I am Single for Long time. Would I get Married Someday?

@sdas86 (6076)
Malaysia
December 4, 2008 12:01am CST
I am afraid that I will be single for whole life. I am single for very long time and I never have a relationship before. I really afraid that I will not get married in the future. What should I do?
6 people like this
17 responses
@jlamela (4909)
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
Oh goodness!we have the same fear.lol!actually this is also my worries that sometimes cause depression. I am also single for the longest time and never had any relationship before and began to feel some creepy things deep inside. My ultimate wish is to get married and have kids, but 2008 is almost over and my dream to have a relationship for this year and get married next year seemed only an illusion. Since we have the same fear, well what can we do but wait and wait and wait until the day we meet that special person and I don't know when that happen. I am beginning to lose patience regarding this situation, I even begin questioning myself why life is so unfair, why there's seem to be an endless conquest to be noticed. So what will you do now is pray and pray and ask God's help and peace of mind. Try also to be honest with yourself what type of person you want to spend the rest of your life, one the great lessons I've learned is that maybe I was not that really specific what kind of person I want. If you mingle in the group try to observe other people, who knows your future partner is just around the corner.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks a lot for your response. It seems that there are quite a lot of people that is in the same problem like me. I will try to look around me. Maybe I will find the special person.
1 person likes this
@bjcyrix (6910)
• Philippines
12 Jan 09
Ive had that fear too and I still think that of myself but with the way things are going in my life I can believe that I will get married someday. Its just up to me if Id be willing to accept whoever fate or God pairs me with. As for you, you're a guy, with the male-female ratio in this world you have lots of possible choices and whoever that girl is, she's a lucky one to find someone who will love her. What should you do? Well you're on the right track on this one cause Ive read your other discussions, hehehe. All I can say i there's no harm in trying and if time wasnt on your side for that date, simple try and try again Goodluck!^_^
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks. I will try and try until success.
1 person likes this
@bjcyrix (6910)
• Philippines
19 Jan 09
Hehehe, you're welcome.^_^
@srganesh (6350)
• India
5 Dec 08
Hai! I checked out your profile and learned you are just 21.It is not a long time to stay single.This is the time you have to focus on your career and win a good job and to lay a strong foundation for your upcoming future.Dont be worried because there are more years to come.Does all your friends get married at this age?What is the averge age to get married in your place?Consider all the facts and be optimistic!In our areas about 25 or 27 is the right age to get married.Cheer up!
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
In my area, around 25 to 30 is the age to get married. One of my cousin who is same age as me is already married and he already have a son.
15 Jan 09
Hi, You are so young. Trust me after seeing my case of marriage, i am a firm believer of marriage are made in heaven.God will send the right partner for you in the right time, nothing will happen before time. will pray you get the right person of your life early
• Philippines
19 Jan 09
how old are you by the way...if 30 years, 40 years and 50 years old above have the chance and possibility to get married and how come you think about this idea..why are you afraid..it's God will..if we are destined not to get married or to get married at early age...
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
19 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks. I will let it to God to decide.
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
19 Jan 09
Hi there. Being single drives people crazy by wanting to be married. On the other hand, being married too makes people wish they'd been single. That's the irony of life, and that's why man/woman's wants are said to be insatiable. I know, like you, many would like to be married one day, I am that person too. But after a long while now, I realize that wanting to be married actually gives great stress to you (if you have no partner or prospects) and only keeps these guys farther and farther away. You know that guys are allergic to commitment right? I actually had the same mistake a few months back with my boyfriend. I was so stressed out at being 28 and not yet getting married while my other friends have started tying the knot and having kids. I didn't want him to see that I'm stressed, so I was denying that I wanted to get married. But it's obvious and is written in everything I did. I turn, he was stressed too because he did want to get married to me but he wasn't just ready financially and was too stressed because he felt that he can't make me happy and all. Well, to make the long story short, our relationship went on the rocks. We were both stressing out and we failed to see the real reason behind every relationship. We failed to look into what's important because we wanted to be 'like everyone else'. We were almost at the end of our rope when finally all hell break loose, he cheated, I got angry and we were at the brink of breaking up! Well, actually we broke up. We both had few weeks off from each other. Gathered our sanity back and realized we still loved each other. As for my side. I did realize that me wanting to get married and being afraid of my age took toll on our relationship. I could remember that every step, every conversation, and every thing about me was trying to make him propose. Yeah, I was that pathetic, but I didn't really say it out loud. And instead of loving him, I ended up pushing him away since every time he made a mistake, made a comment and everything I'd get frustrated and angry. So now, at the new phase of my life. I've come to realize, getting married isn't about me wanting to be married. It should be two couples wanting to be married to each other because both want to share their lives together. Both should be emotionally prepared and should have done what they wanted to do when they were single, so that there wouldn't be any regrets and so that both could spend the lifetime talking about it and happy that they are together. We're back together, and this time, I am no longer paranoid about getting married. I know that he loves me, and I love him too. But I don't know if he's the one for me (as God chooses). Yes, I do love him and want him, but it's better to let God choose because He knows all and it's not stressful too. So now, we're enjoying each others' company. And if he shall be my life partner, I'd be thankful, but should he not be the one, I know he'll know that we've done all we can and enjoyed our time together.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
19 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks for the long response. You are right that the more we hope for something, the more stress we have. I will try to relax and let fate decide.
@munhozmib (3857)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
18 Jan 09
Hello there. Being single is not a big deal. Everybody can get in a relationship if they want to. Just don't expect people to accept you. If nobody likes you, then something is wrong, and you should probably change something with you, be it physical or intellectual. You know, this kind of change may sound rubbish, but it is actually for your own better. Appearance can be changed. If you were born ugly, you can still look beautiful. If you are fat, you can still get thin. If you are too thin, you can still get fat. Just don't look for love outside of your own cluster. Love yourself, firstly, and change yourself for the simple fact that you love yourself. People will notice this and some will like you. Respectfully, Munhozmib.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
19 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks for the advice.
• Philippines
15 Jan 09
Being not into a relationship before doesn't mean that you will be single for the rest of your life. the right person for you will come on the right time. open up yourself to the people the interest you so that they will notice you. be friendly and approachable. There are a lot of people that I know of that they marry their first love. do not lose hope as long as you live there is hope. go out and enjoy yourself and before you know it you will met the person meant for you. Good luck and happy mylotting!!!
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks. I will try to be friendly.
1 person likes this
@teka44 (3425)
• Brazil
15 Jan 09
Hi sdas. Why not? everything can happen in life. Don't worry about the time because all happen in the right time. Be single isn't a bad thing and many times is the best thing. I know a woman that meet her husband at 61 and get marry at 62 years old. So you can see that everything can happen. Don't be hurried to marry because this way you can make a bad choice. Live and enjoy your life and you will see that in the right time you will meet your soul match. Good luck and have a nice day.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 09
Hi, Thanks. I will choose carefully.
• China
15 Jan 09
oh , my friend, I think we face the same problem, I also have been a single for a long time ,but I think the most difficult thing for me is not marriage, it is true love ,which deserve me wait for it.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
18 Jan 09
Hi, Let us wait together. Hopefully one day we will find true love.
@jesbellaine (4157)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
Hi There, that depends on you. If you want to be single forever then you will never get married but if you want a life with someone elseā€¦ probably you will meet a nice girl and marry her. Happy Mylotting and Holidays! Cheers!
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
6 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks. I want to get married and have my own happy family. I hope to meet a nice girl soon.
• India
5 Dec 08
i strongly belive that Marriages are made in heaven so there is some one who is born for you when times comes you will certainally you find your patner so dont worry and concentrate on your work and keep your mind tenstion free
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
6 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks. I think that I have to let fat to arrange for me.
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
Hahahaha! This made me laugh... sorry... i am not laughing at you. but somehow when I was not married yet... I was thinking the same question too! All I could say is dont lost hope. because there will always be hope.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks for the advice.
@rsa101 (13336)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
Well the way you think about it is what stopping you from getting into relationship. Try reversing your declaration. You declared it already in your statement that you are afraid that you will be single for the rest of your life. It might be that statement that is stuck on your mind that is stopping you from getting into one. So as a start try focusing on getting into a loving relationship and be happy with it. Visualizing things could sometimes help you with what you want in life.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks for the advice. I will follow your advice.
@Bebs08 (10690)
• United States
5 Dec 08
Oh!! my goodness!! hahaha how old are you now? as i understand, you are still a student, so, don't worry about your being single. You still have a bright future. You can find somebody that is worth to be your partner. Just focus on your studies now to earn a degree and find a good job then, get married when you are stable financially and emotionally. Good luck.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks a lot. Most of my friends are in a relationship but I am not. I feel quite stress. Anyway, I will take your advice.
@o_utsider (372)
• China
4 Dec 08
It is not the time to have a relationship for you.It is not the time to married for you.
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
I think that it is the time for me to have relationship because I am old enough. My brother who is now 18 years old are in a relationship but I am not.
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
hi if i may ask how old are you because you have said that you are single for a very long time and never had a relationship before. there is such a thing a single-blessedness wherein you are destined to be single. well you may be too choosy thats why you are still single at this point. better open yourself so that love can come in. you will never know may be someone from mylot is the one destined for you. LOL
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Thanks for your response. Maybe you are right. Maybe I am too choosy.
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
what you should do? to wait... id seen your just 21 years old, am 27 and yet still single.. God has His own time and own way. Godbless!
@sdas86 (6076)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
Hi, Thanks. I feel much better now. I will pray hard to God so that I meet the one special in my life. Best of luck to you too.