What will you do?

@caesarin (1091)
Indonesia
December 14, 2008 7:29pm CST
This is my current condition: 1. My family of four (2 daughters) live with my in-laws. 2. I'm broke and had lots of debt. 3. My father and brothers would like to help me but not much that they can do because they have financial difficulties too. I didn't came from a rich family but our bonds are tight. 4. My husband's parents whom I live with run a small business and grocery store which don't earn much but enough for basic expenses + sometimes they can travel abroad with their friends. 5. My husband's older brother is not so rich but they are above average. Because they live a nice house, their 2 children went to an int'l school that cost more than 5G a year, business that with hundreds thousand dollars of capital his wife enjoy branded fashion products, etc. 6. My husband's older sister and her husband are unemployed. It's their choice. They prefer to earn money from stock exchange plus anything that can let them earn money. I can't even describe what they do to my friends. Just anything and no permanent business. 7. Me and my husband had put all of our money in a small business but it doesn't run quite well. 8. My monthly expenses on children needs and other basics are much bigger than the business earnings can provide. 9. I don't fit well with my in laws because we are just totally in the opposite. Not that I have arguments with them all the time. We are good but inside I don't want to live with them if I can afford my own. I just keep my headache for myself. 10. I'm a university grad in English Literature and it seems not much of the job vacancy needs someone like me their company. I study what I like but now I think I'm a little bit regreting myself for being so selfish not to study those that can be use after graduation in the real job world. Question: Any suggestion what I try to do? Should I take a job offer that I could learn at work (on job training) but this job doesn't pay much? Even my expenses are still bigger that the job earns? Please, please help me. I don't know where to talk to, who to discuss with. Thanks very much in advance for any responses.
1 person likes this
7 responses
@rizzu87 (860)
• Malaysia
15 Dec 08
I think the best option in my opinion regarding you is that you can do this job training. It will pay less but later it would be beneficial for you. You can get a better job after that. You can live alone with your husband and be away from your in laws. But you have to look about the job opportunities first about on the job training which you are going to do. If there are more job opportunities for you to get a better paid job then i think this would be the best thing to do right now. Think about it. I hope this will help you somehow. be happy
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
16 Dec 08
Yeah, rizzu87. All of you are really supportive to me. I still haven't heard anything from the OJT company and so I'm still hoping to hear from other companies where I sent my applications too. And for the time being, I'll do some writing in myLot and other website that pays for writing. Thanks very much for responding.
@lingli_78 (12852)
• Australia
15 Dec 08
first of all, what i will do is i will try to cut down on my expenses and try to live within my budget... i always believe that God provides us with sufficient blessings... it is entirely up to us how to manage the blessings that He had given to us... secondly, i will take up whatever job that is offered to me at this difficult time... every little thing counts and can help to ease your financial burden... good luck... take care and have a nice day...
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
16 Dec 08
Hi Lingli_78! But there's no way to cut down expenses too much because all are basic needs. However, I've made up my mind that I'll look and take a job though the salary doesn't comply to my needs. Also I believe that God won't leave me alone in this. Everything is meant for a reason and there's no coincidence. I was not good in managing my financial issue but I'll learn the leasson from this. Thanks very much for responding.
@cbreeze (1209)
• United States
15 Dec 08
Depending on where you live, especially if you live in the states, your local employment office may have advisors who can help you find employment in your area of study or maybe show you how your area of study can translate into other professions in the employment market that have more opportunities available.
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
16 Dec 08
It came across my mind that I wish I were in a country where there's something like an employment consultant that can direct me to a job that fits my educational background and interest. But it's not possible for me in here. Thanks very much anyway. Thanks cbreeze.
@nangel78 (1459)
• United States
15 Dec 08
I was an English major as well. I know this is the infamous question we get with this major, but have you thought about teaching? I know it is not for everyone which is why I am not currently doing it, but thought I would throw that out there. I am working full time at job that well pays the bills. I would not say that I love it...but it is a paycheck.
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
16 Dec 08
Hi nangel78! I've tried teaching and truly, I should say that I can't teach. I don't have any feeling for it. Of course people would say that I'm a fool for not trying again to teach but how can I teach if I really can't. You know it can give your best if you don't enjoy what you're doing. My passion is not for teaching. I'm looking for something more. But I'm glad I have somebody that share the same "interest". Thanks very much for responding.
@checapricorn (16072)
• United States
15 Dec 08
[i]Hi caesarin, With your profession, I guess you can look for a job as a Teacher in any University and accept tutorial as a sideline! Then if you have time at night, you can also join several sites and submit your write ups since that is your field! Just do not mind about the rest of the Family members, focus with your family and stay happy with whatever you have and be contented and I know God has a reason for that and for sure that is only temporary once you will try your luck in finding a job, that will lead you to a more great career![/i]
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
15 Dec 08
Hi checapricorn! I tried to give a private lesson, teaching elementary students for about a month. That's all. Once I tried to explain a simple English grammar (when to use do and does) to my brother's friend. He just didn't get it. I didn't know about his reception but surely I have diffculties in explaining, meaning what I meant. My previous job was a little bit like translating plus doing some marketing. My boss was a foreigner which I enjoyed a lot in conversation. So that's how I use what I learnt at University. Maybe it sounds stupid to enjoy something that you have to pay so much while you can just take a short English course just to be able to speak English. But in the Uni, I didn't just study about the language but also the people, the character, the history that could help so much at my work. My brother also tell me to do things that you had advise me to do about the job and also about the situation I'm having now. So, I keep on saying that what I'm in now is temporary. God put me in this situation for a reason and I have to be strong until this is over. Thanks very much for your response.
@rosdimy (3936)
• Malaysia
15 Dec 08
Have you considered or tried writing online as a way to earn extra money? There are sites which currently are paying good money to those who are prepared to put extra effort in writing. With a degree in English literature this may not be much of a problem to you. Suggestions for you 1) Be active on myLot because you may have realised by now a member can earn a nice sum of extra money for quality postings. 2) Write blogs or articles on subjects or topics you are well versed in. Then join sites which pay writers for their writings. 3) Write a book and get it published. all the best rosdimy
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
15 Dec 08
Thanks very much for your suggestions. Right now I'm considering to be active in myLot again and perhaps researching on blogs. I'll learn how to write blogs and or articles. Anyway, thanks very much. God bless you.
@cdparazo (5769)
• Philippines
15 Dec 08
All I can say is you have the power to make your life easier by living within your means. Don't mind what other can do like your in laws and never depend on anybody. Do away with the 'latte factor' or those things that you can live without. For now just focus on the basic and building a nest egg. I suggest that you start working if you don't have any capital for business. Start small and pick your way towards being independent from your in-laws. I have been in your shoes actually and the first step for me is having a job and goals that have specific time line. Nothing would come out of what we want if don't do anything and just wait for manna to fall from heaven. List down the things that you want to do and put specific time. Then list down your resources and what you need to do then start doing it. Don't be afraid to sweat it out or do harder things.
@caesarin (1091)
• Indonesia
15 Dec 08
Thanks very much for your response. I really much appreciate it. I actually got a job offer I had been already interviewed. I don't whether I'm accepted or not. The thing is that it doesn't pay much but I thought it's better than I just do nothing. But if I got the job and took it, my problem is my in-laws, especially mother in-laws. She doesn't want me to go to work again but she always mentions how woman should earn their own money so they can be free with their own personal expenses. She said I should have a good salary if I want to go to work again. I'm really confused of what to do. I took a job with small salary which to me is better than do nothing but maybe my mother in law have to babysit my children at home. Will she be OK with it? Or should I bring my children to my father, my mother passed away 7 yrs ago. But my father lives with my brothers so there's no female in the house but the servant. But I'm still do the job hunting. Thanks very, very, very much. I'll be in touch with you.