What would you do if your friend lost your stuff?

in a dilemma - How to solve the problem?
China
November 3, 2008 7:19am CST
Have you had this experience?Well,my classmate had and she complained that to me.Her friend wanted to borrow her digital camera.It's expensive and she liked it very much.So she was hesitant at first.However,she didn't want to deny her friend and borrowed it finally.Some days later,her friend said she lost the camera and she felt very sorry for that.But she didn't said she would replace the camera . My classmate was in a dilemma.She wanted to ask her friend to replace the camera but feared that she would lose this friend.She don't know what to do now. So have any mylotter had this kind of experience yet? How do you solve this problem?
3 people like this
36 responses
@ebought (56)
3 Nov 08
Your friend needs to be upfront about wanting a replacement for the lost digital camera. Quite frankly, your friend shouldn't even have to ask this. The girl who lost the digital camera should know that she should replace something she has lost. It sounds as though the girl who lost the camera, isn't really that good a friend anyway. And therefore your friend shouldn't be afraid to ask for her camera to be replaced.
2 people like this
• United States
3 Nov 08
I like your post
1 person likes this
@lishiwei (1553)
• China
4 Nov 08
I think many of us may experience that and so do I!It's really very difficult to deal with this kind of situation.I think it's her friend's problem,she should replace to her while she lost other's stuff.There is no need to let others remind her.
1 person likes this
• China
5 Nov 08
Yeah,i agree with you.This kind of things happen everyday.Sometimes we buy a new expensive stuff and we really take care of it .When a friend come to borrow it,maybe at first we feel uneasy,but you konw,that's a friend,so finaly we always decide to lend it to friend.It's just so hard to say "no" to friends.
@lishiwei (1553)
• China
5 Nov 08
Yes,it's really very hard to say 'no' to others.But sometimes we really need to learn to say that to others.
@Beruang (1309)
• Malaysia
4 Nov 08
If that happened to me I would beat up my friend and then I would pay somebody to beat my friend again and then I will ask my friend to replace my camera. If my friend does not want to do that, I will beat him or her again. Just kidding! Dealing with friends is a delicate situation and needs to be handled in such a way that the friend get the idea that he or she has the responsibility to replace what he or she had lost. If i were your you, I would advise your classmate to politely request that the lost camera be replaced. Make up a story or something such as the camera was a birthday gift from her parents or something and it would be really bad if the parents found out that the camera is missing. Give options to the friend such as if she does not have the money now, she can pay in installments or something and workout the payment. However, if that does not get the friend to response in an acceptable way, a bit of threat would be fine such as she can tell her friend that her parents would speak to the parents of the person who lost the camera so that it can be replaced... Well, if they are really friends, then she does not need to do all these as real friends would find ways to apologize and replace the item without being asked to do it. Cheers!
• China
5 Nov 08
Thank you for your response.That's a good idea.
• Australia
4 Nov 08
hmm i have had a similar experience but it was money, not a camera. i usually solve this by telling them pay me back later or slowly. or they just give me a present to make up for it. an apology is great but compensation is better regards, bboyzahid
1 person likes this
• Australia
4 Nov 08
i would also like to say that my friendship is always there, whatever happens because im great friends with him and its always good to know that they are truly sorry =P
1 person likes this
@langba (65)
• China
4 Nov 08
try your best to find it ,if it is really lost ,forget it ,no matter what you do and how sad you feel ,it can't be find now .be carefully next time .
1 person likes this
@katkat (2379)
• Philippines
4 Nov 08
That's a hard question but for me if she's a true friend or a friend it doesn't matter, there's nothing wrong in asking to replace it. She/he borrow it, and that it it is supposed to be returned to the owner. It was his/her responsibility. I don't think it would hurt the friendship if they are trully friends. Camera's today are expensive and that along should be considered.
1 person likes this
@yangshuai (136)
• China
4 Nov 08
first of all,that's not a piece of nice news.despite it's important or expensive .if it's not valuable,maybe nothing will shock me.but if it's fairly expensive,it will update my mind.but how can i claim him?we are nice friends.if i don't,that means i will lose much.but look at the bright side,my friend know it worth a lot,i think he should comfort me even he pays for it.if he is not your nice friend,you are impossible to lend him.even though he is your truthly buddy and he know its importance,he will actively pay for what you lost.
1 person likes this
@metschica25 (5408)
• United States
3 Nov 08
Hello, well i have an awesome best friend now and if she said she lost the cam i would believe her, but when you are younger who knows really . You dont really know the value or money and think your friend can just get a new one and you can keep it . I like to think the girl is being honest that is being told in the story , but how do you lose a cam , and since it was not yours wouldnt you be real careful with it ?
1 person likes this
@marym14 (61)
• Ireland
3 Nov 08
Iv had the same problem as your friend.. Friends of mine have borrowed so much off me such as Clothes,shoes and jewellery Havnt got alot of it back either :(One time i left my ipod in a friends he took it to town with her and lost it on the bus She had the exact same ipod as me and I hadnt had it very long so i said it to her and she said that she had been feeling bad about it too so she gave me hers and later on got another for herself Your friend should confront her and tell her to atleast put some money towards buying a new after all it was her fault for loosing it Hope it helps xx
1 person likes this
@cutepenguin (6457)
• Canada
3 Nov 08
I think she kind of already has lost this friend. I mean, clearly the friend who lost the camera did it and isn't worried about losing the friendship. How much could the friend who lost the camera value the friendship if she will borrow something that is important to the original friend and lose it? I was always taught that if you borrow something, you return it in a timely manner.
1 person likes this
@kedves (728)
3 Nov 08
It is simple. The friend borrowed it and the friend should return it. if they lost it or broken it THEY must replace it. why should you suffer for their negligence. you lent them the camera in good faith that it will be returned as it was given. otherwise you would have just given them the money to buy themselves a camera. the onus is on the friend to replace it and you must stand firm and say that you expect it replaced. a true friendship would survive a false one will disappear but certainly your camera should be replaced.
1 person likes this
@theangel (61)
• Philippines
3 Nov 08
I think she have to tell the other in a nice way, or in a way that she won't get offended. Things like "i understand, but I badly need a camera, let's put up a way so we can replace it". Make the other party feel that she's not mad and that she is willing to work the problem out together. And that she is also willing to help.
• Philippines
3 Nov 08
I think she has to replaced it. If you borrow something, then, therefore, you are accountable to what you have borrowed. Thanks,.
@inder86 (566)
• Gibraltar
3 Nov 08
what would you have done if by chance that camera had fallen from your hand and had broken or if you had lost it ? you cant do any thing now. just forget it . if your friend replaces you then feel lucky or just simply think it fall from your hand and got broken. don't take tension. thing happens.
• China
3 Nov 08
It really make some sense.I will tell that to my classmate.
@umart13 (841)
• Ireland
7 Nov 08
Hello hongqistreet, what a difficult question to answer! Well I think it would be a great test of a friendship, if something very precious or valuable was lost by a friend. After all a friend is somebody who can be trusted and you gave this person something in trust, which they lost or broke. However, what's done is done and then the decision has to be made, whether the future friendship is worth more than the object lost, or whether the incident shows that the friendship is not as strong as you originally thought. Anyway I hope you are not really faced with such a choice. Have a god weekend. Umart
@fifileigh (3619)
• United States
6 Nov 08
i wouldnt lend anything expensive to anyone. i wouldnt even lend my cheap stuff to anyone...
• Philippines
6 Nov 08
Been in that situation.My mom really got furious because that person said she would replace the item that she lost but she never did.It was bad for us since I can hand it down to my sister so we don't have to buy a new one.
@quinnkl (1668)
• United States
5 Nov 08
First and foremost any friend who lost or broke anything they borrowed or used of another's friend would certainly offer to pay or replace it up front in my opinion. Why hasn't the friend done that? If it were me I would say, hey, I paid a lot money for that camera, and I need you to replace it. If the friend can't afford it all at once set up a payment plan. Losing a friend who doesn't care about "losing" you things, is not losing a real friend in my opinion.
@xiaoyue (206)
5 Nov 08
Well,I think it depends on the value of the stuff.However,whether the lost stuff is valuable or not,I will feel very angry if my friends lost it.But if the lost thing is not valuable,I will be Ok soon.
• Philippines
5 Nov 08
I havent experience this kind of situation. If a friend of mine would lose a precious thing, I would want her to replace it with a new one. I would address my friend like "i've worked hard for that thing and I cant believe it's lost now." If I were the one to have lost a friend's thing, definitely I would replace it.
@Roseo8 (2947)
• India
5 Nov 08
Oh its really bad if your classmates friend lost the expensive camera she borrowed..Its her duty to replace it,otherwise she is not a true friend....Fortunately for me,I have never had such a bad experience....All my friends have been good so far...........