Keep trying to get it right.teenager.
November 28, 2008 5:23pm CST
Teenagers wow, have you got one, a form of human being ,who can be so sweet and within minutes change into something from the other side.My teenager is very good at spending money. Having his airs,using up his airtime on his mobile and treating me and his father like we are something out of date.My husband says to him sometimes remember who feeds you and pays for everything.He just looks in disgust and storms upstairs saying "thats right chuck it all in my face,just like you always do,if thats all you have got to fight with I suggest you stop now" all we asked him to do was clean his room,but he takes it as an insult,his favourite saying is "what ever" "you are always getting at me" "you are just trying to ruin my life" and our all time favourite "who do you think you are talking to".I suppose they are all the same.Sometimes we wonder why we bother,but we do and we will continue to do so,because whatever happens he is a vunerable and frightened young person growing up in this world.
28 Nov 08
I habe two teenage sons. One is almost 17 and the other 14. When they were approaching the teen years we talked a lot about the physical changes that would happen, those wonderful hormones that seem to drive teens crazy. These years are a real roller coaster of emotions wanting to be independent but not wanting tp leave the security of home. Setting clear boundaries helps, also teaching that actions leads to consequences helps. For example my oldest son attends a corrospondence school for high school, the campus is in the next city. One year ago he went every Saturday and Sunday to the city, we found out later that he had not attended classes, so the consequence for that was instead of having a months holiday he had to work in the fields helping his grandmother. If he doesn't graduate high school that would be the only work available for him. He has learnt his lesson. I think for your son it might help to sit him down and explain that the airtime for his mibile has to last so long, once he has finished it thats it he will have to wait to get more. Good luck, I always thought that once the kids got out of the toddler stage life would be easier, I don't think so!! Jacks
29 Nov 08
What a waste of everybodys time and not to mention the money,You sound wonderful parents and have a good balance.My son loves school and is doing very well, we do catch up with the school and check up on him ,I know you are supposed to trust them but i think if you don't it can lead to trouble.They are a breed apart from the rest of us and i would love to meet someone with all the answers ,but theories are all they can come up with.Normally from people who have never had kids but like statistics.To try so hard to make things easier for them and to be let down so badly my heart goes out to you.Take care of yourself as well as they will make you ill if you let them,all you can do is steer them in the right direction and hope for the best,if he does not graduate it will not be your fault,maybe it will be the wake up call he needs, he will probably go back to school,work two jobs that is what normally happens but promise me you will not beat yourself up.It is not your fault.xxx
30 Nov 08
My oldest son really turned himself around this past few months. I am very proud of him, my husband was in hospital for 3 weeks, we live in Japan and my Japanese is okay for shopping etc but I can't read or right (well maybe first grade level!). My son managed to keep hubbys business going, sending emails and dealing with customers. He also kept up with his study and is starting his own business as a magician to earn money for university. I think the time in the fields really taught him a lesson, plus he encourages his youner brothers and sister to study. Jacks
28 Nov 08
Honestly we are here to be parents to our teenagers and must understand they will hate us for the rules we impose. Your husband is right in saying to your son what he did "remember who feeds you etc" I think it's time your son really learn this meaning. You have the power to take away his gadgets. Does he have an outside source of income if so you can tell him if he disrespects you and if he wants his things back that he'll have to prove it to you guys. Sure he'll pitch a fit but it seems as though he's run his line too thin now. If my child ever said who do you think your talking to I wouldn't hesitate to chuck him in his room and take away EVERYTHING he took for granted. Respect is lacking here and you need to try to gain it back the best you can. I'm appealed he would talk to you guys this way however he's taking an inch and a mile. He's testing to see where his limits are. Show him where they are. Ground him , do whatever means you can go gain some control and respect back from him. Teens will often do this. they'll be nice when they want something then after that they do what they want. Like I said I really think you should take away what he takes for granted so he doesn't disrespect you like this. I'm sorry this even happening. I find that that teens are the harshest individuals on this earth. They say what they want with no reservations at what it will do to others and how it hurts people.