Would you give money to someone who just turned down a job ?

@ronnyb (6120)
Jamaica
December 21, 2008 9:25am CST
Yesterday my friend and my cousin came to look for me .My friend is a painter and is having a little difficulty getting jobs(so he claims ). He has three children and so from time to time I give him a $500 dollars (Jamaican dollars) when I can because I know its hard on him. Yesterday my cousin said to my friend that he has a room that he wanted painted but he only had $1000 dollars which is about one seventh of what he normally works for .To my surprise my painter friend turned it down and later called me aside asking to borrow $2000 dollars. This is not the first that I am hearing him turn down jobs because the money wasn’t what he expected, I remember him turning down a job that was valued about $30000 dollars because he though he should have gotten $40000 dollars ,claiming he works too hard and his job can be dangerous. What would you do ?
6 people like this
17 responses
@LadyMarissa (12161)
• United States
21 Dec 08
Two questions...(1) What does he do with the money he borrows from you??? & (2) When does he plan on paying you back??? I believe in helping the less fortunate. However, he doesn't sound less fortunate. I don't think I would have the funds available for him. He's choosing his fate. Obviously you are more worried about his fate than he is. I feel sorry for his children though. It is not their fault that Daddy makes the wrong choices!!! I believe before giving him any more money, I would feed the children & maybe buy them a gift & then to hell with him!!!
@ronnyb (6120)
• Jamaica
21 Dec 08
I dont know what he does with the money and I dont really expect anything back from him ,I gave him that money.I believe when has money he takes care of his children ,I am just concerned about this selectivity when it comes to his jobs .I dont think he understands that sometimes he needs to settle for less money inorder to survive
2 people like this
@LadyMarissa (12161)
• United States
21 Dec 08
Why should he work for less money when you just hand him money every time he needs it??? His business is slow because he refuses to work for less. i bet there are a lot of hungry painters willing to work for less. Of course, I'm assuming your economy is as bad as ours.
@kerriannc (4280)
• Jamaica
22 Dec 08
Yes the ecomony is as bad as what is experiencing worldwide LadyMarissa. It is that some Jamaicans believe that they should receive a bag of money when they are given a job. They don't understand that some times you have to suck salt through wooden spoon. What I am working for now is peanuts to what I am used to but I still take the job because I can at least paid on my bills. I don't understand the logic behind my countrymen thinking.
1 person likes this
@deebomb (15323)
• United States
21 Dec 08
I think that your friend should be taking the jobs no mater what they pay if he is having to barrow money from you. How dangerous can paining a room be? I have done it before for my self and would gladly take $1000 to do it for someone else. I think your friend has too high of an opinion of him self. When you have family you take what you can get to make sure they are taken care of. It beats setting on your bum. My grandson works as a carry out boy at a grocery store and get $7.25 an hour. He had a costumer tell him he wouldn't work for less than $10.00 and hour as he swiped his welfare card. My grandson is paying that man's food bill with his taxes. That's not right.
@ronnyb (6120)
• Jamaica
21 Dec 08
Yes thats true ,some people wouldnt want to work for minimum wage yet they would beg you who work for it.That is exactly the problem that I am having with my friend,he doesnt understand the sacrifices everyone else is making in this a time when the world is in a recession.He doesnt understand that many person cannot afford to pay him the wages he probably deserves and in the meantime he will have to settle just to make ends meet
2 people like this
@deebomb (15323)
• United States
21 Dec 08
A lot of us are doing just that going with out to make ens meet. I think that some people have a hard time adjusting to making less and doing with less.
2 people like this
• United States
21 Dec 08
i have to agree with marty... do not give him the money! if he is being so picky as to turn down jobs, then he should not be asking you for money! that is ridiculous! it is one thing to help out a friend- i am all for that. but when that friend is not doing anything to help themselves, then it is not your responsibility to bail them out time after time.
2 people like this
@ronnyb (6120)
• Jamaica
21 Dec 08
Thank you for your response ,I feel the same way too,just had an attack of conscience and was wondering if I did the right thing.I have been trying to tell him that these are not times to be picky
1 person likes this
@marty3888 (2359)
• United States
21 Dec 08
That's easy. Not give him the money. You can't do that these days. I lost my job in April. I was making $12.25 an hr. I'm looking for another one and have ever since. When asked what is the minimum pay you will accept, I say $9.00 hr and I even applied for a job that payed $8.75 an hour. These days, hyou take what you can get.
@ronnyb (6120)
• Jamaica
21 Dec 08
My sentiments exactly and that is what I have been trying to tall him that there are difficult times for everyone and hence you have to take what you can get
1 person likes this
@jzqt27 (542)
• Canada
22 Dec 08
it seems like your friend is lazy. i mean like why wouldn't you call him lazy? he turned down an offer and he needs money. especailly when you mention more than 10000 dollars. he must be lazy. if i were you i will tell him that he should starts to do some work and accepts some offers. you also need to tell him that you can't always give him money, you need it for yourself and support your family.
1 person likes this
@singlemommy (2953)
• United States
22 Dec 08
I don't think I would give someone money who wasn't willing to help themselves. I don't know the whole situation of whether or not the money was just for labor or if he was going to have to buy supplies, etc out of the money or what, but if he was going to make a profit then he should have definitely took the job.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Dec 08
wow that's pretty annoying. I would talk to him about it. If it were me I probably would have given him the money at first but after seeing that happen repeatedly I would talk to him about it or just tell him that I don't have the money. I don't really know how much the money is in American dollars but if he's offered really unreasonable amount I can understand where he's coming from but if he expects to get more than is worth the work he's doing I would be mad. I would prefer to work for a little less than to have to borrow from someone else to pay my expenses because over time the amount that you borrow is just gonna add up. If you're not able to pay it back then it can ruin friendships.
• United States
21 Dec 08
I would cut him off. It's ridiculous that he's turning down money especially if he's in the situation where he has to borrow it from friends. He needs to be humbled in some way.
1 person likes this
@CRSunrise (2964)
• United States
22 Dec 08
Since he's not trying, he shouldn't be getting any money from you. If he's being too picky with his jobs, then who's the say he won't begin to get picky with how much he asks for. I wonder if he'd get mad if he came asking for 3000, and you said that you only had 1500. Since he has kids, his first priority should be getting money, not at setting the terms of his jobs.
@zackyo7 (301)
• United States
22 Dec 08
What is wrong with this guy? He can't be serious. If he does such things then he is an idiot. But he is still your friend. I would have just forgot about him. If he does not care about himself then why should you. But then again you do seem to be kind hearted. So I'll leave you with an old saying. "Don't take out your nose to fix someone else" especially if he does not care.
@SHAMRACK (8384)
• India
22 Dec 08
Dear friend, I would lend it that person is too bitter to live, moreover if he is going like again and again for money I would just hesitate and give him some work so that I could give any amount that is reasonable. Lending money again and without getting back is bit uncomfortable. More the amount of money lend too matter according the capacity and necessity of money I do have.
@lazeebee (5468)
• Malaysia
22 Dec 08
Hi Ronnyb, your friend doesn't seem to be needing money that badly, if he can afford to wait until someone pays him better. I definitely won't give/lend this person any money, especially when he can turn down job offers. Unless he's sick or physically unable - if not, I think he's lazy or he overvalue his services.
• China
22 Dec 08
so..so...i think it's hard to define others lifestyle , as a friend of him you can give him a hand on his difficulty days ,but i also sure that most of people will advise you to advise your paiter friend to earn his life by himself,so..why don't you have talk with him?
@Monkeyrose (2850)
• Canada
22 Dec 08
Wow... while your friends is probably right that he deserves more money, when you have children to feed you can't be picky. I would not lend him the money. I now make $10.00/hr as a supervisor. At my previous job I got $25/hr as a management trainee... and $12/hr as an employee. I know I'm worth more.. but i took this job because it is close to home and has good benefits. There is also a possibility of me moving up to assistant manager soon. I'm still looking for a better job but I'll take what I can get for now.... because its better than nothing.
@kerriannc (4280)
• Jamaica
22 Dec 08
Jamaican to Jamaican make him go to hell ronny. In time like this you are turning down money especially it is a friend who is offering you a job. Don't give it to him and if he says you are selfish tell him that you have to work hard for your money and it cannot be spend on persons who don't appreciate its value.
• United States
21 Dec 08
I do not think that I would have given the money to him. If I were to give him the money, I would have given him the difference of what he asked for and what he could have made from the job. I believe that if someone needs money that badly, they would have taken the job, no matter what they were paid. Maybe if he had taken the job, word of mouth would have spread and he would have recieved more jobs. I have to say that I understand where you are coming from if you do not take a job that underpays you. While saying this, if you need the money, you need the money and you should try to take the jobs when they are available.
@suzzy3 (8358)
21 Dec 08
I would not lend anyone money who turned down a job.I would be more inclined to help them out if they did try to earn something themselves.He can afford to turn work down with you giving him money you must stop being so soft,money for nothing is the term I would use,You seem like a good man and he is just taking the mick out of you,You said he has three kids not you.