What would you do if your partner is an ADDICT ...to online games?

@pitsay (173)
Philippines
November 30, 2008 12:15pm CST
I am having a problem with regards to my hubby's addiction, well i'm thankful though that he is not into the illegal stuff, you know what i mean, but this addiction hes into is turning him into a different person. I really love my husband, somewhere in between i really misses him. But as the years past as he gets more hook on his Online game, he seems to be moving far from me and the kids even if he is literally close to me. I tried confronting him about the issue but he misunderstood me. Right know i just sit quite and realizing that its useless talking to him. Besides i dont want to get into an argument. It will only lead into a fight and shouting and nagging, and i dont want it that way. I just miss him and i hope he could return back to us, just like before. And i really do hope that this online games goes to hell...excuse me but i am just mad, i hope those online game lover doesnt make it an issue. So tell me how and what would i do? Did i do the right thing?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@modstar (9610)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
How many hours does it take before he stops playing online games? I don't know but if you can be patient about it then maybe he will outgrow online games. Meaning, he'll get tired of it sooner or later. I have a friend's who's like your husband. He's my bestfriend. We talk about games all the times. Computers mostly. I'm not sure but i think his wife is not happy about it either. Sometimes i want to tell my friend to stop minding about us because he needs to tend to his family. His wife told my other friend's wife that my bestfriend doesn't bring her for a walk anymore. She's always at home attending to their 1 year old baby. I feel guilty for my friend but there's nothing i can do because it's his personal life.
@pitsay (173)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
His an addict, you just imagine how many hours he spend playing OL games. I am thankful now that the installer of the game here in our PC is not working anymore, but before he stays until 1 in the morning, and when he wakes up like 6am he will immediately open the computer and go on line. But, still we have a PC in the shop, which the OL game is working fine. And there he would play from 10am until 8pm (closing time).
@modstar (9610)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
Well i guess addiction is hard to beat. i myself is an internet addict. It took me years before i got tired of it. Now, i'm still hooked on internet but i can afford to spend some time on whoever wants to spend some time with me now like friends, family.
@pitsay (173)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
The only big problem is that there is no cure for internet game addiction lol =)...its a self realization right?
• Philippines
30 Nov 08
I'm online game addict, every time my sweetheart visits me, she always gets annoyed because i don't give her attention, sadly she left a month ago, to late for me to think, the time she's gone that's the time i realize that i miss her. Now i can't win her back, because she already loved somebody. In your situation, its a good thing that hes only addict to online games, it is more painful if hes addict on some things, at least you know that he is a online game addict and you have an idea what he is doing rather than thinking on what is doing, you just need more patient on him, that addiction is just temporary, i understand that he is lacking giving attention to his family and you miss him, why not apply this quotation " If you can't beat them, join them". I'm amaze with your understanding and patience, but you need more patience. Good luck to you.
@pitsay (173)
• Philippines
30 Nov 08
And that is what i dont want to happen to him, realizing that its too late because i gave up on him. I am still keeping my patience very very tight because if i will not any time i am ready to let go. My kids would eventually understand if we go on separate ways. I really do hope that he change before i quit on him. I dont mind at all his addiction its just that hes missing his obligation on us. And about joining him because i cant beat him, i have done that too =)...to no avail =(...
• Philippines
30 Nov 08
This is really a problem, when did he starts to become an online addict? the time you got married is he already an online addict? or he become online addict after marriage. There's a reason behind on this, why not talk to him and make him decide on what's really his priority in life.? His answer would be the basis of your decision. Is he neglected his all his responsibility? Like providing good education to his children, etc.
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
10 Dec 08
[i]Hi pitsay, I guess you need to discuss the issue with him more, and tell him to be open-minded, He has a family and he has an obligation to you and the kids.... Anyway, this issue is familiar to me, I have a friend who has a husband like this and she kept on nagging and telling her hubby that she needs his time, it almost end up to separation and when she was about to leave, her hubby realized that it was his fault and apologize to her....I don't like to say do it like the way my friend did, but, the point is, it is ideal to put the issue on the table with both open heart and mind![/i]
@kykidd (6819)
• United States
30 Nov 08
It sounds like you tried to talk to him calmly and rationally about it. Maybe he will have to realize what is going on, on his own. Sometimes it takes a big hammer to hit us in the head before we realize when we are doing something like this. You could try making some plans, and while you are making them, if he is too busy to talk because he is online just make them with you and your kids. Then maybe he will see he is missing out on all of the fun and watching the children grow up and he will step away from the computer. Good luck to you, it sounds like you are really an understanding person! Have a good day!
@pitsay (173)
• Philippines
30 Nov 08
I have tried this too, i am just so sad why is this happening to him. Sometimes i feel like getting out, i think that would be the most easiest thing to do, but i still consider our kids. If i could use a "hammer" indeed=) just to hit him hard and make him see what was going on between us and our marriage. Thanks for sharing. I really need someone to talk to about this...