Would you prefer marriage through proposals or through love?

@nilugo (348)
Singapore
October 30, 2008 11:17pm CST
In my culture, marriage is mostly done through proposals -ie. the parents or relatives seek suitable partners for their children and if the children like each other, then the marriage is taken place. But in this day and age, that method is slowely deteriorating and many young people find their own partners. But I wonder if this is the reason that there is so much divorces these days? What would you do if you had the choice - consider proposals from your parents/relatives or find your own partner?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@bbsr13 (4198)
• India
31 Oct 08
Hello,Nilu! I am for arranged marriage.I have no faith in love marriage as it fails in most cases.In a love marriage the couple live together for years and finish everything so they lose the charm of the marriage.but in arranged marriage love starts after marriage which has special charm.The relationship lasts for ever.This is our culture.I had married my wife 39 years back.It was an arranged marriage.Neither of us knew each other before marriage.For the first time we met in the honeymoon night and since then started loving each other.
@nilugo (348)
• Singapore
31 Oct 08
That is so lovely. I am so happy for you. My marryage is also an arranged marriage through my parents, but we met each other before and got to know each other for about 5 months before marriage. And I love him very much.
@vipulchawla (2220)
• India
31 Oct 08
I believe that every relationship starts with trust and grows naturally..Whether be it love or arranged the relationship can only nurture if both the people understand each other well and go together.. Even love also starts when you start caring about the other person.. Problems would have come up even if you would have chosen to do a love marriage but its good that u came up well against them and learnt to adjust.. Oh about me.. I m still single ..i m just 24 yaar.. And neither i nor my family would go against love marriage if i do.. but i have to find a love b4 to think of that..LOL..So i don't mind what so ever it be because each of the two has its own pros and cons... If its an arranged marriage, it would have been with the consent of your family, so they will be always willing to solve any family matters, but ya if its a love marriage, you had ur own choice of choosing ur won life partner, so you cannot blame anyone for anything going wrong after ur marriage. But i still belive, it all lies in the hands of the couple, how they manage the relationship!!
@nilugo (348)
• Singapore
31 Oct 08
Hi Vipilchawla, you are definitely right -in the end, the final decision is with the couple.
1 person likes this
@summerli (110)
• China
31 Oct 08
i would like to find my love myself,and i believe i can come across someday somewhere that fate fixs on
@nilugo (348)
• Singapore
31 Oct 08
I am sure you will find your love soon.
@marty3888 (2359)
• United States
31 Oct 08
This was a topic a few days ago - arranged marriages. I myself don't prefer that. I know that those have a much more chance of surviving, but I would much rather spend my life with the person I want to be with; not someone who thinks I should be with.
@nilugo (348)
• Singapore
31 Oct 08
Well in mot arranged marriages, you do get the chance to see if you like the person and get to know him/her for sometime before you decide if you want to go ahead. But I guess both methods have pros and cons. Thanks for your response.