior and links it to love/relationship... So I guess it is possible that your son witnessed a relation that was similar to things his mommy and daddy do and recognized it as his father having a girlfriend. Any way I look at it it seems to be not good. I do wish you the best of luck and I hope you can catch your breath as I can see feeling I got suckerpunched if something like that came from my childs mouth!
3 people like this
@rizzu87 (860)
• Malaysia
23 Oct 08
I think your son is just 11 years old, and i dont think that he could lie so easily and he is not making any stories. There should be a girlfriend of your husband. I am sorry to say that but thats what i think. I think you have to find out more abt all this.
• China
23 Oct 08
Maybe he is afraid that his father will have a girlfriend, he wants you to stop that happening, as a little kid, he doesn't hope he will have a new mother.so you must think it over and have a direct and sincere talk with him to know about his real thought. deep understanding and concern are the best tools to give a kid a friendly and lovely world.
2 people like this
• India
23 Oct 08
o dat can be very bad.....
@jamesgrub (673)
• United States
23 Oct 08
the liar is not your son.......its his dad. i dont think a kid would just make that up. especially a young one.
2 people like this
@austere (2816)
• Philippines
23 Oct 08
you'll have your way of knowing if it's true or not.. try to observe your husbands actions.. they say children never lie.. but who really knows...:( just dont judge at this point yet.. we dont have facts and all you have is your sons words against his father..use your son's words to know the truth.. you'll soon find out.. but try not to be shadowed by emotions right now.. be srong and try to find the truth..
@Shellyann36 (7993)
• United States
23 Oct 08
If your son is telling you this I feel you should trust what he is saying. It is hard to imagine how a man can be so dumb as to take your child around his woman on the side. I am sorry that you and your son have been subjected to this. Please do what you think is best to take care of yourself and both of your boys!
@Hatley (154691)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Oct 08
my2boys this is a hard one. he is pretty little to be telling stories as kids that young can be frightenly honest. I think Iwould check this out. If he told this to you perhaps he is somewhat worried about this as he doesnt understand just what is going on, and maybe his dad told him not to tell you, thatcould be why he seemedto have to tellyou this over again.thelittle guy seems a bit worried.
2 people like this